


but it's this and that's fine

by fondlinsonstyles



Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alpha Harry, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Angst, Bonding, Bottom Louis, Cuddling, Dominant Harry, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Knotting, M/M, Mates, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Louis, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Abuse, Pet Names, Possessive Harry, Protective Harry, Rutting, Sad Louis, Smut, Top Harry, he's just scared, kind of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-04-18 08:04:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 66,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4698458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fondlinsonstyles/pseuds/fondlinsonstyles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and his immediate family run a safe house which Louis gets sent to one day.<br/>Harry's in too deep before he even met him and isn't your normal alpha.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kind of slow. I wanted you to meet harry before you met louis

The sun is rising slowly, already up from the horizon and casting a soft light over the landscape, it looks breathtaking, and Harry Styles is one hundred percent grateful he got to choose the room with the balcony on the top floor of the building. The haze of colour in his view getting brighter and brighter.

Harry does this every morning, he wakes up, showers, goes and helps his mother with everyones breakfast, makes sure everyone has something to eat (breakfast is the most important meal of the day, after all) and then comes and sits on his balcony to watch the world for a while. Sometimes he has music on, sometimes he reads, sometimes, he just sits and thinks, but he never, ever lets anybody else out here with him. It's his place with his plants and his special lounger. Simple as.

A gentle buzz washes over the calm air, his phone trying to grab his attention.

"Hello?"

"Hey Haz, you okay?" His father's voice, Desmond Styles, spills out of the speaker.

"Hiiii dad. I'm good, what about you?"

"Yeah, good thanks bud. There's a new boy coming today, I already told your mum about it, she said she'd tell Gems but that you were on the balcony so I thought I'd ring you,"

"Cool, what's he like?"

"His name is Louis Tomlinson, he's seventeen and his blood test results show omega. He's not given me permission to disclose any information about why he's coming though, sorry bud, gotta respect the kids wishes. He's not yet had his first heat, avoid talking about his family and make sure he eats. He's shy so it will take him some time to warm up to anybody. He'll be taking the bedroom next to yours, please go and make sure it's ready and welcoming for him, fresh towels, bed sheets, the lot. Make sure it's clean too please. Also maybe don't speak to him on the first day, he's terrified of alphas, poor boy. Sorry,"

Harry smiled softly, even knowing his dad couldn't see him.

"Will do and that's fine, dad, when are you coming home?"

"Not sure yet, could be a few months, onto something huge at the moment. I gotta go anyway Harry, love you loads,"

"Love you too, dad, see you soon,"

"Bye,"

Harry doesn't start with his dads wishes with Louis' room until a while later, simply because his mind has been stuck on 'omega'. Harry knows he shouldn't get attatched to someone he hasn't met, but male omegas are rare, and Harry, being gay, is looking forward to meet this omega boy.

Harry is an alpha, proven through blood tests and he's also experienced his first rut, which shocked many people because he was so sweet and gentle. Most people blame it on his upbringing, the fact that his father's job has exposed him to all sorts of troubled people through the safe house he owns. Harry, his mother and his sister, Gemma, run the house, as well as name it, they clean, cook and everything, however everybody in the house helps once they've been there so long.

The house is called Skylar House, meaning protection, shelter.  His father funds and refers people to it, in a sense that if he feels they need somewhere to live or are too vulnerable to live in the proper world they will come and live here. It's very pleasant, three floors, decent sized rooms, some with en suites and some without. It is very safe here and Harry loves it. He's met some of his best friends through it and helped many people.

A few hours after the call, his mum, Anne, has sent him out to get some food for the dinner. He's with Niall Horan a Beta, and probably his best friend in Skylar. Niall's been in the house for around 8 years now, coming in when he was nine. The house only takes in people 18 and under, but won't be forced out on their 18th birthday, they are welcome to stay as long as they like.

Niall's mother and father were Beta drug lords, who neglected Niall, starved him, used him as bait, etc. Harrys father had caught his parents out, and they were sent to prison for life, Niall was sent to Skylar and immediately made friends with Harry, who was ten at the time.

"There's a new lad coming today," Harry says, shoving loads of every vegetable in the shopping trolley.

"Really? What's he in for?"

"I don’t know, dad wouldn't say. Well, he couldn't say. He's in the room next to mine."

"Oh... Shit, has that room ever been occupied?"

"Nope. Means I gotta share my en suite now. Plus, I don't even know if I can talk to him yet. He's scared of alphas apparently. We're not all bad."

"I guess it only takes one bad one then it's that bloomin' facebook status 'all alphas are the same,'" Niall whines, making Harry laugh, "speaking of status, what is he?"

"Omega," Harry answers, avoiding Nialls knowing gaze. Niall knows how bad Harry wants a mate to love and to care for, it's just too bad for Harry that male omegas are the rarest.  
"How many pizza's do we have at home?" Harry asks, trying to get off the subject before Niall starts, he doesn't really want to get stuck on the idea that Louis will want him back, if Harrys alpha approves him as a mate.  
"Wow, rare. And I don't know probably two. Can we get some pringles this time? Pleaaaaase?"  
Niall kisses Harry's cheek to sugarcoat the pleading.  
"Sure, grab some other crisps for everyone else too,"  
"Okay, thank you!"

While Niall is gone, Harry's mind wanders to Louis, does he like pizza? Why hasn't he had his first heat yet?  Why doesn't he want to talk about his family? Or what happened to him? What does he look like? What does he act like?

His mind continues on while he blankly picks up the groceries, picking up everyone's favourite foods as he goes along.  
Niall returns a few minutes later, with three tubes of pringles and at least four multipack bags of crisps, times like these Harry is glad his dad is rich.

"Do you know about the new boys food preferences? We should get him something to make him feel welcome," Niall asks.  
"Nope, dad just said to make sure he eats,"  
"All the more reason to get as much as we can and say we didn't know what to get," Niall laughs.

\--  


During dinner is when Louis arrives. Harry stands up to go and get the door but his mum makes him sit, which is understandable but Harry desperately wants to go and welcome the new omega boy and see what he looks (and maybe smells) like. Five minutes later, his mum reappears, dishing another plate up with some food and then leaves again, only to return empty handed and alone. He can smell something (someone) different on his mum, he can barely smell it, but it's there and it's alluring.  
"Where is he?" Harry asks, even though he knows he's going to be settling in to his room.  
"In his room, he doesn't want to meet anybody today, it's been a long day for him,"  
"Oh, okay, I think, I think I'm going to head to bed early. If that's okay?"  
"Come outside into the hall with me please Harry,"  
Niall shoots him a worried glance as he stands up from the dinner table and follows his mum out of the room. The smell is stronger out here, the source passed through not 5 minutes ago.  
"Listen, Harry, I know it's in your nature to make sure he's not a threat and-"  
"Mum, no-" Harry interjects,   
"No Harry you'll let me finish. I know it's in your nature to make sure he's not a threat and I also know it's in your nature to want to meet a potential mate but you can't meet him tonight, he's exhausted and just needs some alone time, whether your alpha side likes that or not."  
Harry's cheeks are bright red, his hand is awkwardly placed at the back of his neck, he can't meet his mum's eyes, staring intently at a dirty mark on the wall next to her.  
"Mum honestly, I wasn't going up there to meet him,"  
(Well, I was, now I just want to be closer to the smell that is making my brain cloudy with want, he almost says.)  
"You better not be, come here, give me a hug. Me and Gems will wash up tonight."  
He hugs his mum and she makes her way back to eat her dinner and Harry starts his ascent up the stairs. The smell is getting stronger with every single step and it's making his eyes droopy and he wants to hold and protect the source of it.  
He makes it up to the top floor and the smell is everywhere, he traces it to Louis door, he has to go past it to get to his own. (He may or may not stand there for a few seconds, breathing the heavenly scent in, before realising he's being a total creep and storms into his own room, locking the door.)  
He gets ready for bed, stripping out of his clothes and putting a clean pair of boxers on, making sure his phones on charge before he goes to the bathroom, and en suite for his room and the room which Louis now occupies. He's so used to it being only his that he doesn't even think about knocking, just walks right in.  
And there before him, is the source of the smell. And my god, at a glance he is beautiful. Everything about him catches Harry's eyes. His messy, mousy brown hair, his piercing blue eyes, wide and filled with fear, his thin lips and angled cheekbones.  
And oh my, Harry can't help but notice his body, he's short, curvy and everything Harry wants in a mate for physical appearances.  
Harry finally realises he's staring at the younger boy, probably scaring him, if the way he's shaking is anything to go by.  
"Oops," He says,  
"Hi," The small boy blinks quickly, before practically running back into his room and locking it from that side.


	2. meeting louis?? i guess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oo you getting to know louis now

Harry is dumbfounded for a few minutes, just standing and staring at the spot where the small omega was. His scent is lingering in the air and Harry can smell the fear as well as sense it in the atmosphere.  
Harry feels like a monster.  
Bad alphas in the past have given good alphas a bad name, which means he is used to people being wary of him but never this scared.  
Yes, Harry can be dominant when he wants to be, but never without reason. He would never harm another person, unless he was protecting someone else. He has literally spent his life protecting and caring for people.  
But, the fear radiating from Louis was not just a person being wary of alphas. Harry is so pissed off because it probably means he has been mistreated or abused so badly that his fear has extended from just the source to being the entire alpha population.  
Harry decides he's going to try and make Louis see that not all alphas are bad. It's probably going to be the most difficult task he has ever done but he thinks it will be worth it.  
He knocks on Louis' side of the door and speaks slowly, so not to scare the boy.  
"I'm in the room next to yours, if you need to you can lock the door to my room from inside of here, you've probably guessed there's a lock on each side now. Just make sure you unlock it when you leave so I can get in please. Sorry for walking in on you. You can also ask me if you need anything like a glass of water. Goodnight."  
He doesn't get a reply, but he hears some shuffling so he counts it as a win.  


\--  


Once Harry is in bed he makes a grab for his phone, sending a message to Cara, his best friend out of Skylar.

_Code red_

She comes back not seconds later with a reply.

_Sup boo?_

_Perfection in human form_

_Omega?_

_Yep  
Help he's scared of me :-( _

Cara is an omega herself, however she is mated and in a happy relationship with her girlfriend. Harry met her in preschool and they have literally been best friends since. It's actually rather funny because everyone always thought that they would end up together but both of them turned out gay. 

_If he only got there today haz then let him settle in_

_I didnt mean to meet him, hes in the room next to mine and he was stood at the sink when i walked in the bathroom, I forgot I had to share :(  
I was in my fuckin boxers cara _

_Did he speak to you?_

_He said hi then ran off_

_Oh  
Do you know what he's there for_

_No_

_Oh  
I'll come round tomorrow if you want hazza?_

_Please :(  
i can smell him from my room_

_just get some sleep dude_

If Harry is honest, he knows why him and Cara got along so well, he knew from a young age that they weren't compatible, but he always craved the comfort of being near an omega, and the same with Cara and alphas. Female alphas are also rare but not as rare as male omegas so Cara was usually in the same boat as him, lonely and needy.

\---

The cab driver rings the doorbell to Skylar house and Louis' heart is beating a million miles an hour, he can't breathe properly and he is shaking. A few moments later the door opens to reveal a woman with warm eyes, he can smell that she's an omega, which makes him feel slightly better.  
"Hi! You must be Louis?"  
Louis simply nods, not trusting his voice.  
"Right, well welcome to your new home, we'll go get you settled in,"  
She takes the bit of luggage that the cab driver had and thanks him, then leads Louis up to the top floor and shows him his room.  
It is amazing.  
Louis had to sleep in a room _just_ big enough for an old mattress and a box for his stuff. He's sure it was intended to be a storage cupboard, but he was just happy that he _had_ a room to himself  
"Okay, take a seat Louis," The woman smiles warmly, pulling a chair out from the desk to sit on, as Louis sits on the end of his new bed. He thinks how amazing it already feels, it feels brand new, and bouncy.  
"I'm Anne, it's nice to meet you Louis. I'd like to welcome you to your new home and obviously this is your bedroom. I ask of you not to deface any furniture that is here already, but you're free to paint the room how you like and customise as you wish. Through that door is an en suite with a bath, shower, toilet and sink in, however, it is shared with my son. You were sent here by my husband, you'll be completely safe here. Now, I'll leave you to sort your unpacking out, unless you want some help?"  
Louis shakes his head politely,  
"I think I can manage, thank you, though,"  
"Okay, I'll go get you some food, I'll be back soon,"  
Louis feels extremely lucky. There's a desk! And an actual wardrobe, and shelves! Even though he doesn't have anything to put on them, it's a basic thing that he's never had the luxury of having.  
The door knocks, before opening, revealing Anne with a plate full of food. She makes her way over to put it on the desk for him.  
"Here's some food for you, I won't make you meet everyone tonight, don't worry. But everyone is lovely and I'm sure everyone is looking forward to meeting you tomorrow, please don't hesitate to come and find me if you have a problem. I'm usually in the kitchen, or in the room next to the kitchen, which is my bedroom. Both are on the bottom floor, bye Louis,"  
"Bye, thank you," He manages to reply before the door closes.  
Louis stares at the plate for about 30 seconds before deciding against eating, his nerves will probably make him throw it back up. It's pizza anyway, so he can have it later when it's cold.  
Instead, he gets up and looks round the room for a minute, before deciding to check out the en suite. He's in shock for a minute because this en suite is better than his bathroom at his old house. He looks towards the door on the other side for a moment before noticing the products on the sink, a toothbrush, toothpaste and some hair gel. He can smell a tinge of alpha, and he momentarily panics before remembering that this is a safe house and although it's a comforting thought, it doesn't do much to calm his nerves. Louis wonders briefly what the alpha looks like, not having to wait long before he's finding out, the door leading to the other room flies open, and Louis jumps back a little, pretty much shitting himself.  
He brings himself to look up at the alpha (it's undeniable that it is an alpha, his smell is overpowering). The alpha is just in his boxers and Louis is wondering what he did to deserve such a godly sight. Louis is still panicking though, he isn't able to trust alphas. The alpha looks at him in the eyes after a few seconds, and slowly drawls out, "Oops,"  
His voice is so deep and so alpha. Fuck.  
Louis squeaks out "Hi," remembering his manners before he's rushing out his side of the bathroom, and slamming the lock shut, breathing heavy. He feels stupid, standing a few steps away from the door, staring at it as if he can see through it.  
A few moments later, he hears some soft knocks and the deep voice is speaking,  
"I'm in the room next to yours, if you need to you can lock the door to my room from inside of here, you've probably guessed there's a lock on each side now. Just make sure you unlock it when you leave so I can get in please. Sorry for walking in on you. You can also ask me if you need anything like a glass of water. Goodnight."  
Louis doesn't know how to reply to it, so he just moves to begin unpacking his stuff from the suitcase and backpack he has.  
He wonders where his brother and sisters are and whether they are alright. Louis was the lucky one, them, not so much, and he feels awful, but Desmond said that they would find them and make sure they are safe and if possible, send them here.  
Once all his luggage is put away, his nerves have calmed a lot, he can still smell the alpha, it's a curse and a luxury he will have to get used to because it seems to be a continuous smell from the other room.  
He wonders what he can get to put on the shelves. Maybe he could get some frames for the pictures he has of his siblings, or he could make some new friends here and have pictures of them framed on there. Maybe a candle for his desk. Everything looks so empty. But it feels safe, it feels like a home.  


\--  


He sleeps like a baby that night. It is honestly the comfiest sleep he has ever had, the mattress feels like a cloud. He's so used to sleeping on the mattress he's had for around 11 years

The next morning, Louis wakes to a knocking on the door, it turns out to be Anne, who greets him and tells him to shower. She has a bag with her, which she gives to him and leaves the room, saying she'll be back in half an hour to take him to breakfast and meet everyone. Louis is terrified but thanks her anyway and when she leaves he room he empties the bag on his bed.  
There's deodorant, showergel, bubblebath, a new toothbrush, shampoo, conditioner, hairgel, facewash etc. Basically there's everything. There's even a bath bomb. (Louis has never had a bathbomb. He can't wait to use it.)  
Louis arranges it on his desk and then goes to screw the bag up, but something hard in the bag stops him from doing so. He pulls it out and it's a piece of card with a note on it, it must've gotten caught when he emptied the bag. 

_Hi Louis,_  
_Sorry again for scaring you last night, I didn't mean to. My mum sent me and Cara out for some stuff for you so I just got whatever I could think of, sorry if you don't like it. You're welcome to use any of my stuff in the shower if you like it better. Hope you have a good day._  
_Harry xx_

Louis stares at the card for at least a minute after reading it. Are all alphas supposed to be this nice? He signed it with two kisses! And he apologised. Louis rarely got apologies, most people didn't think they had to because he was an omega, and they usually make Louis apologise, even if he's done nothing wrong. The thing that was bothering him most was who is Cara? 

(He also tucks the card into his notebook, which is in his bedside table. Not many people are nice to Louis, especially alphas. He's savouring what he's getting. Even if the alpha in question is probably mated.) 

\--- 

Harry's on the sofa in the living room with Cara, she keeps trying to tickle him but he's barely ticklish. The room is bright from the sunlight shining it, it's about 11am. Cara is always an early riser so she arrived at about 8.30, forcing Harry into the shower and chilling on his bed until he was done. At nineish his mum sent them both out to get some stuff for Louis, instead of helping her with sorting out the breakfast. When he'd picked up the bathbomb, Cara had said,  
"Mate, you're fucking whipped," Which Harry had denied, but he knows she's right.  
After a while of laughing at Cara's failed attempts he hears his mum start her way up the stairs, probably to wake up everyone that hasn't already and bring Louis down to meet everyone. Cara hugs him and tells him not to be nervous. But how could he not be? Louis probably hates him, he burst into the bathroom on him, scared him on his first day at Skylar, all while in his boxers.  
A few minutes later and everyone but Anne and Louis is sitting round the table, all eating their breakfast and chatting. Even the people that have already eaten are here, ready to meet Louis. Harry kind of wants to hug Louis, and protect him, and make sure he's not scared, but he doesn't want to scare the boy any more, so he decides it's best for him to keep his distance until Louis approaches him. Cara is stuffing her face with the food and bantering with Liam. Liam Payne is an mated alpha, he's here because he was in an "Early developed alpha porn" business (basically a child alpha porn business), which had unfair treatment of alphas, from what Liam has told him in the past, they'd inject them so they were unviolent when they weren't being filmed, when they were being filmed, they would be injected with a substance which made them uncontrollably fuck whoever. Apparently they had to have metal chains around their mouths to ensure they didn't bite and mate the one they were fucking. The business came to a messy end, and because it was Liam that was able to find out the address he was being held at, and report it (to Harry's father) he was in danger.  
Harry can't imagine Liam ever being violent, he is a massive teddy bear in human form, another example of an alpha who isn't abusive of their power. Liam is safe now though. All of the owners of the company were sent to prison, Liam stays at Skylar because he classes it as home.  
Harry is snapped out of his thoughts when Louis' smell becomes much more prominent. Less than five seconds later, his mum walks into the room with Louis not far behind her. He looks adorable, he's in a baggy sweater, sweater paws and everything. His hair is fluffy, showing it's just been washed.  
"Everyone, this is Louis! He arrived yesterday, Louis, you can sit next to Zayn, the dark haired one who should be eating not sketching,"  
"I ate earlier, Anne, Hey Louis,"  
Harry watches as Louis whispers a 'hey', he obviously can smell that Zayn is a beta. Zayn piles Louis a plate of fruit and breakfast bits while Louis stays staring down at his hands which are held together under the table.  
Harry's brows are furrowed, he wants Louis to feel comfortable.  
As soon as Anne leaves the room, Louis is bombarded with questions.  
"How old are you?" "Why are you here?" "Where are you from?" "Do you have any family?"  
Harry is getting more and more aggravated, he can tell Louis is getting more and more uncomfortable and clearly doesn't want to, and won't answer them, nor should they be asking these questions, it is one of the rules, then two questions at the same time really piss Harry off.  
"When did you find out you were an omega?" And "Have you had your first heat?".  
These questions spark Harry's alpha to life.  
"ENOUGH." Harry growls, his chair scraping across the floor as he stands up, asserting all dominance. His hands are balled up into fists and for the first time since Louis sat down, he looks up. Louis and Harry meet eyes, Harry's alpha is fuming. He wants nothing more than to just take Louis away from everyone and feed him his breakfast while he's in his arms, safe.  
They maintain eye contact until he feels Cara touch his arm hesitantly. Harry jerks his arm away.  
"Don't come near me." Harry says, drinking in everyone's expressions before storming out the room and up to his balcony.  
Harry's alphas is absolutely fuming. Scratch that, Harry himself is fuming. None of them had the right to say any of that. Harry knows he doesn't have the right to be this angry or possessive of Louis too, though. He thinks back to the table, everyone's expression before he left. They just looked shocked. Harry has almost never, if not ever shown his alpha side so publicly. 

\---

"Is he okay?" Louis hears someone whisper to Cara (he assumes), the same Cara who is burning holes into him with her eyes. Everyone has stopped asking questions. Well, everyone has just completely stopped talking.  
"He will be, just don't go near his room or anything. I'm gonna go speak to Anne." Cara empties her plate and leaves the room. Louis stays stays staring at his hands. He can't stop thinking about the bite mark on Cara's neck. She's really pretty. Tall, thin, confident, female, omega. Louis never really had a chance. He assumed (stupidly) Harry was into guys, but he was wrong. And Harry also has Cara, the complete opposite of him. While he was short and curvy, Cara was tall and skinny. Louis wants his siblings. Even though he was the strong one for them, the 'adult' as such, they were and are his foundations, his reason to be strong. He hopes they're okay. Des said he was trying his best.  
As everyone in the room finishes their breakfast, leaving one by one, until it's just him, Zayn, a blonde, and an alpha. The alpha doesn't smell right, isn't like Harry, too musky. Harry's is like a fresh breeze and an old book store in one. Refreshing and comforting.  
"So, Louis, right?" The blonde speaks in a surprisingly strong Irish accent.  
"I, er, yeah," Louis manages to say.  
"I'm Niall, nice to meet you! This here is Liam, and you already sort of know Zayn. We won't bombard you with questions, don't worry."  
"Thank you,"  
"You've probably already had the welcome from Anne, but I don't suppose you've had a look round, have you?" Liam speaks up this time.  
"Um, no. I've only been in my room and the bathroom,"  
"We could show you around if you like?" Louis nods.  
"You should at least eat something first," Niall says with a smile. Louis ends up eating a pancake and some fruit, while Niall helps himself to everything left on the table. Louis doesn't talk, just listens to Liam, Niall and Zayn talk. They all seem like nice people, nicer than all of the people asking him questions earlier. Louis also wonders what Harry's doing. And wonders why he got angry. Maybe he doesn't like noise.

"So on the first floor there's the girls rooms, c'mon, we'll show you where our rooms are."  
It turns out there are 7 males. Louis, Harry, Niall, Liam, Zayn, Aiden, Nick and Max. Max apparently shares a room with Eleanor on the girls floor and Nick and Aiden share half of the attic above Niall's and Liam's rooms. Louis can't help but giggle at Niall bitching about how loud they play their music.  
All are Beta, apart from Louis, an omega, and Liam and Harry, who are alphas.  
Niall mentions that there are only five girls at the moment. There are a few spare rooms on the girls floor but Louis took the last one on the boys floor.  
They make their way out the back, after Niall has shown him round downstairs, showing him the living room, the kitchen, Anne's bedroom, the gym, the dining room and the utility room.  
They all sit down at the table near the pond. There's decking around it then a field over the back fence.  
"So Louis, how was your first night?" Liam asks.  
"I er, I slept like a baby, actually,"  
"Good, we all did when we first got here."  
"If you don't mind me asking, how long have you all been here for?"  
Niall looks up from his phone,  
"I've been here for eight years," He says before looking back down at his phone.  
"I've been here for five," Liam smiles.  
"I've only been here for two years," Zayn lays back, basking in the sunlight.  
"And how old are you all? If that's okay to ask, too,"  
This time Liam answers for all of them.  
"I'm eighteen, the same as Zayn, Niall is seventeen. How old are you, Louis?"  
"I'm seventeen. Um, how old... How old is Harry?"  
"Harry's eighteen, but he seems older because he learnt to drive as soon as he could, plus Anne makes him go do all the outside errands, like shopping and stuff. It's safer for him to go than Gemma. She's older but she's an omega."  
"Oh, okay, where did Harry go? Should I be asking that? Sorry,"  
"Don't be sorry bro, he's just there,"  
Louis panics at Niall's words thinking that he's right behind him, before he looks up to where he's pointing. He shoots Niall a confused look, because he cant see anything.  
"He's probably on his balcony, word of warning, he's never let anybody there, so don't even try and go on his balcony,"  
"Oh. Not even Cara? That was Cara at the table wasn't it?"  
He see's Liam's brows furrow, and panics that he said something wrong.  
"No, not even Cara," Niall answers and looks back down at his phone.  
They sit in silence for about an hour, enjoying the sun and the fish swimming in the pond.  
Louis keeps on glancing up at the balcony, hoping to catch a glimpse of Harry. He feels bad though, because Harry is mated, and not to him.  
"I, I think I'm going to go to my room if that's okay? Am I allowed to sleep? It's already been a long day. I'm not used to socialising."  
"Yeah bro, of course, I'm gonna head up to my room too. Wanna play GTA Zayn?"  
"Sure, you coming Liam?"  
"Nah, I'll chill out here for a bit. Might ring Sophia."  
Niall winks at Liam then, and the three make their way up to the top floor, saying bye when Louis goes into his room.  
Louis decides to thank Harry for making everyone stop earlier that day. So he takes out his notebook, reading through Harry's note to him from earlier. 

_Hi Harry,_  
_Thank you for getting the bathroom stuff earlier. I love it all. Thank Cara too._  
_Also..._  
_Thanks for what you did at the table..._  
_Louis xx_

Louis had hesitated with the two 'x's but decided to put them because Harry did. He unlocks his side of the bathroom and slides the note underneath Harry's side of the bathroom door, before locking his side again and starts drawing at his desk. 

\--- 

Harry ends up napping on the balcony sofa to calm himself down before going into his room and checking his phone from where he'd thrown it on his bed.  
He has nine messages.

 **Cara**  
_what the fuck was that haz?_

_dont ignore me_

_im telling anne what happened_

_ring me later, im going home._

 

 **Niall**  
_yo we showed louis around_

_we at the pond, he keeps asking about u_

_and he keeps looking up at ur balcony ;) he thinks hes being discreet lol_

_hes in his room,sleepin i think . me n zayn playing gta if u wanna play_

 

 **Liam**  
_gone 2 visit sophia cant find your mum or gemma_

 

Harry texts Liam an ' _okay_ ' and Niall a ' _you still playing?_ '

Then as he's about to ring Cara his eye catches a note, and walks over and picks it up, 

_Hi Harry,_  
_Thank you for getting the bathroom stuff earlier. I love it all. Thank Cara too._  
_Also..._  
_Thanks for what you did at the table..._  
_Louis xx_

Harry's heart flutters, which, what the fuck? It's never done that before.  
He puts the note down on his desk and texts Cara.

_Sorry, I didn't mean to do that. Went sleep._

He receives two messages shortly after.  
**Cara**  
_It's okay bro, hope you're okay_

 **Niall**  
_Yh come chill_

Harry makes his way to Niall's room and flops on the sofa next to Zayn.  
"So, what the fuck happened earlier?" Niall doesn't beat around the bush.  
"I dunno, everyone knows they shouldn't ask questions, it just pissed me off you know?"  
"Hmm, sure, that's totally it," Niall raises his eyebrow and Zayn laughs.  
"Shut up, Ni, give me a controller."  
Niall obliges and they don't mention that morning again.


	3. 'little one'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy this one, this is just Louis' second day of being at Skylar! (Throughout the whole chapter!)  
> Also the large portion in italics is a flashback incase you were confused

Louis has been in his room for a while, the alarm clock reads 2.34pm when he checks. He's dying for a drink and fancies more than just water, so he ventures down the stairs and into the kitchen. The smell of fresh food hits him like a tonne of red bricks. It smells great, he assumes it's some sort of fajita thing for lunch but he isn't too sure. The next thing he sees is Harry at the oven frying something, probably the something that smells good. He stares at him for a minute, god, even his back is attractive. He's wearing a white shirt and his hair tied up in a bun at the top of his head. Louis can see every single muscle in his back moving while he cooks, and damn, it's endearing.  
He's scared to enter the room properly though, scared of Harry getting mad, or telling him to get out. He wonders for a while if he should knock on Anne's door and ask her, but Harry had said he can ask him for anything if he needed to, but did he mean it? Did it just apply for last night? He's not sure.  
"Oh. Louis. Are you okay?"  
Shit, he was so caught up in his thoughts he didn't even see Harry turn around. (He doesn't know that Harry could smell him the second he walked in).  
"Erm, yeah, I guess. I just.. kinda.. needed a drink..." Louis is sure his face is as red as is possible. And he can't even look up and meet Harry's eyes, the floor suddenly being ever so interesting.  
"Okay then, erm, we have orange juice, apple juice, squash, milk? Any of them sound okay?"  
"Orange juice sounds good,"  
Louis finally looks up and Harry is glancing at him over his shoulder. They maintain eye contact for a few seconds before Harry turns back to face the oven, saying,  
"Sure, you wanna grab a glass? They're in that top cupboard nearest you. I've just got to add the peppers,"  
Louis mumbles out a short 'okay' before making his way towards the cupboard, which, oh dear.  
He can see the glasses through the glass door of the cupboard, and he knows for a _fact_ he can't reach them.  
Regardless, he tries anyway, stretching out as far as he can, his shirt riding up and his fingertips just grazing the glass. It's safe to say he fails miserably.  
"Here, let me," He hears, and then their bodies are literally _pressed_ together and Louis holds his breath as Harry grabs the glass. Louis is more turned on than he cares to admit, he's sure in his mind that if he'd have had his first heat, he'd be leaking slick everywhere, because Harry is literally _towering_ over him. Louis feels so small, and he loves it. Harry's warmth is radiating onto his back, where it's flush against Harry's chest.  
He can smell Harry so much, and yeah, he's smelt the alpha but he hasn't smelt him like this, up close and personal. It's so dominant, but there's a soft side to it. He feels safe, and this is the first time he's ever been this close to an alpha and felt safe.  
Louis almost lets out a whine when Harry pulls away, his face flushing at how embarrassingly needy he feels. Harry hands the glass over.  
Realisation then dawns on Louis, that Harry is _mated_ and he feels so bad for getting turned on by the contact. He feels bad because he felt safe in an alphas arms that isn't his. He feels bad because the alpha only meant to help. He mainly feels bad because the alpha is not _his_.  
"I, erm, thanks, I guess, sorry," He says, without thinking, quickly grabbing the orange juice out of the fridge and pouring it in the glass. He's ignoring Harry's look, because he knows he's going to be looking at him weirdly.  
"Thanks." He mumbles then rushes back to his room. 

 

\---

 

Harry is so fucking pissed off with himself.  
All the years he's kept his alpha under control, and when he finally meets a male omega, who is unmated and has even the slightest chance of being his mate, and he has lost it twice in one day. Not only did he fuck up at breakfast, he also just probably scared the hell out of Louis. He wasn't thinking about Louis' past and grabbed the glass for him, only realising that it would bring them flush together, when it happened. Yeah, it turned Harry (and his alpha) on. And that's another reason he is pissed off with himself because wow, taking advantage much. So Harry is sad, pissed off and horny. Not a good combination, especially when he can't even do anything about it because he's making lunch today.  
He goes back to cooking, stirring slightly more aggressively than he probably should.

 

\--

 

Everyone is downstairs, eating the lunch, Harry is upstairs, on his bed, trying to ignore his _very_ hard dick. His mind can't stop remembering how small Louis was when he was against him. He can't stop inhaling so, so deeply, so he can catch Louis' scent coming from his room. He's not even in there, is the thing. He's downstairs eating his lunch silently. Niall keeps texting him, even though Harry isn't replying.

 

**Niall**  
_How come u aint eating with us?_

 

_foods good btw cheers_

 

_Louis isn't talking_

 

_Zayn asked him if he was ok n he barely even nodded_

 

_Is he okay?_

 

To be honest, after thinking on it, Harry reckons he is the worst person in the world. He doesn't even know what happened to Louis and he probably triggered something. That makes his dick shy away because his alpha side is most definitely _not_ into being the cause to a very attractive boy's sadness.

 

He finally texts Niall back, a simple ' _I'm not hungry. Can you play some fifa with him after dinner or something? If possible just you two? I'm gonna go out._ '  
He's going to go to town with Cara and tell her what happened. She's an omega, she probably knows what to do. She'll probably say like, to say sorry or something. Harry thinks he might buy him something nice.  
He grabs a coat and shoves on some battered, old, brown boots. (He knows they need throwing away, but he's so attached to them, he can't bring himself to. Sue him.)  
He runs down the stairs, grabbing his keys and walking into the dining room where everyone is, including his mum.  
"I'm nipping out for coffee with Cara, you need anything anyone?"  
There are a chorus of things that various people want, which he memorises easily, so used to it. He makes eye contact with Louis, only to immediately look away because he looks so sad. He also sees the look Niall gives them both. Harry feels like dog shit. 

 

He arrives at Cara's house not five minutes later, walking straight in and up to Cara's room, knocking and hearing shuffling.  
"Come in!"  
Harry walks in to Cara on one side of the bed, with messy hair and swollen lips, and Cara's alpha, looking quite the same.  
"Oh, shit, sorry I'll go, nevermind," He makes to leave but Cara's alpha, Lydia, shakes her head.  
"No, it's cool, I'm late for work anyway, I was meant to leave ten minutes ago to get there on time," She chuckles.  
"Oh, it's in town right? I'll give you a lift if you want? I'm headed that way anyway,"  
"Oh would you?! That'd be great! Thank you!" Lydia immediately jumps up and starts brushing her hair.  
"You coming into town Cara? I wanna talk to you over like, coffee or something. I'll pay,"  
"I'll pay for mine don't worry," Cara says, also getting up to refresh her makeup and hair.  
"I'm going to wait in the car, don't be long,"  
In the car his phone buzzes, he considers not checking it, thinking it's probably someone telling him something else to fetch while he's out, but he checks it anyway.  
**Niall**  
_louis n me are playing fifa. Think zayn is coming later_

 

 

\---

 

_Louis is sat on his bed. He can hear his mummy and daddy shouting at each other. He cant hear what they are saying, but he keeps on hearing his name. He's hugging his teddy to his chest, it's late and he shouldn't be awake but they woke him up. He feels sick, because he's never heard his dad yell before. He's too young to understand but this is the beginning of his omega traits. Any alpha shout that isn't their bonded or soulbond tends to make them feel sick, or get nauseous._  
_He walks downstairs to tell his mummy, she always tells him to tell her when he doesn't feel well. It gets worse when he gets closer to the source of the shouts._  
_"I'm not staying if he's a fucking omega!" He hears his dad shout._  
_"Fuck you Troy, he has no choice! You took that chance when you got me pregnant. If you didn't want an omega then you should have fucking wrapped it up, twat!"_  
_"I don't mind omegas! Proper omegas, female omegas! I don-"_  
_He is interrupted by a young Louis, standing in the doorway with his teddy clutched to his chest._  
_"Mummy. I feel sick," Louis pouts._  
_"See what you've done?" She shouts at his dad._  
_"Fuck you Johannah, I didn't do anything. He's the one that shouldn't be what he is," He spits out the last words._  
_Louis starts hyperventilating._  
_"Mum, mummy, I'm going to be-" is all he gets out before he's throwing up on the kitchen floor. He's crying hard, unable to breathe and his dad is looking at him like he caused the World Wars._  
_His mum comes over and picks him up, moving him from the mess. He watches his dad storm out of the room._  
_"Shh, baby, it's okay, let's get you cleaned up," His mum strips him down and cleans him with a wet towel._  
_"It's okay, everything is going to be okay," She's whispering to him, he's still crying. He doesn't know what he did wrong. He doesn't know why his dad is so angry, why he isn't looking after him like is mother is. What is an omega? Is he one? Is being one bad? Why? His little brain is overworking itself. He sits on the floor when his mum has finished cleaning him, holding his teddy, watching his mum who is now cleaning up the sick on the ground._  
_"I'm sorry, mummy, I didn't mean to," He says, when he's stopped crying so much._  
_"It's okay, baby, you're okay. It wasn't your fault,"_  
_He doesn't say anything back to her, he's feeling sleepy again, now that his dad isn't shouting._  
_There are footsteps on the stairs then, and his dad appears with a suitcase,_  
_"Are you going on holiday, daddy?"_  
_"Shut up," He shouts at Louis, then turns to Johannah, "I'm leaving, goodbye. I'll be sending the divorce papers soon,"_  
_Louis watches as his mum starts to cry, standing up._  
_"You are a coward if you leave now,"_  
_"Don't you dare call me a coward,"_  
_Louis stays in the kitchen while his mum follows his dad into the hallway. He can't see them but he can hear them. All of a sudden the is a sickening 'slap' sound, and then his mum is sobbing. He hears the front door opening, so he goes to check if his mummy is alright._  
_His dad is in the doorway with his suitcase,_  
_"Daddy?" Louis doesn't know where his dad is going. Why is he leaving? Will he be back?_  
_He turns to face Louis and says,_  
_"You are a disgrace,"_  
_And then slams the door._  
_Louis is too young to understand what this means, but there is not a day that goes by that he doesn't think about it now._  
_He hears his mum sob on the floor next to him. Her whole face is flushed and she's got tear stains streaming down it, but there's a handprint on her left cheek which stands out, and Louis starts crying._  
_"It's okay Louis, I'm okay, come on, let's get you to bed, do you want some milkshake to take up?_  
_"Yes please mummy,"_  
_"Come on then," She gets up and locks the door, she still has tears streaming down her face and Louis is only in his underwear but she picks him up anyway and holds him close as she walks them into the kitchen. She puts Louis on the side when she's making the milkshake, but she doesn't stop crying. She doesn't stop crying when she gives him the warm bottle, or when she's carrying him up the stairs. She doesn't stop crying when she's redressing him in warm clothes and tucking him in to bed._  
_Louis doesn't like to see his mum cry, so when she gives him a goodnight kiss, he lifts his teddy to her cheeks and as gently as a two year old can, he wipes the tears away from her cheeks, making sure to be extra careful on her left cheek._  
_Louis' mum doesn't stop crying that night._

 

\--

 

Louis feels like he's going to cry. He's so scared of alphas, yet one he actually likes, he can't have. He's not saying he isn't scared of Harry because he kind of is, but Harry is the first alpha that's ever really done a kind act to him or got close to him physically without hurting him. Yes, he knows Harry's father was also nice by pretty much rescuing him from a home which he wasn't safe in, but Harry is nice in a different way. It's not his proper _job_ to be nice to Louis. Louis thinks he disgusted Harry so much this morning that he has to go out and see his _own_ omega, just to get rid of Louis' smell and the mere thought of him.  
He doesn't eat much through lunch, even though it's delicious and he's very hungry. He's not even used to eating decent sized meals. Nobody is really talking to him through lunch though, either. Which he is grateful for..

 

 

Being a male omega is difficult, as well as being a gay male omega. Either way, there are people that find it horrifying that a man can submit to another man, or even _worse_ a woman. There are laws trying to pass now, where male omegas are treated as well as female omegas, but it's difficult because male omegas are so rare, the laws are almost counted as not even worth passing.  
Female omegas aren't treated badly, there is a hierarchy that will always exist, of which they are just above the male omegas. The only thing that will never change is that alphas are far superior and always at the top of the hierarchy. 

 

There are some people that treat male omegas like an angels wing. These tend to be gay, male alphas and a fair amount of Betas, or sometimes, straight female alphas. But anybody outside of that usually hates them, thinks they are a disgrace.

 

 

Thankfully though, instead of wallowing in self pity, alone in a dark room, Niall has invited him to play fifa in his room. He's rather scared at first because it's a new room and he's only really been in four rooms since he got here, the kitchen, the dining room, his bedroom and the en suite. Obviously he was shown around by Niall and Zayn and Liam but he is not comfortable going to the places alone. He isn't sure who is in there, who is tolerant of male omegas and not. He's just cautious, is all. Years of living the life he did has made him realise how careful he has to be at all times. 

 

"So you can treat this room like your own, it's a mess anyways y'know," Niall says, walking them up to his room.  
"Thank you, what did you say we were playing?"  
"Oh, Fifa, you ever played it?"  
"I think I did round Stan's once, I was really bad at it,"  
"Well you can come and play it with me anytime, Harry and Zayn always get bored with it," Niall chuckles.  
"What about Liam?"  
"Well, Mr Payne is usually at his omegas house,"  
"What about Harry?"  
"What?"  
Thankfully they've reached Niall's room so Louis doesn't have to repeat it, Niall ignores it anyway, getting the controllers and passing one to Louis and then texting on his phone.  
Louis wonders why Niall didn't say that Harry spent time with his omega. Unless Cara is usually with them, the thought makes him feel sick, he doesn't have any right to feel jealous if Harry is with another omega, yet he _does_.  
"So this button passes the ball..."

 

 

\---

 

"Cara, you don't understand. I fucking pressed myself into him! I'm talking crotch to ass action. It was uncalled for, I wish there was a undo button in real life. I wasn't even supposed to talk to him on the first day and here I am on day two pressing myself against him,"  
"You didn't mean to though, just go apologise?"  
"I'm scared I will scare him though. It literally made my ... Wait nevermind," Harry looks away, blushing.  
"Are you trying to say it turned you on? Harry you know I've literally walked in on you wanking? And you've walked in on me having sex _how_ many times?"  
"It's not that, just like, being that close to him shouldn't affect me so much. And his smell, fuck," Harry lets his head slam on the table.  
"Ew gross! Get your greasy hair out of my drink you sicko!"  
"It's not even in your drink, prat," He lifts his head anyway.  
"I just don't know what to do, I think he is scared of me, and I don't want to fuck up. I want to _be_ there for him and hug him and everything else. I want to mate him,"  
Harry realises what he just said with wide eyes.  
"Harry," Cara starts slowly, "you know you've never felt like this about anyone..."  
"Yeah,"  
"You know what this could mean?"  
And yeah, of course he does, even though it's only just crossed his mind, that's probably the reason that he's so affected by Louis, is the thing. But he can't even think about that right now because Harry and Louis and barely on speaking terms. He's annoyed because past alpha/s have made his job (if what Cara is saying is true) difficult now.  
"Yeah," He replies.  
"Why don't we get you two talking first, yeah? Do you need to go shopping? I need to go get some toothpaste,"  
"Yeah," He says, yet again.  


\--  


He isn't sure how they end up in Lush (for the second time today), they've got everything they need.  
He looks at the bath bombs and bubble bars and wonders when Louis will use his bath bomb. Cara must follow his gaze because he's suddenly being dragged to them, and Cara is shoving them in his face, saying 'oh, smell this one!'. He picks up a pink and white swirly one, and smells it while looking at the information card. It smells great, he wants to get it for Louis. And yeah he got him bubblebath this morning but he didn't get him a _bubblebar._  
He put it in the little basket, looking away from Cara's inevitable smirk, and hears her whisper, 'whipped' when he's looking at the gold and glittery bath bomb. He picks up a bath bomb for his mum too, she deserves it.

 

\--

 

"Mum, I'm home," He knocks on his mums bedroom door, and walks in when invited.  
"Oh good! Erm, Cara told me what happened at breakfast?"  
"..yeah.." Harry looks down.  
"You've never done that before,"  
"I know. I'm sorry,"  
"Don't be sorry, just remember we _are_ a safe house, Harry. You can't shout at people like that,"  
"They shouldn't have been asking such intrusive questions then,"  
"Harry," His mum says sternly, glaring at him.  
He's silent for a few seconds, before remembering the bath bomb, thanking the Gods that he has it now for a change of subject.  
"I got you a bath bomb from Lush,"  
"Oh! Really? Thank you!"  
He grabs it out of the Lush bag and hands it her, says goodbye, knowing she has to start dinner with Gemma soon, and goes and gives everyone what they asked for. He nips into his room, writing a little card to leave in the en suite with the bubble bar, which he does and then finds his phone and sends a quick text to Niall, simply saying ' _You still with Louis?_ '

 

**Niall**  
_ye you want me to ask if it's okay if you come and chill?_

 

He thinks for a minute, thinking it's better if he does or doesn't.

 

_Yeah. Please._

 

_he said that's fine bro_

 

Harry then sprays himself down to make sure he smells nice, even though he knows Alpha scents are nicer to Omegas. He's probably subconsciously trying to cover that up because he scared Louis earlier. He messes with his hair for a few seconds, making sure it looks good, then he makes his way out of the room and into Niall's.

 

Niall and Louis turn around as soon as the door opens, Harry notices Louis first but nods at Niall first, the smiles at Louis and says a polite 'hello'. Louis' mouth turns up a little in reply. He looks beautiful when he smiles. He's trying to be as non threatening as possible, his movement is slow, his face showing no sign of alpha.  
He senses that Louis is definitely a lot calmer than he was in the kitchen earlier, his smell only emanates a tiny amount of fear, which Harry doesn't think will go for a while.  
He sits down on the sofa and watches them finish the game they're on, not really speaking, just listening to Louis' voice and Niall's chat away. Louis' voice is a lot quieter than Nialls, but Harry can hear him much more than he can hear Nialls. He thinks that he'd probably hear Louis more than even the loudest of sounds.  
Niall ends up winning the match between him and Louis, then gets up and throws Harry a controller.  
Harry gets his phone and sends a sneaky text to Niall, a simple, ' _Let Louis win this one_ '.  
Niall is stood up when he reads it, and sends a little smirk his way. Thankfully, Louis is too busy staring at the tv screen to see the smirk or the fact that Harry just blatantly texted Niall while in the same room.  
Through all of it, Harry notices that Louis smiles so wide after praise from Niall, even if it is just him saying 'sick shot mate', it makes Harry jealous because he wants to be making the omega happy. Harry can't praise him though, as much as he thinks it, he doesn't want to come across as any more alpha-like than he is right now, and praise will do that. He also notices that Louis falters slightly when Niall says 'shit pass there' then tries harder because he wants to prove his worth, and it's making Harry angrier than it should because he doesn't want the omega to have to try and prove his worth because he is already worth way more than anybody Harry has ever met.  
There isn't much chat between them this time, they're all battling it out until Harry starts to fall back, then Niall does too, and Louis keeps at it, eventually winning and pumping his fist up in the air. He notices the way Louis' scent gives off a brief panic when Niall goes to high five him.  
Harry feels the beginning of a low rumble in his chest, which he thankfully swallows down before anybody hears or feels it. The fact Louis almost cowered away from an open palm can only mean he was abused and Harry's alpha is screaming at him to protect.  
He can't help it when Louis turns round with a huge grin on his face, probably expecting some praise from an _alpha_. And fuck, Harry can't deny his alpha screaming at him, or Louis' waiting gaze, the next few words that slip out of his mouth make the air leave Louis' lungs.

 

_"You did amazing, little one,"_

 

And yeah, it isn't much for normal people but for an omega, a comment like that from an alpha is an amazing. Everyone knows that omegas love praise, and tend to get off at being so much _smaller_ , so getting two in one sentence is a bed of clouds for any omega, from any alpha when unmated, but only their alpha when they are mated.

 

But add that with Louis never receiving any praise from any alpha before, Louis is practically glowing, his face red and his mind is replaying that short sentence over and over.

 

Harry is in the middle of almost panicking however because that is way too alpha of him to say, but he can literally smell how Louis feels and it definitely isn't anything bad, so he just smiles at Louis, who grins back at him. And everything is okay.  
Niall is almost completely oblivious to what just happened, but he wouldn't completely understand anyway because he is a Beta.

 

\--

 

Not long after that happened, Harry's mother had called them down for dinner, and that's where they are, at the table, munching on a full roast dinner. Harry and Louis ended up sat next to each other this time, which was probably Niall's doing, Niall on the other side of Harry and Zayn next to Louis, Liam beside Zayn. Harry can feel his mum's gaze on him every now and again.  
He also realises that Louis stops eating for a while, so he turns to him and whispers,  
"You should eat a little more, love,"  
Louis immediately picks up his knife and fork and starts eating again, in small amounts but he is still eating.  
He is very thankful his mum isn't watching for that though.

 

\--

 

Harry, Louis and Niall all walk up to their rooms together, Niall goes straight inside his and leaving Harry and Louis alone in the little hallway. Harry looks at Louis and he looks a little uneasy. He can't smell it but he can see it.  
"Are you okay?" He asks, cautiously.  
"Yeah, of course," Louis smiles, but it looks kind of fake.  
"Well, I'm not sure I believe you but I wont pry. I'll see you tomorrow Louis, I hope you have a nice night,"  
At that, Louis lifts his head and smiles a little more genuinely.  
"Thank you Harry, I hope you do too... I'm... going to go in now... if that's okay,"  
Harry smiles at him,  
"Of course, little one, get some rest, I'm going to go clean downstairs,"  
Louis goes inside without saying anything else, but smiles at Harry, and Harry is left wondering if he should have called him 'little one' again. He's losing control of his alpha and he won't regret it so long as Louis doesn't mind.

 

\---

 

Louis however, is exhausted. He isn't used to being social at all, he's had a few friends but the friendships never lasted long. And today had been the best day of his life because for once in his life a male alpha has praised him, actually praised him. Be it because of a damn Fifa game matters not. And regardless if said alpha is mated or bonded, he is very proud of himself.  
He quickly opens his notebook and writes  
'You did amazing, little one.'  
'You should eat a little more, love,  
And 'of course little one'  
Because he never thought he would ever be called nice pet names, or praised by a real, male alpha instead of yelled at.  
He writes how happy he is and how he feels, how he wishes his sisters were here and how he wishes so much that Harry hadn't already bonded somebody else. 

 

\--

 

It's about an hour before he decides to go into the en suite and get ready for bed. He makes sure Harry's side is locked before he sees a little package and a piece of card which says 'Louis'.  
He picks up the card and flips it over,  
_Louis,_  
_I'm very sorry about what happened in the kitchen earlier. I will make sure it doesn't happen again. Please take this as a sorry? It's a bubble bar. It smells amazing._  
_All the love, H. xx_  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mated and Bonded basically means the same thing in this fic by the way. Like if an alpha is mated to an omega, they are Bonded.  
> 


	4. warm whispers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> aw so they friends now or

"Fuck, Harry, harder,"  
Harry pounds harder into Louis' tiny little body beneath him, knocking the air out of his lungs with every single thrust. They're sweaty, their scents mixing together and the bed is hitting the wall with each pound, adding to the noise in the room, it's filthy, the sound of them panting and moving together as one.  
"Fuck! Yes, alpha," Louis breathes out, his eyes are screwed up tight, Harry nuzzles into the bonding spot on his neck, licking and sucking, making Louis whimper. His hand snakes around Louis' back and lifts his chest to his, pressing them closer and trapping Louis' dick in between them. The angle change has Harry slamming into Louis' prostate, Louis arches up into Harry from the immense pleasure burning through his body.  
"Shit, Lou, so good for me, so perfect, fuck," Harry reaches his hand down to where his body is joined with Louis'. Louis body tingles all over from the extra sensation of Harry's fingers on his rim,  
"Alpha, knot me, breed me, want your pups, shit,"  
"Fuck, pup, you want that? Get you all round with my babies?"  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Harry, I'm close, fuck," Harry speeds up,  
"Bond me, Harry, please, wanna be yours,"  
"Fuck, cum with me, yeah? Gonna bond you, get you nice and knocked up on my knot, pup, shit,"  
Louis is letting out a constant stream of 'please' and 'alpha'.  
Harry presses his body closer to Louis' and tries to kiss him but they're just breathing into each others mouth, he feels his knot expanding, makes one last thrust to shove his knot inside his omega, making the omega arch his back and cum in between them, and bites down on the bonding spot.

 

 _"Fuck,"_  
Harry wakes up rutting against the bed sheets, he's sweaty and there's a deep rumble in his chest, he's too close to think of stopping now, too close to even think about what his dream meant, regardless, he starts grinding against the bed sheets again, replaying the image in his mind over and over. His lovely, blissed out omega underneath him, how good it felt to pop his knot inside of him, how good it felt to bond him. The growls are a bit louder now, he's got to be quiet because Louis is only next door but his alpha is going crazy.  
He takes a deep breath in, smelling Louis, his hips stutter, moving faster against the bed now, Louis' smell is intoxicating.  
"Shit, fuck,"  
He bites his lip as he feels his knot expanding and presses his hips down _hard_. He pops his knot with a shout of Louis' name, and rolls onto his back, still cumming in his boxers. It's a bit uncomfortable because knots are supposed to be buried in an omega, so he shoves his hands inside his boxers and grips it tight, closing his eyes and imagining it's Louis' ass and not his hand.  
"Fuck, yes," He whispers, rutting up into his hand, spurting more cum and messing up his boxers even more.  
Five minutes later, his body has clearly recognised that he isn't knotting an omega, can't knock up an invisible omega, and stops producing cum and the swell of his knot starts going down, comfortable enough to not have to hold in his hand now.  
He knows now how much he wants Louis. The possibility of what Cara implied edging closer and closer to being reality. He knows he needs to gain Louis' trust before he can even advance any further to being with him, but they're sort of friends, he thinks. Sort of.  
Harry calls him pet names and Louis blushes but that's just due to his Omega-nature. It's just friendly banter to Louis, right? Just lads being lads.

 

He thinks, though, that he wants to get some new shirts, he wonders if Louis needs some new clothes too. He has the initial £1000 of moving to Skylar for Louis on the House Bank Card.  
Everyone gets £1000 when they move here, for a phone for safety, new clothes, decorative bits for their room, paints, whatever they want. Then a monthly allowance. Gemma does the math and bill workings for the house so she'll let Harry know when they've had their allowance. Harry does the shopping, as well as taking everyone shopping, usually in groups of three. They mainly go with Harry because it's safest with him, being alpha and all.  
He wonders if Louis even knows he gets an allowance? Or if he even knows he has the initial moving money. He might Niall to come shopping with Louis this week some time.  
He cleans himself up quickly, glad that it's his week to do the house's laundry and glad he has tissue in his bedside chest of drawers, along with lube and condoms that never get used, but hey, better to be safe than sorry.  
He goes and showers quickly in the en suite, noticing that the bubblebar isn't on the side. He smiles a little, knowing that Louis had it. He hopes he doesn't think he's a creep. I mean, who the fuck apologises with Lush products?  
He can also smell Louis in his room. His smell is stronger in here than in Harrys bedroom. He can't scent anything unusual though, so Harry assumes he's still asleep.  


\--  


Twenty minutes later, Harry downstairs and sat with Gemma, who is the only other person who's awake. She's scrolling through the spreadsheet and making sure everything is on budget.  
"Gems, has that money gone in the bank?" Harry asks. He remembers once when Eleanor got here, she went shopping with Harry straight after she arrived and the money hadn't even gone in the bank. It didn't matter much, because there was money in the bank, but it took Gemma days to get back on track.  
"What money?"  
"Louis'?"  
"Oh, yeah, yesterday I believe. Harry?" Gemma shuts her laptop and looks straight at Harry. Cue awkward eye contact because Harry was basically deepthroating a banana.  
"Man you eat bananas so weird,"  
"Shut up," He laughs.  
"Can I ask you something?"  
"Yeah. It's the answer you might not get,"  
Gemma rolls her eyes dramatically.  
"What's going on with you and Louis?"  
Harry chokes on his banana. (ha ha)  
"Um," Is all he replies.  
"Um? What the fuck does um mean?" Gemma laughs.  
"Shut up, what do you even mean...?"  
Harry decides to play dumb.  
"I'm not fucking stupid Harry."  
"No but seriously why do you even think there's something going on?"  
Gemma stands up and gets an apple, biting into it and staring at Harry. Harry knows she's thinking. Her brows are furrowed a little, eyes extremely focused.  
There's about two meters between them but it feels like she's right up in his face.  
"So, at breakfast yesterday you lost your shit just because Aiden, I believe asked about his heat-"  
So it was Aiden. Harry will keep an eye out for him them.  
"-you didn't come down at lunch yesterday, and considering you bloody made it, that's a bit weird, to be honest mate. Then when you did come down, you looked at Louis for all of half a second. He looked sad the whole dinner time and you basically ran off."  
Louis looked sad? That can only mean Harry triggered something from his past. Fuck. Harry pouts a little.  
"Quit pouting. Anyways, then at dinner, when you _thought_ nobody was looking you whispered something that made him start eating again. What did you even say?"  
Harrys alpha swells with pride. He made the little omega eat. Part of an alphas job is to make sure their mate is healthy. He really shouldn't feel as proud as he does about it because Louis isn't even his mate, but he does.  
"I just said to eat more,"  
"Mhm. Of course you did. Wanna tell me whats been going on then?"  
"Not really,"  
"Why not?"  
"Gemma don't, anyone can hear,"  
"Well we're going to my room then, c'mon, up you get,"  
Harry would argue with her but he knows he'd be fighting a losing battle. Plus she's already picked up her laptop and is walking out the room. Harry sighs. He didn't know Louis looked sad through lunch yesterday. No wonder he rushed off so quick from the kitchen when Harry was cooking. He hopes Louis forgave him a little with the bubblebar. He knows a stupid bubblebar won't have made Louis forgive him completely, but hey, it's a start.

 

\--

 

Gemma's room is simple, similar to his own, minimalistic but homey. He sits down on a black bean bag and lets out a huge sigh. Gemma has already put the radio on quiet, that girl never stops listening to music.  
"So, who've you told?" She throws a blue, fluffy cushion at him from her place on the bed. Harry is genuinely confused, and it's not because he's just been attacked by a blue monster.  
"Told what?" He asks, stretching to pick up the cushion and throws it back at her.  
"That you're majorly crushing on Louis,"  
"F-fuck, what?"  
"Harry, anyone with eyes can see you like him. Your heart eyes are ready to explode whenever he does anything. Literally,"  
"Oh," Harry, at this moment is literally ready to die in shame. Surely Louis must know then. He's only known the boy a day and a bit but he is sure he's head over heels. No other male omegas have had this effect on him. He's only met around five in his lifetime.  
"Harry, come here, please,"  
Harry does so, walking to Gemma and plopping down next to her on the bed. It's soft, she has about a million blankets on it.  
"You do know... like..."  
Harry groans long and hard, burying his face into the bed and hoping to get the point across that he really _doesn't_ want to talk about it.  
"Oi! You little shit, you might be an alpha but I'm still older and you will listen to me!" Gemma looks pissed off, "you know I have never seen you react to anybody like this before. Literally, that shit you pulled at breakfast yesterday was bang out of order, but that wasn't you, that was your alpha, I know. That's what I'm saying. You've never, ever been like that with anyone, yes, you've been annoyed but not alpha toned, I just-"  
"Yes! I know, stop reminding me, I'm a shit human and an even shitter alpha I know," Harry almost yells, as if he doesn't already feel bad about losing control, now he's got Gemma nagging at him.  
"No! Harry, listen, you're neither of them, I just, I, you need to listen okay. I need to make sure that you know what this could mean. That is what I am trying to get across to you," Gemma is picking the fluff off of one of her blankets, her hair is in her face so Harry can't tell what expression she's pulling.  
"Gems, I know," Is all he replies.  
"And what do you think?"  
"Huh?"  
"Do you think it could be?"  
"I don't know. I mean I want to take care of him and make sure he's okay and eats well and has everything he needs, and that's sort of like what I feel for everyone, though. But with him it's different, I can't explain," He sits up and looks at Gemma, "I also want like, you know, other things with him, like the whole package, bonding, kids, the lot. Like, I dont know. I don't know if it's just meeting an omega that is actually attractive to me and male that's making me feel like this, or if it's something... more?"  
"You want my opinion Haz?"  
"You're gonna give it anyway, so yeah,"  
"Damn right I will. I think it's something more. I mean, you've never, ever been this alpha around someone, not in a bad way, I can see it in the way you move, you're ready to pounce on anybody that is willing to try Louis. He won't see it though, don't worry. You've never even thought about going any further than friendship with anybody else you've ever met and you're practically ready to bite Louis' neck whenever you see him, what does that suggest to you?"  
"That all this is dumb, and you need to make breakfast. Gemma, I don't even know if the kid is into guys," He looks down at his hands, rubbing his thumb over his cross tattoo.  
"By the way he looks at you, I'm pretty sure he is,"  
"What?"  
Gemma is already out the door, leaving him in a mound of fluffy blankets and stupid love songs.

 

\---

 

When Louis wakes up, the smell coming from Harry's room is immensely stronger than normal. He doesn't know why, maybe he's in rut? Louis tries to ignore the way his legs go weak at the knees. He feels a bit weird really, in a sense that he shouldn't feel as attached to Harry as he does. He knows he is mated, and straight, maybe bi, but regardless he has Cara. Harry's smell to Louis is calming, almost safety. He doesn't feel as scared in Harry's presence as he does other alphas. Even when he was with Niall and Zayn, Liam still kind of scared him.  
But that's the thing. Why would Harry be different? Maybe it's because he is part of the family that _saved_ Louis, he thinks. But in any case, he still feels a little weird at the fact he craves Harry's attention, praise and... Touch?  
Louis' eyes widen as he realises what he just thought. He burrows himself into the sheets and breathes heavily. The sheets are so comfortable. His second night here was probably better than his first, buried in his covers, in his room, in his home, with Harry's smell lulling him to sleep, and his mind replaying the praise.  
He decides after so long that he should probably go and shower. He vaguely remembers the shower running earlier so he assumes Harry showered then.  
He only showers because it's the morning and who the fuck baths in the morning? That's an evening thing for sure. He wants to use the bath bomb and bubblebar soon. Considering how simple the items are, he shouldn't be as excited as he is to use them.  


\--  


Around half an hour later, Louis is toying with his hair, messing with his long fringe and getting it to flip across his forehead perfectly. He's dressed in his favourite sweater, it's old now, but he loves it all the same, it's not too warm for the summer day they're in.  
He hears a soft knock at the door.  
"Um... Come in?"  
"Hey, how are you?"  
It's Zayn, his hair looks better when it's up, Louis thinks briefly.  
"I'm... Good? Thanks?"  
Zayn nods, Louis realises a moment too late that he forgot to ask how Zayn was, too.  
"You need to get some stuff for this room, aha, anyway, Gemma made breakfast, it's almost ready. Harry sent me up to get you,"  
"Oh? Okay,"  
Louis furrows his brows a little. Why didn't Harry just come and get him, himself? Why send Zayn? He likes Zayn, yeah, but he would have much preferred Harry. Unless Harry really was in rut?  
"Come on then, we'll go down together, if you want? If you're ready I mean,"  
"Wha- Yeah, of course, let's go,"

 

Louis enters the dining room with Zayn, seeing about half the housemates are already here.  
"Hey Lou!" He hears Niall shout, which makes Louis cringe a little, but nobody seems to notice, so he just carries on and walks to the table and sits next to Niall. He can't see Harry, so he must be in rut then, probably at Cara's. Just the thought of Harry spending his rut at Cara's is making him feel physically sick. Louis is technically not even a full omega yet, can't really handle what Harry would have to give to him(his breathing picks up a little thinking about that) and he's technically not even the right gender for Harry, but hey, he can dream can't he?

 

He watches the conversation at the table as everyone else comes down. Liam's here today, as well as a girl called Perrie, who's talking to Niall. He likes her, she seems nice. There's a girl called Eleanor who is talking to a boy called Max, two boys called Nick and Aiden, who he recognises as the ones that asked him the questions the other day that Harry shouted at. Three more girls come into the dining room, called Jade, Leigh, and Jesy. They start talking to Perrie when they sit down. Louis thinks he's done well to memorise all of the names, because this is only his fourth meal with them.  
Niall starts talking to him when Perrie gets distracted.  
"How'd you sleep?"  
"Good, thanks, how about you?" Louis likes Niall the most, he thinks. He also likes Zayn. Liam scares him a bit because he is an alpha but he seems okay.  
"I sleep like a rock every night,"  
"True that," Zayn butts in, "I could barely wake him up this morning,"  
"None of us can, I swear he goes in to hibernation," Liam laughs.  
Louis laughs along with them and actually joins in the conversation, and yeah, he thinks that this is the group of friends he wants, even though it's also Harry's group, but Harry is probably at Cara's a lot, like Liam is with his girlfriend.

 

"Breakfast is served!" Gemma comes in from the kitchen holding a tray of food, bacon, eggs, toast etc. She puts it down in the middle of the table and sits down, helping herself and smiling as everyone compliments her.  
Louis only gets some beans and toast and bacon. He's really not that hungry.  
"Sorry we're late," comes Anne's voice from the door, Louis' head snaps up, and watches as Anne and _Harry_ sit at the table.  
"Harry wouldn't stop petting a cat on the way back,"  
Louis smiles a bit and Harry looks straight at him from the other side of the table.  
"It was cute," He grins, staring at Louis and Louis has to look down to hide the blush.  
"Did you get milk? I'm dying for a cuppa," Max says,  
"Yeah, we did, I swear that store gets worse by the day." Anne replies.  
"Which one did you go?"  
"Just the one up near the park," Harry replies to them this time, standing up and putting some food on his plate.  
"I was gonna say, your car was still in the driveway,"  
"Yeah, we walked,"

 

So Harry isn't in rut then? But then why would he smell stronger this morning? He looks good today, like every day, but today he seems less tense, and refreshed. Louis is relieved that he isn't in rut, and isn't at Cara's for said rut. He can't hate Cara, but, he gets a little sad when he thinks of her name. Well, he gets a little sad when he pictures her and Harry together.  
He doesn't eat any more. Niall notices and asks him if he's okay. Which, yes, of course he is. He just doesn't feel like eating. Maybe it's habit.  
People start leaving the dinner table. Gemma and Anne have started taking the main plates of people that have left. It's only him, Harry and Niall left.

 

\---

 

Harry puts down his knife and fork, he's so full. Gemma's breakfasts are the best, to be honest. He hasn't seen Louis eat a thing.  
"How come you're not eating, Louis?" Harry asks.  
"I, I already ate some?" It sounds like a question, not an answer. Harry decides that if he wants to spend his money today then he will treat him to lunch.  
"Hmm. Louis, do you know about your money?"  
"I don-I don't have any," Harry watches as he looks down at his lap, he looks embarrassed. Harry wants to scoop him up and buy him everything he will ever need and everything he ever wants.  
"You get a thousand quid when you move here, love,"  
Harry notices Niall look up at Harry then. Probably at the nickname, even though he was there when he called him little one.  
"What?" Louis looks up then, eyes wide and disbelieving.  
Niall backs him up then.  
"A thousand when you move here for a phone, room décor and clothes, yeah,"  
"Wow, really?" Louis sounds amazed, looking between the both of them.  
"Yep. Then you get a monthly allowance,"  
"Wow," Is all Louis manages to say.  
"You want to go shopping today? I'm not busy, and the money is in the bank,"  
"I mean, i-if that's okay?" Louis looks brighter, his eyes actually look happy.  
"Of course, I think Liam wanted a lift to town, anyway, are you going with Liam or is Zayn?" He asks Niall.  
"I am, today,"  
"Sick. We'll go at eleven then. I'll get you all, if that's alright with you Louis? Would you rather Zayn come as well? It'll just be me and you shopping. Liam has a dentist appointment."  
"No, yeah, I'm fine with that, if you are," Louis looks shy. Harry doesn't want Louis to be scared of him.  
They all end up going up to their bedrooms, well Harry goes and sits on his balcony. He hopes today will help him and Louis get a little closer, help Harry's alpha calm down a little, and Louis' omega get used to his alpha, and for Louis to get used to Harry. He thinks back to his dream and gets a little hot, but he's just thinking about how much he would actually like to see Louis like that, beneath him, sweaty, glassy eyes, wrecked from Harry and only Harry. He feels like such a creep but he can't help it. He doesn't just want him for sex, and to knot, and to bite. He wants to take care of him, hold him when he's going sleep, hold him if he has a bad dream, hold him all the time. He wants to protect him from his past and anything bad that could happen in the future. He wants to give him the world, wants to see the world with Louis beside him. He wants to give this boy everything he deserves.  
And Louis is really, _really_ pretty. He's got lovely blue eyes, sharp features and a body any omega would die for. He's got a tiny waist, thick thighs and a big bum, (Harry is a sucker for a big bum), he's got long eyelashes and cheekbones. And he's so _small_ and Harry's in too deep.  
He's staring out at the field. In two weeks time is their autumn campout, the ones that want to camp in some tents on the fields at the back, the ones that Harry is looking at now. It's a sense of freedom for them, they're not too far from safety but they're far enough to feel free. They do it four times a year, when the seasons change. It's optional, nobody has to do it if they don't want to. Liam usually brings Sophia, Cara comes and brings Lydia, etc. There's a campfire and marshmallows and comfy, warm tents. It's lovely. He wonders if Louis will come this year. It would be nice to see him enjoying himself.  
Harry also wonders about Louis' past. Is he actually scared of Harry? Or just general alphas. Is it just people he doesn't know? Why is he scared. Harry wants to know everything. Wants to make it better for the small omega.

 

 

\---

 

 

Louis is sat in the front seat of Harry's car. The car looks expensive, inside and out. He left his sweater at home because it's boiling in the middle of the day, especially when out and about. He keeps sneaking glances at Harry, the way his hands look on the steering wheel, the contrast of his skin and the car interior, how concentrated he is, how his hair blowing in the slight breeze. He's so hot. Louis wishes he got sent to Skylar sooner, maybe he would have got Harry before Cara. Niall and Liam are chatting in the back seat, about Sophia, who Louis knows as Liam's Omega. He isn't really listening to them, anyway.  
There are a lot of fields on the way to town Louis notices, too. It isn't until the buildings become regular that Harry speaks up.  
"Is there anything you want? Anywhere you want to go?"  
"Erm, not really? I don't know,"  
"Louis, I hate to ask this, but have you ever like, been proper shopping before?"  
Louis feels his face flare up, because no, he _hasn't_ because his step-dad hated him, and even though his sisters would get him stuff when out shopping, he was never allowed to go. His step-dad said he didn't deserve to, probably wouldn't find clothes to fit him anyway. Louis is self conscious about his weight because of his step-dad. He always said he was fat, that nobody would ever love him, no male, no female, no alpha or beta, not even another omega. And Louis believed him. Believes him.  
Louis shakes his head, no, not meeting Harry's eyes and looking straight down at his hands.  
"That's fine. You'll love it, little one,"  
He watches as Harry reaches his hand over and rests it on Louis leg, near his knee. Louis' breathing picks up a little because this is a _kind_ gesture and he doesn't know if Harry will hurt him in a minute. He stares at the hand on his leg until Harry moves it to turn his turn signal on.  
Louis looks up at him then, and Harry looks back and smiles, and heck, Louis can't help but smile back.

\-- 

Once they've parked, and Niall and Liam have gone their separate way, Harry starts walking with Louis beside him. It's a bit busy in town, but it's a Sunday so most people are just nipping to get their food for Sunday Roast dinner.  
"So I was thinking of going to the Apple store first, and getting you a phone?"  
"Um, sure?"  
"Then we can get some lunch, and you can actually eat something, love,"  
"I d-"  
"-sh, you need to eat something anyway and there's a lovely pizza place I want to go again anyway,"  
"Okay,"  
Harry puts his hand on Louis' lower back, guiding and protective. It makes Louis weak. He shouldn't be this comfortable with it but he is.  
"Is this okay?"  
Louis nods his head, trying not to think of the fact that Harry's hand is covering almost the whole span of his lower back.  
"Good,"

 

"Hi! Welcome to the apple store. How many we help?" 

It's an alpha that says it and Louis moves closer to Harry.  
"We're just browsing at the minute, thanks," Harry says, pulling Louis closer.  
Louis gets the same phone as Harry has, he's never had a phone before, so he's excited to get home ( _home_!!) and try it. He tells Harry that he might need some help with it, how to work it etc, and Harry tells him that it's okay because he has to put his phone number in it anyway. Harry helps him choose a phone case and a screen protector, telling him its better to be safe than sorry.  
They go to the pizza place afterwards and Louis is a bit nervous about eating, but he feels better with just Harry, than in front of everyone in the house. Harry's pizza is covered in vegetables and Louis' is just cheese and tomato, they share some fries. Harry doesn't stare at him, even gives Louis a slice of his own pizza, and Louis gives Harry a slice of his.

Louis wonders what Harry thinks of him, because the way he treats him isn't like pity. Louis knows what being pitied feels like. It sort of feels like Harry wants to do this, but Louis cant help but tell himself that this is how Harry treats everyone, it's his job, right? It's just his job to make people feel at home.  
"So what do you want your room to look like?" Harry says and they end up discussing that and Harry tells Louis what shops they should go in for each of the things he wants. Louis feels a bit weird telling Harry he wants fairylights, pink ones, but Harry doesn't react badly, he smiles even. 

Harry doesn't ask anything intrusive, nothing about his past, nothing about being omega, nothing about why he doesn't eat much. He's thankful for this, but, he thinks, if it came to it, he would probably tell Harry if he asked anyway.  
Louis tries not to think about how _right_ it feels to be with Harry.  
Harry insists on paying for both of their pizzas, the fries and the drinks.

It feels like being taken care of. Louis isn't even used to eating out, let alone someone else paying for him to eat.

 

They go clothes shopping next, Harry has Louis get measured, which Louis is nervous about because he feels _huge_ but Harry is smiling at him when he is getting measured and Louis doesn't think his nerves matter that much anymore. There are some lovely clothes. Harry keeps recommending things to him, a sweater, some jeans, some sweats and vans etc. Louis gets everything Harry suggests. (Maybe because he wants to look good for Harry.)  
"You'd look cute in that one," and "These would suit you, love," stay in Louis' mind.  
It's a little awkward when Louis gets comfy lacy panties as well as boxers, but it doesn't feel like Harry is judging him, so that's okay.  
They go B &Q for Louis' room. He gets some fairy lights, some cushions, a night light and a desk lamp. He gets some other stuff for his desk too, like a pencil holder and some little draws to have on his desk.  
Harry suggests after this that they go back to the car and put the things that they've bought in the boot, to make sure they can actually carry everything, they already have so much, Harry insists on carrying most of it, only letting Louis carry the light stuff, like the cushions and the lighter clothes.

 

Once they're back out of the car park and in the centre again they go into an art shop to get him some pencils and a sketchbook, different sorts of art-y items, since Louis has mentioned he liked to doodle.  
They go into another shop and get some bed sheets, and a blanket or two. He gets some DVD's to play on the TV in his room. He gets some pens and a notepad, as well as a vanilla air freshener. Vanilla always calms him down. He gets some photo frames and Harry even suggests getting a polaroid camera. Which he does. It's not that cheap, probably around £70 but when Harry is showing him how to use it when they're on a bench, he wraps an arm around Louis (which Louis melts into) and snaps a picture of the two of them. Harry leaves his arm around Louis while they wait for it to develop, his fingers are slowly stroking his arm, and Louis loves it. Harry takes a photo of it on his phone and Louis puts it in his pocket, and checks it's still there every couple of minutes.  
They decide it's too late to get back in time for dinner. Liam had texted Harry saying Niall and him had caught the bus back to Skylar.  
"Do you want something proper to eat or just a takeout?"  
"Um, it's up to you?" Harry smiles for a moment, then asks,  
"Are you sure? You can choose if you want,"  
"I'm sure, you choose,"  
So Harry chooses takeout, saying he isn't too hungry and is bored of being around people.  
(Louis doesn't realise it was just Harry's alpha being possessive, and was sick of Louis being around so many people. Harry's alpha was being selfish.)  
They drive with Harry's music on ([x](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omWI4e5YZB8) [x](https://youtu.be/Loj4sqH7b4k) [x](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhuIvEW1yvo)) then Harry parks up outside a row of shops. He remembers that these aren't too far from Skylar, so they must be at the shops Harry and Anne went earlier. Louis watches as Harry gets out the drivers side and walks over to his side, opening the door and letting Louis step out. Louis feels Harry put his arm on his back again. It feels like he belongs. He likes it.  
"Anything you want? I'm just getting chips,"  
"Um, yeah, just chips, and maybe some ketchup, if that's okay?"  
"Of course, little one,"  
They're waiting in the line for the chip shop when Louis shivers. It's summer, but it's nearing autumn, the temperature starts dropping at around 5pm. Louis only has a t-shirt on. It's chilly.  
"Are you cold?" Harry says, almost immediately.  
"What?" Louis says, not wanting to answer, really.  
"You just shivered, are you cold?"  
Louis doesn't even have the time to answer before Harry is pulling his own sweater over his head and giving it to Louis.  
"Wh-are you sure? I don't mind," Louis is on cloud nine, he's sure. He's never had an alpha share clothes with him.  
"Positive. I'm not cold," Harry grins wolfishly and Louis smiles back, shrugging the sweater over his head. It's _huge_ on him. He's got sweater paws and the sweater literally comes down to just above his knees, and it's so _warm_ and it smells so _good_. Well, it smells like Harry to be honest. And the way Harry is looking at him makes him feel all fuzzy. He wants to _live_ in this damn sweater.  
Harry fixes up the hood for him and then puts his arm back around, resting his hand on his waist instead of his back this time.  
"Next!"  
Harry's arm doesn't leave his waist whilst he orders, even when he hands the money over and takes the bag with the chips and ketchup in.  
"So the parks just over this road, you wanna eat in the car or on the park?"  
"I haven't been to a park since I was three, I think," Louis says.  
"Park it is then, are you warm enough?"  
"Yeah, thanks. Are you?"  
"I'm good, love, don't you worry your pretty little head,"  
Louis looks down at that, with a blush and a smile. He knows Harry isn't flirting but it won't hurt to imagine, and besides, he's just not used to compliments, he's allowed to get shy.  
"Can we get the camera from the car, though? I want to take some pictures on the park," Louis is grinning, excited.  
"Of course, love,"  
And so five minutes later, they're sat on the roundabout, Harry is spinning it slowly, every now and again with the foot that is poking out the side of it. The chips are in the middle of the roundabout and Louis is leaning against one of the poles and munching quietly.  
The chips are almost gone when Harry speaks up.  
"Louis, can I ask you something? You don't have to go into detail, you don't even have to answer if you don't want to,"  
"Um, yeah? Okay,"  
"Are you scared of me?"  
The question throws Louis off guard. He was expecting a more intrusive question, about his past, or his non existent heats.  
"I don't think I am," It feels weird saying it, feels weird admitting it, because he's so used to being scared of everyone, especially alphas. He continues, "I don't think I have, a, a reason to? If that makes sense? Because, because, like, you've been nicer to me in the past few days than anybody else has been, like, ever,"  
"Oh," Harry says, "Louis, one more question?"  
"Yeah?" _'Here comes the question about my past'_ he thinks.  
"Can I hug you?"  
Louis looks up at that, eyes questioning, but the sincerity in Harry's eyes make him believe him. And it doesn't feel like pity, like it did with his mum or his sisters.  
"Yeah, if-if you want, yeah,"  
Harry gets up off the roundabout then, and walks over to Louis, pulling him up softly by his hand and straight into a hug.

 

 _And they fit_.

 

They fit so, so perfectly.  
Louis has his arms around Harry's middle and Harry has his wrapped around Louis' shoulders. Louis has his face pressed into Harrys chest and Harrys face is pressed into Louis hair.  
Louis breaths in deeply, inhaling the alphas scent.  
It just feels _right_.  
Harry squeezes tighter, nuzzling into his hair, before letting go and holding Louis' shoulders at arms length. He's smiling as he says 'thank you' and Louis isn't really sure what Harry is saying thank you for but he doesn't reply.  
"You want to go on the swings?" Harry asks, slowly, putting the empty chip packet in the bin.  
They go on the swings, Louis hasn't felt this free in his life, he's swinging fast and high, closing his eyes and giggling. Harry gets off his swing and takes a polaroid of Louis on the swings, and Louis takes one of Harry on the slide, and then they take a selfie on Harrys phone when they go down the slide together. Louis fails at the monkey bars, whereas Harry zooms across them, but when Louis climbs through the metal grates. Harry struggles to follow because of his 'giraffe limbs'. Louis giggles a lot with Harry, he realises. And when he loses Harry in the metal grates he comes out the other side, and it turns out Harry is waiting on the other side and tickles his sides until he's crying of laughter. Harry takes a snapchat of Louis when he's on the swinging tire rope thing, then joins him. They're sort of laying next to each other, so Louis asks if he can take a photo of them both, which Harry agreed to.  
Harry takes a picture on his phone of the polaroid and then records a snapchats the sky as they're swinging back and forth.  
"Harry, what's a snapchat?"  
"I'll set one up with you tomorrow if you want?"  
"Yeah. Okay,"  
"We should probably get back? What do you think?"  
"Yeah, what's the time?"  
"Ten,"  
"Oh,"  
Neither of them make a move.  
"Th-thank you for today, Harry,"  
"That's quite alright, kitten,"  
Louis blushes for what seems like the billionth time today.  
"I had fun, too," Harry says, and Louis beams at that.  
"Come on, little one, mum will start calling soon,"  
Harry gets up and puts his hand up to stop the swing. Louis panics, thinking Harry is going to hit him. Logically he knows he probably won't, but he can never be too cautious. He only realises that Harry notices when Harry helps him out the swing with a worried face and hugs him again, whispering that he's sorry. And Louis is shaking a little because nobody usually notices when he panics. He's usually good at hiding it, but he lets Harry hug him anyway.

\-- 

They get home about ten minutes after the hug, and Harry and Louis take all the bags up to Louis' bedroom.  
On the final trip up with the bags, Anne comes out of her room.  
"Have fun boys?"  
"Yes thank you," Louis smiles,  
"Good, I'm glad, I'm going to bed now so I'll see you tomorrow, goodnight,"  
Louis watches as Harry puts down the bags and hugs his mum. For a moment he misses his own mother but then he remembers the hugs he got from Harry earlier and everything is okay.

 

They put the iPhone on charge when they get all the bags up to Louis' room. Harry helps Louis put his clothes away, set up the desk lamp and the stationary in the desk draw, he helps put the fairylights where Louis can't reach. Harry fetches some blue-tac and helps Louis put up the pictures he took today, helps him put the DVD's on the shelf.  
"Do you like the smell of the bubblebar?"  
"Y-yeah. It's really nice, thank you,"  
Harry smiles widely.  
"Come on then, I think that's everything? Let's set your phone up,"  
"Okay," Louis says as he sits on the bed.  
Harry grabs a piece of paper and a pen, which he says is for passwords, turning the light off and the fairylights on. It's light enough like this, not too bright, but light enough to see what you're doing.  
Louis listens as Harry explains how to use things, as he puts his phone number in, telling him that he'll put everyone else's in tomorrow. Louis doesn't think he minds just having Harry's number. He watches as Harry shows him how to send him a message. Louis watches as Harry sets up a snapchat for him, and an instagram, following himself on both. When he gives Louis the phone back to play and get used to for a bit, Louis gets a notification on snapchat and instagram saying Harry had followed and added him back. He presses Harrys name on snapchat and watches the videos from earlier in the day, smiling.  
The boy in the frame doesn't even look like him. He looks _happy_. Something he has pretty much been incapable of doing since he was little. He goes onto the Camera app next. He looks at Harry, who gets the idea of what he is trying to say without words and moves closer, pulling a funny face as Louis takes the picture. Louis finds the 'Set as wallpaper' button on his own, and sets it proudly.  
"Aw. Aren't you cute, I'll tell you what," Louis watches as Harry changes his wallpaper to the one of him and Harry on the slide from earlier. Louis grins.  
"Thank you again for today,"  
"No need to thank, you should get some sleep now, love, it's been a long day,"  
Louis nods and smiles, knowing he's right.  
"I'm going to clean the kitchen, then I'm going to be going bed, so the bathroom is yours for a bit," Harry stands up and stretches.  
"Okay, goodnight Harry,"  
"Can I hug you again?" Harry asks.  
Louis stands up, not answering and pushes himself against Harry's chest again, wrapping his arms around his middle.  
"Goodnight Lou, sleep well,"  
"Night Harry,"  
Louis feels Harry kiss his hair, and smiles into his chest, then pulls away.  
"See you tomorrow little one,"  
Louis doesn't reply, watching as Harry leaves the room and shuts his door gently.  
It isn't until after he's done in the bathroom that he realises he's still drowning in Harry's sweater.  
He slips out of it, putting it on the bed, then takes his other clothes off, putting on a pair of new comfy panties and pulling the sweater back over head. He looks in the full size mirror. He feels cute, and small and lovely, so he gets in bed with it on.  
He checks his phone before he puts it on charge next to him.

 

**Harry :)**  
_Goodnight, Lou. xx_

 

He goes sleep happier than he has ever been that night, wrapped in Harry's sweater and drowning in Harry's smell, regardless of whether Harry is taken.


	5. i was wrong, i know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so things are being revealed  
> sorta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (strongly recommend reading the end notes)

Harry's balcony is peaceful, very peaceful. There are birds chirping in the early hours of the morning. The sun shines into the field just beyond the back garden, casting it in a warm light, all year round. Summer into Autumn is Harry's favourite, though. How it is now, with tiny dew drops glinting in the morning rays as the wind sways the grass it's resting on just slightly.  
It's chilly in the mornings, a fresh chill the the air, slight breeze wrapping itself around everything.  
This is what Harry loves.  
The beauty of nature in it's simplicity.

Harry's mind slowly ticks over to thoughts of Louis, the small boy never being far from his mind, and it's not difficult for Harry to put 'Louis' and 'Beauty' together. He wonders how Louis would look on the balcony with him. Wrapped up in his arms while they're lounging on the sofa. Louis burrowing closer because the chill of the breeze is just a slight bit too cold or just because Harry's chest is inviting and protective or just because it smells like Harry and that's the only breath of fresh air that Louis needs.

He wonders if Louis would appreciate the beauty that Harry sees in the view, wonders if he himself would, even with his arms wrapped around the small omega, his definition of beauty and perfection. He wonders if Louis would even like to do that with him, to cuddle with him, kiss him, let himself go and let Harry protect him. God, Harry hopes Louis would like him back because he is _gone_ for the little one.

Harry doesn't stay on his balcony for long, just wanting some fresh air to wake up before he starts the day. He's up earlier today, wanting to go for a jog. He wanders back into his room and into the bathroom to shower, stretching and taking a deep breath in when he smells fear and sadness in the air. It's coming from Louis' room. Harry panics, does he go in? Is he allowed? Will that scare him? His alpha is on full alert as he rushes out of the bathroom and his room, and to Louis' actual entrance, it's probably better entering from the normal entrance, not the bathroom entrance, Harry thinks.

He stands contemplating whether he should knock for a few moments when the smell gets stronger, and Harry can't control his alpha, has to go in and make sure Louis is okay. He opens the door slowly and there is Louis, turning and flailing in his sleep, buried in Harry's jumper from yesterday, small 'no's falling from his lips.

\---

_Nobody will ever love you._  
_You're going to be alone forever._  
_Stupid, worthless omega._  
_You're a waste of space, take up too much room with your fat._  
_**You are a disgrace.** _

Louis can't tell where the voices are coming from, or why they're telling him things he already knows. He can't tell why the voices sound like his dad and his stepdad, can't tell why they keep telling him these things, he _knows_ he is. He knows he's fat and gross and he knows nobody will love him, knows it's impossible to love someone like him. He knows he is a disgrace.

He can hear another alpha though and he doesn't recognise the voice and it's not yelling at him or being mean it's just saying his name over and over and Louis wants to focus on it but he can't because his head is swimming with horrible voices. He tries anyway, tuning in on the soft alpha voice, trying to find out where it comes from and who is saying his name.

A few moments later he feels a hand, a warm hand on his shoulder and it's not hurting him, it's not how alphas usually touch him. His senses are being invaded with an alpha, a kind one. He can smell it, hear it, feel it. He wants to open his eyes because he's scared to, scared to ruin it if it's a dream.

"Louis, c'mon, wake up for me, love,"

He frowns at that, eyebrows furrowing in confusion, because, hey, isn't that Harry's voice? It takes him a few more moments to realise the smell that's enveloping him is Harry's too, which means the hand must be as well and so he opens his eyes slowly, staring at the alpha who's looking at him with worry in his eyes.

"Sorry," Louis croaks out. He feels bad for waking the alpha, for wasting his time. He can feel tears drying on his cheeks, probably leaving ugly tear tracks. He's scared the alpha will turn on him, hurt him for waking him up, better to apologise now, just in case.  
"What?" Is what Harry ends up saying, Louis can see his arm moving and can tell he's lifting his hand up. Is he going to get hit? It's moving way too slowly to be getting ready to hit him. He doesn't answer, just watches as Harry lifts his hand up so _so_ slowly, up to Louis' face. He can't look at it now, so looks down, looking at his own arm, where its covered in Harrys jumper. He feels himself blush at the fact Harry has caught him sleeping in his jumper.  
He stops breathing when Harry's thumb brushes gently over his right cheek, wiping away the tears that are still there, doesn't start breathing while Harry moves his hand slowly over to the other side of his face and using his thumb again to wipe the tears away there, too.

"Are you okay?" Harry whispers, probably not to startle the younger boy. Louis nods, he wants to say no, because he's really not okay, but Harry is here and Louis doesn't want to waste his time.  
"Are you sure?" Louis nods again, now looking up at Harry's face and into his eyes.  
"Are you still tired?" Louis shakes his head, no. He is, he wants to sleep for days but he's scared that if he goes back to sleep he will have the same nightmare and Harry won't make sure he's okay again.  
"Okay, do you want to come on a walk with me? I was going to go on a jog but we can go on a walk if you want?"  
"If-if you don't mind."  
Louis wants to get to know the area, doesn't want to be confined to the house. He also wants to stay with Harry, and Harry offered for him to come with him, so hey, maybe he should. Fresh air always helps after a nightmare.  
Harry smiles warmly at that, pinching Louis' cheek a little.  
"Sweet, I'm going to shower and get ready, do you want to shower first?"  
"You can, if you want,"  
Harry nods, standing up slowly.  
"I'll go first, won't be long, I'll knock on the bathroom door when I'm done? Then you can go, knock on my actual door when you're ready?"  
"Okay,"  
"The jumper looks really good on you by the way, kitten." Harry says nonchalantly as he walks out the room.  
Louis blushes furiously, smiling so hard he thinks his face is going to split.

Louis' at war with himself, really. There are always a million ' _what ifs?_ ' running through his brain about everyone. But Harry has a million more what ifs.  
What if Harry hates male omegas and he's only being kind because it's his job to? What if he only pity's Louis, and that's why he's being all nice. What if he's only taking the piss when he calls Louis nicknames?  
Who knows?

He's at war with his omega, a war between Nature and Nurture. His nature means he's born to submit, to please and to be with an alpha. His nurture has taught him that no alphas so far have been pleased with him, simply because of his gender and status. His nurture has taught him to not trust an alpha, to avoid them and follow instructions blindly. His nature teaches him let himself be taken care of by an alpha, his nurture has taught him nobody is willing to do that for him, not alpha, not beta, not omega. His nurture has taught him to be his own carer, to not trust a single person. Anybody could have dark intentions.  
But Louis feels safe with Harry, so, so safe and Louis thinks there's got to be more than Harry's job title that makes him feel that way. He puts it down to just his emotions getting used to new experiences and new kinds of people because he's also enthralled by Niall, but only in how confident he is. With Harry it's different, he wants to be taken care of by him and wants to give Harry everything he wants and he wants to _kiss_ Harry and he wants Harry to kiss him back and he's never felt so safe to admit that. It just sucks, for Louis because the one time he does feel safe enough to admit it, he can't act on it.

\---

 

Harry is looking forward to the walk, it's still really early in the morning, still a chill in the air, sun still slowly rising. He's laying on his bed, waiting for Louis to knock on the door. The shower went off ten minutes ago, so it shouldn't be long.

Five minutes of playing on 1010 he hears a timid few knocks on his door, followed by a cute 'Harry?'.  
"Just a moment," Harry calls, jumping up and shoving his phone, wallet and keys into his pockets and grabbing a coat. He opens the door while he's shrugging his coat over his shoulders.  
"Morning," Harry smiles once he's pulled his coat on.  
"Hello," Louis says back, he looks tired.  
"Are you sure you want to come with me? You can go sleep if you need to,"  
"I'm sure, I'm fine,"  
Harry raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything. They walk down the three sets of stairs together, quietly. Nobody else in the house should be awake and Harry doesn't fancy waking anybody up. After nipping into the kitchen and grabbing two water bottles and two apples he reappears in the hallway where he left Louis.  
Louis smiles when he gives him the water and fruit, thanking him quietly.

It's a few minutes of walking and eating their apples before either of them speak.  
"Do you want to talk about what happened earlier? You don't have to, but it would be good to know what happens so I can help you in the future if you need me to, little one,''  
Harry sees Louis' step falter slightly before he's talking slowly and quietly.  
"I don't know if I can,"  
"Why do you think that?" He wants Louis to feel as though he can say or do anything around Harry, wants him to feel safe and free and loved.  
"Because I'm- I'm kind of used to it you know? I think- I thought they'd go once I got here but, like, obviously not? I don't know, I'm sorry,"  
"You don't have a reason to be sorry, is it like a nightmare, of sorts?"  
"I don't know. It's just, like, it's just voices and they're just saying horrible things and I know they're true but the just keep on doing it. They keep on telling me and I know they're true, I know they're right, I ju-"  
"-hey, stop that," Harry cuts in because he can see that Louis is getting himself worked up, can see that Louis is about to break down again, "you don't need to tell me about it if you don't want to, is it okay to hug you?"  
Louis nods his head letting a few tears drop and Harry pulls him right in for a hug. He lets Louis cry on him for a while, can feel his choked off breathing and his body trembling. He knows Louis needs some love. He starts gently stroking through the ends of Louis hair, let's Louis bury his head that tiny bit further into his chest.  
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry,"  
Harry shushes him and tightens his arms around his tiny frame. A new wave of tears crashes over Louis, and Harry finds himself rocking slightly to comfort the smaller boy, whispering things to him like _'it's okay,' 'you're okay,' 'you can cry all you need to,' and 'get it all out,'_.  
Harry's heart is breaking at Louis being this upset. He wants to hold him tight forever and a day to make sure he's okay and he wants to hug him so tight that anywhere Louis feels he has broken pieces, they'll fit back together. Harry isn't usually a violent person but he thinks he could kill whoever did something to make the tiny boy react like this.

When Louis pulls away he wipes his face from all the tears and looks guilty at Harry's coat, which has got tear stains all down the front.  
"S-sorry about your coat,"  
"That's okay little one. Coats are designed to get wet, got it all out?"  
"I don't think I could cry a-anymore if I tried,"  
"C'mon we'll walk to the park again, and talk about whatever is bothering you. If you want to that is, you're not obligated to tell me under any circumstance,"  
"Okay."

Harry ends up telling Louis to drink some water before they set off again, in the direction of the park. They don't talk about what just happened, just small talk until they get to the park.

\---

 _Maybe Harry is the one for me but I'm not the one for him_ Louis thinks. It's the only thing he can put his feelings down to, the reason he's unreasonably jealous of Harry and Cara, the reason Harry comforts him so much even after all the years he's been petrified of alphas. It's happened before, to other alphas and omegas, it can't be helped.  
Louis thinks that maybe he should distance himself from Harry. Maybe get used to being completely alone, without the support of an alpha who he can't have for himself. But even just the thought of distancing himself from Harry makes his head spin. He's almost like a drug that he's dependent on.

They're sat on the roundabout again, not having to worry about any kids. It's too early. Harry is gently pushing it round with his foot on the ground and they're not speaking, Louis doesn't know if he should or not.  
"Do you want to tell me anything, Louis?"  
_Yes, I do, I want to tell you everything but I don't want you to pity me I want you to love me and not be swayed in your decision by my past._  
"No." Louis looks down in shame. He shouldn't be so defensive around an alpha. He shouldn't have to say no for fear or pity, shouldn't be scared that Harry will hurt him when he does say 'no'.  
"You can if you want, lovely. I won't judge you. If you change your mind you know where to find me, yeah?"  
"Yeah,"  
There's a silence in the air after that. It's not awkward, it's comfortable.  
"We have this like, camp out thing that we do, where we stay in the field out back, and I was wondering, like, do you want to come? You don't have to, I mean, not everyone does, but it's fun, you know?"  
Louis looks at Harry and he looks bashful.  
"Who, um, usually goes?"  
"Well, me, Niall, Zayn, Liam and Sophia, Cara, Lydia, all of the girls except Eleanor, Nick and Aiden don't usually, Max doesn't either,"  
Louis has no clue who Lydia is. Perhaps a family friend. He's not sure he wants to go if Cara is going to be there. Probably cuddling up to Harry and Louis will be embarrassed and alone. Zayn will be with Niall, Liam with Sophia, Harry with Cara, he'd probably end up with Lydia.  
"I-I don't know,"  
"Mind me asking why?"  
"I just, I don't like the cold," It's not exactly a lie. Louis hates feeling cold.  
"Oh," Louis can't read the emotion in Harry's voice, and mistakes it for anger and scrambles to stand up and get away from him before he hurts him. Louis should know better than to refuse an alphas offer.  
"Hey, hey, what's wrong?" Harry looks panicked and Louis is trying his hardest to not give off his own panicked scent.  
"I-I'm sorry, please don't hurt me," Louis knows begging won't help. Never has in the past, anyway.  
"What?" Harry spits out. Begging was definitely the wrong thing to do.  
"Sorry, sorry," He squeaks when Harry stands up.  
"I'm not going to hurt you, kitten."  
Louis feels himself calm down slightly at how soft Harrys voice is and the nickname. He's so _scared_ at the moment, though.  
What if Harry is just getting Louis to trust him and then going to hurt him? What if he's serious and Louis looks stupid because he's so scared?  
"It's okay, I won't hurt you."  
Harry steps closer then, and Louis steps back.  
"Do you want me to call Niall to come? Or Zayn? You don't have to come near me if you don't want to, I won't come any closer,"  
Louis nods, wanting someone who isn't an alpha. He doesn't let his guard down while Harry calls Niall and calmly explains the situation to him. Louis feels bad because Niall loves his sleep but he doesn't know what else to do. He's too scared to let Harry closer, it's not even Harry that he's scared of, it's the alpha within him that he's scared of, no matter how much his omega is _screaming_ at him to submit and let the alpha close.

Louis stays where he is, Harry goes and sits on a bench where he can see Louis, but only glances up every few minutes to make sure he's still there, mainly just staring at his feet. Louis wishes he could know what Harry is thinking.  
Niall arrives after a while, smiling at the both of them.  
"Morning!" He says, pulling a small smile out of the both of them, "Am I taking you back then?"  
Louis nods, glancing at Harry and walking over to Niall.  
"What are you doing?" Niall then asks Harry.  
"Probably going to jog to Cara's,"  
Louis' shoulders slump at that. It's expected really. When alphas get too frustrated they tend to need to knot, preferably in their omegas. Louis didn't think he made Harry that frustrated.  
"Alright, will see you later pal,"  
Harry waves at Niall and Louis keeps looking at him when Niall turns to walk back. Harry gives Louis a tiny smile, just the corners of his mouth turning up. It's not much but it's what Louis needs to know he's not fucked everything up. He turns to follow Niall home, though. In retrospect he probably should have shown Harry he noticed the smile, or shown him that it wasn't Harry that did anything wrong.  
Louis asks him about the camp-out on the way back, and Niall explains with patience, answering every question that Louis asks, no matter how dumb he may think it is. He lets Louis avoid talking about what happened in the park, which is one of the reasons Louis thinks that he likes Niall the most as a friend here. He doesn't ask intrusive questions and Louis feels accepted around him.  
They arrive back at the house and Niall and Louis finds Anne in the kitchen where she has started breakfast. Louis asks Anne if it's okay he misses breakfast, explaining that he had a nightmare and he and Harry went on a walk, he leaves out the reason he came home with Niall and not Harry. Anne says it's okay and asks Louis if he wants to talk about it, which he politely declines. Niall starts explaining that Harry went to Cara's and that's why he went to fetch Louis. Louis slinks out of the room then, not wanting to hear anymore about Harry and Cara. Niall probably knows that Harry has gone there to knot her.  
Louis picks up his phone when he's back in bed, wondering whether to text Harry and say he's sorry or not. It takes a few minutes but he decides not to, not wanting to bother him if he's going at it with Cara. The thought makes him feel physically sick, so he lies down and hugs Harrys jumper to his chest because it still smells like him and he craves the alpha so badly.

\---

"Will there be a day I don't fuck up immensely? Trick question, the answer is unknown," Harry groans as he flops on Cara's bed. Her parents are just leaving for work and Cara is barely awake when he walks in.  
"Harry what the fuck it's like 7am, fuck off," She hits him with a pillow and pulls the duvet over her face.  
"No, Caraaaaa," Harry says with a pout.  
"Let me sleep for ten more minutes, please,"  
Harry doesn't get a choice in the matter, usually she'd probably be awake but she must have had a late night. He ends up tidying bits of her room up for her as she wakes up a bit, moving her perfume bottles into height order and putting all her dirty washing in the basket.  
When it's clear she won't get up without some encouragement he goes downstairs and makes both of them some toast and tea, bringing it back up to Cara who smells it and whips the duvet from her face.  
"Gimme," She says, opening her mouth. Harry does the only logical thing and shoves the rest of his slice of toast into her mouth.  
"You ruin everything," She manages to get out once she's done coughing.  
"I know," Harry takes a huge bite of his next piece.  
"What happened this time?"  
"I don't know, I just said 'oh' and he freaked the fuck out, why would he be so scared of me saying 'oh'?"  
"What?"  
"I know, then he kept asking me not to hurt him, like, I'm not going to fucking hurt him Cara, why won't he see that? I couldn't if I tried,"  
"You know he's just conditioned to be scared of you, right? If he really is your... You know... He wont be able to resist you for long,"  
"I know. But I won't hurt him Cara, I wish he'd realise that,"  
"Fear like that doesn't go after a few days Harry, you of all people should know that. C'mon. It takes time. Show him that he can trust you,"  
Harry just pouts.  
"Aw, sad froggy,"  
"You're no help,"  
"Shut up,"  
They eat for a while, finishing the toast and Harry lies down next to Cara, staring at the ceiling.  
"He had a nightmare this morning. I went to shower and could smell his fear, so I went in, and he was crying and saying no, and like, the usual nightmare restlessness, yeah? And he was in my jumper that I let him borrow. I don't know if I should have gone in to him,"  
"Everything seemed to be okay in your snapchats yesterday,"  
"Yeah, I know, I don't know if he was faking it though,"  
Cara laughs at that.  
"Harry, you know genuine happiness when you see it, dickhead,"  
He doesn't reply.  
"Just give him time, H, he'll come around, by the way, you might have to move the week of the camp out, cause I was watching the weather and from the end of this week we're expecting torrential rain, and I'm not sleeping out when it's pissing it down,"  
"Okay, I'll try and do it for like, Thursday or something. Are you and Lydia free?"  
"Yeah, now leave, I'm trying to sleep."  
Harry kisses her on the cheek and leaves quietly, filling up his waterbottle and washing the plates in the sink before leaving, deciding just to jog back home and tell everybody about the change of the camp date and making sure that everybody is free before solidifying any plans.

He sits next to Niall at the table, drinking orange juice, he noticed as soon as he walked into the room that Louis wasn't in there. He nudges Nialls knee, and whispers ' _where's Louis?_ '.  
"In bed, I think dude, told Anne about a nightmare? Then went to bed,"  
Harry glances up to make sure his mum isn't looking, Gemma is, but that's beside the point. Gemma's sneaky and always looking or listening. She's not being rude, she just likes to make sure she knows what is going on so she knows how to deal with things if something goes wrong.  
"Oh... What did you... You know, what did you tell my mum?" His mother would go mental if she knew how scared Louis had gotten, and probably stop Harry from speaking to him.  
"Just said you wanted to go Cara's, and Louis wanted to come home,"  
"Cheers,"  
He lets everyone almost finish their breakfast and then says about the camp out.  
"How many of you want to come to the camp out then?"  
Everyone he expects to puts their hands up.  
"Awesome, well it should be in a few weeks but Cara said there's torrential rain after the end of this week and onwards, and nobody really wants to camp out on a wet floor, do they? So I was wondering, is everyone okay to do it this week? Probably Thursday?"  
He looks around as everybody nods.  
"Anyone not okay with that?"  
Nobody says that they aren't okay, so Harry stands up and goes to his room to start planning it.  
He can smell Louis and it's peaceful, so he probably is asleep.  
It's Monday, so he has a few days to convince Louis to go on the camp out with them. Harry thinks it would be good for him. He starts planning everything, ordering a bulk pack of marshmallows and sticks to go with them, as well as snacks and bottled drinks. He's excited because if Louis does come, it means he can stay in the same tent section as him, if Louis wanted to, that is. The tent is huge, a communal area, and four 'bedrooms' on each side, each holding two people each. Harry's usually alone in a bedroom, because everyone else has someone to room with, and Harry is sometimes funny about his personal space. He thinks, though, Louis could take every bit of space Harry had and he wouldn't mind. And as much of a creep he sounds, he thinks that he would quite like having Louis close to him all night. If he has a bad dream Harry can calm him down faster and can hug him back to sleep.  
Which is a stupid thought because he doesn't even know if he and Louis are on speaking terms after this morning. It'd probably be best that he doesn't talk to Louis for a while, but he can't help it, his alpha is constantly telling him  
to protect and being the cause of Louis' upset breaks him more inside every time something happens.  
He's ordered all of the snacks for two day delivery when his phone pings with a message. He unlocks his phone, smiling at his background of him and Louis.

**Lou (:**  
_Can we talk ? x_

Harrys chest fills with fear, which is something it almost never does. This is where Louis tells him to fuck off and that he doesn't want him to go near him again. Harry would respect that decision but would probably be checking up on him through other people all the time. Then again, the 'x' at the end of the message would be false hope then, if he was planning on telling him that.

He texts back quickly, a simple ' _Sure, where? xx_ '.  
His reply comes not moments later as Harry is fixing his hair and spraying himself down with cologne to mask the alpha smell (again).

**Lou (:**  
_I'm at the pond thing ?_

He practically runs downstairs, better not to drag it out. He nips into the kitchen and grabs another bottle of water for the both of them, his alpha making him subconsciously care for the younger of them. He walks out to the garden and sees Louis staring at the fish in the pond with his back to him. It's such a lovely sight, Louis' hair is slightly messy, probably from where he's been lying down on it. He looks so small and fluffy and Harry thinks he looks like a baby hedgehog. He wants to hold him as he watches the fish. It's mid-day so the sun's at its highest point, like a spotlight only for Louis.  
He's a little worried to approach in case he scares him, but he's expecting him, so he walks towards him slowly.  
Louis looks up at him as soon as he hears him, his doesn't look as scared as he did at the park, he even smiles a little at him.  
"I got you a water," Harry tells him as he hands him one of the bottles.  
Louis takes it with a grateful smile and Harry sits down on the seat next to his.  
"Were you busy?" Louis asks.  
"No. Never am, really," Harry says. Louis looks a little confused but Harry doesn't explain that he could be the busiest person in the world and if Louis needed him he'd still say he wasn't busy.  
"Okay, I want to, like, apologise for earlier-"  
"Nonsense, you have no need to ap-"  
"Please let me finish," Harry can see some fear in Louis' face because he interrupted the alpha, but it quickly disappears as Harry speaks again,  
"Okay, shoot,"  
"I- I want to apologise for earlier, I'm like, not used to anybody being nice to me, especially alphas. I'm not used to being allowed to have an opinion, and I thought you were going to-to hurt me because I didn't give you a definitive answer. I'm not used to being treated like an actual human being, and it's weird because I know, I know you won't hurt me, and I know you probably wouldn't even if caring for people wasn't your job, but I can't help but be on edge. I'm like, I'm really used to people doing bad things to me if I say or do the wrong thing, and you're the first alpha that's even just _hugged_ me, Harry. I don't know how to handle it. And when you call me nicknames, you're the only person really that's ever called me something nice in a nickname, and I like it, probably more than I should, but I can't help it and I'm sorry for that, and you don't have to talk to me after this, but I just, I needed to tell you because I really do want to be friends with you but you need to be patient with me because while I'm scared of you, I also crave you and I crave an alpha being nice to me much more than I did before. It's like you being nice to me has broken a dam inside of me that leaves me needing more. If you don't want to be friends with me after hearing this, then that's okay, I know I'm a lot of work, and I know I'm probably not worth the effort to you, and that's okay, I guess I'm used to it, if that's what you decide,"  
Harry watches Louis intently while he pours his heart out, as every word leaves his lips like he's planned it, he probably has.  
"Louis, you have no reason to say sorry to me, not now, not ever. You're allowed to be scared, you're allowed to have opinions and refuse things, you're allowed to be human, I wont ever treat you like anything less than amazing. I'd never hurt you, not in a million years, more, even. I can be patient. I don't mind that, Louis it's only your fourth day here, you're doing bloody great. When Zayn got here he didn't speak to anybody for _weeks_. I just need to know that you're okay with everything I've done so far. Like the hugs and the nicknames. If anything makes you uncomfortable then please tell me, you're not obligated to blindly accept things because I'm an alpha, you know that now, right?"  
"I, yeah. I'm fine with it all. Good, even. It's helping me. It's just... Is Cara okay with it...? Like... The nicknames? I know they don't mean anything, but like, yeah,"  
"What?" Why the fuck would Cara not be okay with it? Harry must look really confused because Louis looks a little bit scared, "It's okay, I just don't know what you mean? Why would Cara not be okay with it?"  
"I just- thought that-like- she'syouromega so she mightnotbeokaywithit, and I know I'm not even therightgender but- yeah," Harry can feel a little grin spread over his face as he watches Louis stumble over his words.  
"Louis, you think that me and Cara are _mated_?" Harry says incredulously.  
"Yeah, she has-she has the mark and you-you go hers a lot, I'm sorry if that's intruding,"  
"Louis, me and Cara aren't together,"  
"What?"  
Harry laughs because Louis looks like a lost puppy.  
"Me and Cara, we aren't mated. She's in a very happy relationship with her girlfriend, how has nobody told you this?"  
"You're not together?" Louis' voice is quieter now.  
"Nope. We've been best friends since, like, forever though,"  
"Oh, right,"  
Harry can't believe that Louis couldn't tell how gone for him he is. He can't believe that he genuinely thought him and Cara were together. She's not even a male. Harry barks out a laugh at the situation.  
"Cara is fine with it, as far as I know, little one,"  
He watches as Louis' cheeks heat up and his lips tug into a small smile. He pulls his chair closer to Louis' and puts his hand on his arm, dwarfing it.  
"I can be as patient as you need me to, I just need you to be honest about what's okay and what's not okay,"  
"Everything you've done so far is okay. I'm sorry for freaking out so much,"  
"No need, lovely,"  
Louis doesn't say anything after that, just looks down to where Harry is stroking his arm gently.  
That's how they stay for a while, not speaking, Harry leaving gentle touches up Louis' arm and Louis watching the fish, that is until Harry realises he needs to go inside to make lunch. Louis offers to help him but Anne walks into the room, saying she needs to speak to Louis, so Harry is left making the lunch on his own.  
He can't believe that Louis thought he and Cara were mated. He can't believe Louis thought Harry was _mated_ at all, especially to a _girl_. As if it isn't blatently obvious he's gay, and falling for Louis more every single day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so here's some explaining.  
> This whole chapter is Day Four of Louis being there. A Monday.  
> He arrived on a Friday. He's not shy, per se, but he's just learnt to not be social, but he knows how to be.
> 
> Louis and Harry cannot help falling so fast for each other, I know it's not realistic but come-on, it's an A/B/O fic. I'm trying to keep it as realistic as possible (for example I'm not gonna go down the average route of Louis gets kidnapped and Harry goes ballistic) but all will be explained later!


	6. keep me in mind

"So Louis, now that you've settled in for a few days, I'd like to talk to you about some things, if you feel you're ready to?"  
"I, yes, o-of course, ma'am,"  
Louis' sat in Anne's room, on a small black sofa. He wonders whether everyone else who's had to sit here felt as nervous as he does. Anne's room is different to every other room he's seen, the main area is like an office, with rows of folders lining a huge bookshelf. There's a door which leads to, what Louis is assuming, an en suite, and next to that is what seems to be her bed area.  
Anne is sat at her desk, the sofa that Louis is on is facing it, and Anne has swiveled her chair round so that her main focus is on Louis, but her arm is still resting on a table, pen in hand, ready to take notes.

"Anne, is okay, thank you, though. Before we properly start, how have your first couple of days been? I know that it can be very overwhelming sometimes,"  
"It's been... Good? Yeah, like-just good," Louis doesn't know how to say it feels like a home, more than when he was with his family.  
"Good, okay so first off, your education? Did you go to school before you came here?"  
"I did, but, my step-dad, he made me stop like, stop going," He's a bit worried about telling her these things, but repeats to himself that Anne and Gemma and Harry are here to help him, _not_ to make his life a misery.  
"Okay and when was this?"  
...  
They discuss his education, and Anne comes up with a study timetable for him to complete his GCSE's. He managed to do most of the work at his school before his step-dad made him drop out. The school got concerned for his health, and after a while his step-dad got so paranoid they ended up moving to a different city and he rarely let Louis leave the house after that. Louis still misses his school friends, it's been over a year since he had to leave, but he misses Stan, his old best friend.  
They discuss his health and how he feels, they don't go too in-depth about his mental health, Anne says she is going to schedule an actual appointment with her next week, explaining that she is a qualified psychiatrist. She says he needs more time to settle in and feel at home before she can even think about him opening up to her.  
After that the just chat for a while, to get used to one another, so that Louis doesn't feel like he is talking to a stranger when his appointment comes next week. She explains that if he thinks he needs one sooner, then he can say and she will schedule it quicker.  
Louis finally fills in a form, with all his details, as well as a form for consent that anything he says may be passed on to higher authorities in order to find his step-father.  
He agrees, because of course he does.

Louis spends the rest of the day up in his room, by the time him and Anne had finished their chat, it was past lunchtime, so she just made some toast for him and told him he can eat it upstairs. He writes about what he and Anne has spoken about in his notebook, then settled at his desk, studying. Anne had given him some schoolbooks to learn from, and Louis loves learning. He hated his stepdad for making him drop out of school, because who does that? He's a fast learner and wants good grades now that he can finally do an exam and get qualifications. He knew that his phone would probably distract him, so he turned it off and left it on the bed, so he can get on with studying.

\---

Harry wonders whether he should have told Louis that him and Cara weren't mated, because thus far, it seems like he's ignoring him. After he'd finished the normal chat his mum has with everyone a few days after they move in, he went straight up to his room. Harry has tried texting him, but it isn't even delivering, which means that Louis has either blocked him or turned his phone off.  
He realises that Louis is probably ten times more scared of him than he was before, because generally, in a society in which alphas aren't blamed for everything, they pretty much get away with anything. That goes the same for unmated alphas, and they have more of a track record of violence towards omegas and inability to control their actions. Harry calls bullshit on that, he's unmated and _never_ lost control to a dangerous extent. He thinks any alpha that uses their status as an excuse for hurting others, _especially_ an omega, shouldn't be called an alpha. Alphas like them are the reason that omegas are scared to be themselves, and why it's become a norm for alphas to be violent.

He tries calling him a few times, he knows he probably looks extremely desperate but he doesn't care. He doesn't want to go to Louis' room and ask because he's scared that he will scare him, at least a phone is a buffer between the two of them. He can smell him, anyways, and he doesn't seem to be distressed. It's neutral, he thinks.

Harry wants to write for a while. He loves writing, pouring his heart out page after page. He loves putting the words together, making them sound like something special, making them sound like they belong together. However, writing in the state of mind he's in will leave nothing but toxic words on a page because he's terrified that Louis is scared of him and that will be the end of that. He knows eventually, if Cara's theory is right, Louis would end up talking to him, unable to resist, but Harry doesn't think that he can wait too long for Louis to do that. He would, if he had to, of course he would. He'd probably do anything for the tiny omega.

So, he decides to go for a walk, or a jog, whatever. Needs to get rid of some energy.  
It's not until he's around two miles away from Skylar that he decides to have a proper rest. He sits down in a field and stares up at the sky, drenching himself in water because, fucking hell, it's hot, even for early October in the UK.

The sky is beautiful, he thinks, bright, bright blue with wisps of white floating through it. It's not the best blue, he thinks the best blue is probably the colour of Louis' eyes. Louis' eyes are like the ocean, he thinks, they're so _so_ blue and they've got subtle hints of green. They're never the same _shade_ of blue though, it's captivating. Sometimes, he thinks, they're dark like the sky before a storm. Sometimes they're bright like the Caribbean sea. Sometimes, he can't even _describe_ the colour they are, can't compare it to anything because it's so damn enchanting.

He wishes that Louis looked at him more often. If he wasn't scared of doing something wrong all the time. He thinks this, but he doesn't think he'd want Louis any other way. He just wants Louis to be comfortable with him, and wants him to be happy not just _with_ him, but genuine happiness all the time. Harry won't stop until that is nothing but real life, 100% truth.

His phone pings as he's getting back up. He hopes it's Louis, only to be disappointed when his sisters name pops up.

**Gems**  
_You coming home for dinner H? x_

After typing out ' _No. Gonna jog a little longer. x_ ' he pockets his phone and starts up jogging again.

\---

Dinner _sucks_. Well, not the dinner, but dinner time does. Louis is trying to eat, but Harry isn't here, and because Louis wasn't there at lunch, suddenly everyone thinks it's okay to bombard him with questions. Well, Nick, Max, Eleanor and Aiden do. He can't tell them to shut up, because he's a male omega and he loathes that fact right now. They won't listen when Niall or Zayn try and tell them to shut up, Liam's at Sophia's. Leigh, the only female alpha is ill and in bed with a stomach bug. Gemma and Anne have both gone to Anne's room to eat, so they can speak about money or something, he thinks he heard someone say, so nobody is able to tell them to shut up.  
He's _trying_ to avoid the questions as they get more and more invasive. It's Aiden who says something that Louis doesn't like, but knows is probably true.  
"Are you going to get with Leigh? Or Harry? He'd never fuck you,"  
He probably didn't mean to say it, it was probably just a passing thought, but to Louis, it's reinforcing every thought.  
He stands straight up, not meeting anybody's eyes and walks straight up to his bedroom, locking the door and crawling under his duvet. It's not long before he's sobbing, he knows Harry wouldn't want him, in any way. Who would? He keeps getting his hopes up. Why would someone like Harry go for someone like Louis? Other than biological reasons. He's pathetic. He doesn't even think Harry would even purely based on biological reasons. He's a wreck, on an apocalyptic proportion. He's always been this, always known he is, ever since he could consciously form bad thoughts. Which was probably _too_ early. Childhood is supposed to be a happy time, full of wonder and warmth, love and affection. All Louis can recall is the opposite.

His eyes burn, throat constricting, his face is probably red and blotchy, but he can't stop crying. Why does the comment affect him so much? It's not like he ever had a chance, should've expected people to say this. And the worst part is, throughout all his crying and all his malignant thoughts, all he wants is _Harry_.

He should have known, and expected to get attached to the first kind alpha, but to this level is incomprehensible. It's foolish. Desperate and cringe-y.  
He's a broken omega.

\--

Louis hears knocking on his door for a few minutes, Niall's voice reaching him even underneath his duvet, then Zayn's voice. He feels bad for ignoring them but they probably don't even _want_ to check if he's okay. Probably just have to. So he ignores the persistent knocking, the comforting voices that are trying to lure him out of his coma of desolation. They stop after a while, anyway. Probably gave up with him, as everyone else has or will do.

He falls asleep a little later. Crying makes him tired and it's warm under the blanket.

Next thing he knows he's waking up to a gentle, but persistent knocking on his door. It scares him at first, he thinks he's back where he was and his stepdad is going to come in and start hurting him. Which is dumb because his stepdad never even knocked.  
"Louis?"  
It's Harry's voice coming through the door. He wants Harry. It makes him start crying again because he's getting his hopes up and Harry is probably only here because of his job, but he wants to see Harry. He's still a mess, pretty sure his face is a mess and he has crazy bed and tears styled hair, but if Harry already doesn't want him, this won't matter. No point in trying, if he's got no chance anyway.  
"Louis, I know you're awake now, are you gonna let me in, kitten?"  
"No," He says without thinking, panicking after because who is he to refuse an alpha? Why did he even say no? He wants to see Harry.  
"That's okay, I'm going to go into the bathroom and talk to you from that door, if that's okay. That way nobody can eavesdrop,"  
"You don't have to, Harry. I'm fine,"  
There's a slight silence after that, where Louis thinks Harry has just gone downstairs or something. He sits up in his bed and runs a hand through his hair.  
"Louis?" The voice comes from the in front of him this time, from the bathroom door, not from the left like the normal door is.  
"Hi," Louis croaks out, his throat hating him from the amount of crying he did.  
There's still pretty much a whole room in between them, the room is pretty big and the en suite door is all the way over the other side as to where Louis is.  
"Hey there, sweetie, are you okay?"  
"I'm fine," Louis lies.  
"Could you come a little closer? I can't hear you well, and if you speak any louder, any passerby will probably be able to hear you, sorry,"  
Louis is skeptical, is it a trick? Why is Harry even trying to talk to him? He moves closer anyway, sitting cross-legged on the carpet in front of the door.  
"You there?" Harry's voice is soft. He realises he's probably had training in this.  
"Yeah," Louis says. Harry must hear how close Louis is because of how impossibly softer his voice gets.  
"You want to tell me what happened?"  
"I don't know,"  
"Are you sure I can't come in?"  
Louis doesn't answer. Doesn't know if he's allowed to change his mind. He can smell the alpha from where he's sat, it's so comforting. Alpha and comfort don't usually go together in his world, but it is now and he just wants the smell closer to him. Wants the smell to immerse him in nothing but comfort.  
"Unlock the door if you want to,"  
Louis does. He stands up slowly while Harry stays silent. Unlocking the door near silently because he doesn't want to look too eager, then stands back out of the projection of the door.  
"I'm gonna come in now,"

The door opens excruciatingly slow. Louis doesn't know when Harry actually chooses to enter because he's too ashamed to look at him.

_brokenomegabrokenomegabrokenomegabrokenomegabrokenomega_

"Oh, little one, come here," Louis doesn't know the emotion Harry's voice carries but he thinks it sounds close to sadness.  
Louis does though, blindly walking until Harry's hands are on his shoulders. He only flinches a little bit. Harry pulls him into a hug, a much needed hug. Louis doesn't hug back, just lets himself be hugged for a while, resting his body against Harry's.  
He can hear Harry's heart beating in his chest, a continuous rhythm of _thumps_ 's and it shouldn't be as comforting as it is. All he can smell is the alpha too. It's like that breath of fresh air after staying underwater for a few seconds too long, or the first glimpse of sunlight on a night you just want to be over. He doesn't know why it's like that, but it is.

Harry kisses his head, the messy mound of hair resting there and Louis preens because even though it is a mess, Harry still kisses it. He wonders if the same would apply to him.  
He's a mess, would Harry still kiss him?  
The thought makes him cry, because who is he kidding? Harry probably wouldn't kiss him even on his good days. Harry deserves better than someone like Louis.  
Harry holds him, though, until Louis breaths a big breath in through his mouth. This happens far too often, Louis feels pathetic.  
"Do you wanna sit on the bed?"  
"Y-yeah. If that's okay?"  
Harry nods and leads Louis to the bed with a big hand on his waist.  
"Do you want to talk about it? Maybe tell me what happened?" He says, once they're sat on the bed, next to each other. Harry's hand hasn't left Louis' waist, his thumb is stroking soft reassurance there. It's pleasant.  
Louis shakes his head no. He doesn't, someone probably told him anyway. He doesn't want to admit how pathetic he is to the one person he doesn't want to look pathetic in front of.  
"That's okay, love. You can if you want, even if it's in a few days, even if it bothers you in the future, you can. Can I ask why you haven't been answering your phone today? I thought you'd just blocked me but Niall said he couldn't get through either,"  
"I-um, I turned my phone off to study. Sorry,"  
"No, it's fine, was just worried about you is all, kitten,"  
"I wouldn't- you, I wouldn't block you, and you shouldn't worry, about me I mean,"  
"I do, though, and that's okay. My mum and sister don't know about what happened, I don't either, Niall and Zayn won't tell me,"  
"I know, like, it's your job, to like, worry about people here, but, you shouldn't, with me, I mean,"  
"My job isn't to worry about people, Louis,"  
"Sorry, I mean, like-"  
"I meant, like, I worry about you because I want to, not because it's my job to, it's not my job to, you get what I mean?"  
"Not really,"  
"I worry about you because I can and because I want to. Even if it was my job to _not_ to care, I probably still would,"  
"Oh,"  
Louis doesn't get what he's saying, really. His omega understands it on a primal level, alpha doing their job and caring for an omega. It makes his body heat up a tiny amount, which, okay, it's never done that before. It goes after a few seconds though, so he doesn't think anything of it.  
"What's the time?" Louis asks. He doesn't know what time he fell sleep, let alone what time Harry woke him up, plus he's still tired, he hopes it's not like, three am.  
"Ten past eleven,"  
"Oh, do you want to go bed? It's late,"  
"I'll go when you want me to,"  
"I don't wa-," Louis stops what he's saying, realising how suggestive it will sound, ' _I don't want you to go but I want to go bed'_ isn't exactly the best thing to say to someone you've known less than a week, but once he's had the thought of Harry sleeping in the same bed as him, he doesn't know how to get rid of it. It's not even a _sexual_ thought.  
He's snapped back to reality by Harry's voice,  
"Louis? Lou?"  
"I'm tired,"  
Harry chuckles.  
"So you want me to leave?"  
Louis doesn't answer because, well, he doesn't want Harry to leave, no. But Harry is standing up anyway, pulling Louis to stand as well and then into a hug.  
Louis feels like stars are exploding in his body. He loves when Harry hugs him.  
"Night, kitten, turn on your phone,"  
Harry hugs him quickly again and then leaves the room. Louis turns his phone on, and is immediately attacked by notifications.

He has 11 missed calls, and 23 messages. Considering he only has about 4 or 5 contacts, he's surprised.  
He reads Niall's, asking him to open the door and asking if he's okay. He reads Zayn's, telling him he's there if he wants to talk. Then he reads Harry's, first they're just asking how the meeting went, then a few joke-y ones, and then a few asking him if he's okay. He knows that's when Niall told him he'd locked himself in his room.

_Heeey, sorry for worrying you, niiight_

He hits send before he even has a chance to question it, goes to the bathroom, then comes back to his phone and climbs into bed.

**Harry :)**  
_No problem, sleep well, lovely. xx_

Louis smiles at his phone screen dumbly then lies down in bed. He needs to stop getting so emotional.


	7. i almost thought i heard you say stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> VISUALS AT THE END OF THE CHAPTER !!

Now, Wednesdays are usually good to Harry. He usually has a nice chilled out day, finishing with movie night. It's far enough into the week that people aren't complaining about the week starting, it's far enough from the end of the week for people not to be fussed about the next week coming. But today, so far, has been tragic. Not in a dramatic sense, but nothing has gone to plan and Harry just wants to get back into bed, or sleep on his balcony for a few hours.

First thing Wednesday mornings, he usually takes a walk to the Farmers to buy some eggs for the week. It's only half an hour there and back, and the Farmers kids love him. Jessie, who's seven, and Frankie, who's five. He usually plays with them for a while, humouring them while they tell him how to feed the cow (every single week) and showing him their recent drawings.

The thing is, he wanted Louis to come with him this week. He wants to see how good Louis is with kids and have a nice walk with him and familiarise himself and his omega with Harry and his alpha. But at the same time, Harry's alpha screams at him to protect and care for Louis, and all the crying the previous night made Harry not want to wake the sleeping boy. Louis needs his sleep and space.

So he made the journey alone and played with the kids without Louis there and walked back with the eggs alone.

After that was breakfast and it was so fucking _awkward_ and Harry knew it was probably something that happened yesterday but Niall and Zayn refuse to tell him. The whole table was tense, aside from Gemma and Anne who didn't even seem to notice the atmosphere. Louis barely ate, even with encouragement. Heck, Louis didn't even utter a _word_ at the table and Harry wanted nothing more than to use his alpha voice and get someone to tell him. (He didn't though. He has control and he knows better).  
He couldn't even bring Louis some breakfast up to his room a little later, to make sure he ate because Eleanor and Max insisted they take him shopping. They go _way_ too much in his opinion, each to their own, but they already have three wardrobes full of clothes. _Each._

So he took them, alone, because, if he's honest, he doesn't really want Louis around anybody but himself, Zayn and Niall, and _maybe_ Liam. He trusts Liam, but he's an alpha, and because of that, he's competition for Louis. Even if he is mated. Any alpha can unmate their omega if they find a better omega. It's only painful for an omega to get unmated, the scar on their neck gives them something like an allergic reaction, as if it shouldn't be on the body. This can last anywhere from a month to years, depending on how attached the omega is to the alpha.  
Harry doesn't understand how anybody could unmate an omega. If Louis chooses Harry back as a mate, he doesn't think he could ever unmate him. Mating for Harry is a lifelong thing. How it should be. He doesn't think he'd ever find a better omega. And, technically speaking, Louis isn't omega yet. He's not had his first heat, doesn't produce slick (maybe slight amounts here there when he's _really_ aroused, but not enough to not need lube). He can't take an alphas knot yet, and in society's eyes, that doesn't make him a full omega yet.  
And so Harry wouldn't mind if Louis _chose_ to hang with other people, but he's not going to ask Louis if he wants to come with him if he's with anybody apart from the boys and Cara.

Harry followed Eleanor and Max in and out all of the shops they wanted to go in. He has to stay with them because he's an alpha and they need protection. It's his job. Liam sometimes offers to go into town with others, or Leigh. They're the only other alphas in the house and sometimes Harry just cannot be bothered to follow people around shops on his own and listening to their shitty conversations.

\--

It's lunchtime and Harry is almost ready to drown himself in chip-fat because he's listened to nothing but Max and Eleanor's conversations all morning and it's so _dry_ because all they've been talking about is high-end fashion brands. The three of them are sat at a pub in the middle of town, waiting for their lunches, so Harry decides to text Louis because it's evident that Eleanor and Max aren't planning to include him in the conversation any time soon.

_Hiiiii Louis, how are you? Feeling any better? :) xx_

His reply comes not long after.

**Lou (:**  
_um, yes. I guess, anyway , thank you ! what about you ? x_

His phone buzzes again seconds later.

**Lou (:**  
_:)_

He smiles at that, looking up to check Max and Eleanor are okay and still not paying him attention, even though he can hear them.

_Eh, Eleanor and Max are boring to me. I'm okay though. Would've texted sooner but have to keep an eye on them. xx_

**Lou (:**  
_oh , are you not now then ?_

 

_Yeah, kitten. Just getting lunch. Have you eaten anything else? :) xx_

**Lou (:**  
_yes ! zayn gave me some of his biscuits from his room :) xx_  
_and he says lunch should be ready soon_

 

_Good, eat up, little one. Have to go, the food is here. xx_

Harry puts his phone down and takes to food from the waitress kindly, smiling at her. She's unmated and he can smell she's an omega. She flushes after he smiles and Harry isn't phased. Doesn't have eyes for anybody but Louis. Has never had eyes for just any omega that shows him the slightest interest.  
They're tucking into their food when Max speaks.  
"So, are you gonna ask for her number?"  
At first Harry doesn't realise he's being spoken to until Eleanor coughs.  
"What?"  
"Are you going to ask for her number? The waitress?" Max gives him a nudge and a wink.  
"What? No, I'm not,"  
"Why not?! She was interested in you!"  
"No, Eleanor. I don't care and I'm not interested,"  
They're both staring at him incredulously. Harry thinks he preferred when they weren't involving him in the conversation. He carries on eating his lunch anyway, ignoring their stares.  
"Are you seriously not interested? She was stunning, AND an omega!"  
And to be honest, Harry doesn't blame them for assuming he was straight because he's never really 'come out', as he doesn't think it's a necessity. His mum and Gemma and his closer friends know but to be fair he's never been interested in anybody in particular or had a relationship with anybody so Max and Eleanor wouldn't exactly _know_.  
"I'm gay," He breathes out, simply. He doesn't care what they think and telling them is better than listening to them try and convince him that this blonde chick was a perfect omega for him. (Which is ridiculous. She isn't and never will be Louis.)  
"What?!!" Both of them say at the same time. He just nods.  
"Shit-"  
"-that means-"  
"-yeah, oh my god-"  
"I don't speak Eleanor and Max language, what are you on about?"  
"Do I tell him?" Eleanor asks Max.  
"Yes, you do," Harry replies for Max.  
"Okay, well," She takes a long swig of her water, "Yesterday, at dinner, we were like, speaking to Louis, yeah? And Aiden was asking who he'd get with, and obviously it's more common for male omegas to be gay, so when he asked if Louis was gonna get with you, he kinda like, said that you wouldn't fuck him anyway... Like because we thought you were, you know. Straight,"  
Harry fishmouths at them for a few seconds then Max continues on from Eleanor.  
"Yeah, and like, then Louis just walked out, we didn't know why. Maybe he has a crush on you,"  
Harry nods, finally shutting his mouth and looking down at his food.  
"Thank you for telling me. Eat up, we should be getting home soon,"

This is a colossal predicament. Louis probably doesn't know that Harry is gay, which in turn, means that Louis won't believe that Harry is interested in him, probably thinking that Harry is just nice because it's his job to be (which it technically is, but he's nice because he wants to be with Louis). But another problem is, he can't just randomly tell Louis that he's gay, that'd be weird, like you wouldn't just tell someone randomly that you're straight. Also, if that was the reason that Louis was upset the previous night, then Harry may need to rethink his plan of action to get Louis and his omega used to himself and his alpha.  
But also, it could be something related to it, Harry thinks. Maybe Louis' past was much worse than he thought, and he'd been sexually abused by an alpha and someone bringing up getting fucked triggered him. Which means he also can't bring up what was said for the possibility of triggering.

\---

"I'm asexual, yeah,"  
Louis and Zayn are in Zayn's bedroom again, like they were before lunch, how they got onto the subject of sexuality is beyond him but he doesn't mind.  
"I, I don't mean to be ignorant but I'm not entirely sure I know what that is," Louis looks down at the floor, thinking he probably should know what it is.  
"That's alright mate, at least you don't think I'm sexually attracted to plants like most people," Zayn laughs at Louis' horrified face and continues, "I'm not by the way, been asexual basically just means you don't experience sexual attraction, you know? But there's so much more to it, like Ace's can enjoy sex and stuff? And like, can experience attraction like, 'wow she or he is pretty' but it's never a 'wow I want them to bang me' kinda thing, but yeah, basically all you need to know is that I'm not into fucking plants or people or anything,"  
Louis nods, not really knowing what to say, the fact that Zayn is so casual about this is rad, and Louis makes a mental note to look it up later so he isn't uneducated on the subject and if Zayn ever brings it up again in the future he can hold a conversation with him.  
"That's pretty cool, when did you find out you were asexual?"  
"I don't know really. I guess all my friends went through puberty and were talking about sex and stuff and I just never saw the big deal about it. For I while I just thought I was broken, like, I dunno. But I remember googling why I wasn't like everyone one day and from then on I just knew what it was and that I wasn't broken, I just, I'm not ashamed of it, it's just how I am, and that's cool with me,"  
Louis finds it cool that he got past thinking he was broken. Granted, he doesn't mean broken in the same sense but Louis wonders if he could get past thinking(knowing) he is broken.  
"I'm, er, I'm gay?" It feels weird actually telling someone, but Zayn just smiles and ruffles his hair gently.  
"Good for you, lad, you got your eye on anybody?"  
Louis wants to say Harry, but that would be embarrassing because Harry's not gay probably and wouldn't like Louis anyway. Whatever, he thinks. Zayn probably wouldn't tell Harry anyway.  
"I, erm, I like Harry. Kind of. But like, he wouldn't like me anyway," He's picking at the skin around his fingernails, avoiding Zayns eyes and hiding his blush.  
"What makes you think that, Louis?"  
"Because like, I'm me, and he- he's him, and like, what Aiden said yesterday, and he probably isn't like, gay, yeah,"  
"Louis, this isn't my place to say but Harry is gay, I can't believe you didn't... know? And why what Aiden said?"  
"Because, he said he wouldn't, you know, fuck me. And it's true, because like, Harry is Harry and why would he want someone like... like me?"  
"Oh my, Aiden said that yesterday because Harry isn't exactly 'out' to them. They all think he is straight, he's never felt the need to explicitly say that he's gay to them because they didnt need to know. He's not ashamed of being gay, just doesn't see the need to come out,"  
"Oh,"  
So Harry _is_ in fact gay. Which is good. But Louis is still broken so there's no point getting his hopes up and getting ahead if himself that Harry would choose him of all omegas.  
"Yeah. Maybe you shouldn't tell him I told you though, just have him tell you if and when he's ready,"  
"I won't tell him, don't worry,"  
Zayn and Louis just chill after that, Zayn puts some music on Louis' phone for him and shows him some of his favourite artists like Blackbear and EDEN, which Louis likes. He also shows off his sketchbook, Louis especially likes some of the Marvel ones.  
"You know it's movie night tonight, right?" Zayn says while Louis and him are both working on their own sketches.  
"N-no? What's that?"  
"We just watch movies all night, we do every week, just, all of us just sit and eat junk, you know?"  
"Oh, right, then what's tomorrow?"  
"Camp out, we have a huge tent and everyone sleeps outside, it's nice because it gives us a chance to chat as a group or just chill somewhere away from the home for a while, if that makes sense. It's just nice to be away from the same four walls, even just for a night,"  
"Do you not like it here?"  
Louis is confused because this is the nicest place he has ever been in and if he had to go back to where he used to live he would seriously consider running away or suicide because now he has even the slightest of inklings of how life should be, rather than how he imagined it to be, full of hate and abuse for the rest of his life, he would never go back, even if he does think he deserved any hate and abuse he received.  
"I love it, we all do, really, but it's a bit same-same-y, you know? It's nice to get out into the open and feel safe. We feel safe with the alpha's yeah, but it's just not the same as being able to sleep outside, it's just freeing, is all,"  
"I get you, cool, is it okay if I go and have a bath while Harry is still out? I need one,"  
"Oh, shit yeah! I forgot you and Harry have to share with H, sure,"  
"Yeah, it's where-where we first... Met, kind of,"  
"Oh?"  
"Maybe a story for like, another time?"  
"Sure pal, see you later,"  
Louis leave the Zayn and walks straight to his room and into the en suite he shares with Harry. He doesn't know how much longer Harry will be out, so he locks both sides of the bathroom and starts up a bath. He goes into the cupboard unit for his stuff and sees the Lush bath things that Harry got for him. He sees one called "The Comforter" and his mind immediately puts Harry to the name. Harry has done nothing but comfort Louis since he got here and Louis sortofmaybewants Harry to have a bath with him with the comforter bubble bar. That would be lovely, Louis thinks. He blushes at his own thoughts though, realising how creepy he would sound if he ever had to say that sentence out loud.  
He follows the bubble bars instruction and places his shampoo, conditioner and showergel on the side of the bath while it runs. He puts his phone on the side with some music playing that Zayn put on and eventually climbs into the bath slowly, he damn near moans at how great it is to have a bath. He rarely got to have a bath at his old house, having to share a bathroom with four younger sisters, his mum and his step dad made it almost impossible, especially since his stepdad would yell at him or hit him if he took too long in the bathroom.  
The bubblebar smells _amazing_ , he's not even exaggerating. It smells so good and Louis wishes he could smell it all the damn time, it's a close second to the way Harry smells.  
He lets himself relax in the bath, laying back into the bubbles and breathing in the warm air. He wonders what it'd be like if Harry was here, letting Louis lean back against his warm chest and wrapping his arms around Louis' middle. He imagines Harry gently washing his hair, massaging his scalp gently and rinsing the suds slowly. He imagines him kissing the back of his neck as he washes him, imagines Harry's _huge_ hands everywhere on his body, his arms, back, stomach, thighs, slowly dragging his hand upwards until they're incredibly close to his ... _fuck_. The thought makes Louis gasp and he immediately opens his eyes. He's never had those thoughts before, why would he now? He starts washing himself immediately, distracting himself from the thoughts.

\---

Harry is so glad to _finally_ be home. It's four in the afternoon and he only had two hours downtime before movie night begins. Max and Eleanor take _so_ long when they go shopping. He greets his mum and gives Gemma a sweater he bought for her because it reminded him of her, then makes his way up to his bedroom. As soon as he reaches the top floor he can smell the bubblebar that he bought for Louis, so Louis must either in the bath still or just gotten out of it. He doesn't keep his mind on it for long because he knows if he thinks about Louis naked and dripping (with water) he will, without a doubt, get hard. Instead he grabs his notebook from his bedside table and walks onto his balcony and before he knows it he's writing away.

\--

 

He goes down to the living room an hour and a half later, laying out big cushions and bean bags so that everybody can sit and watch. Harry decides that him and Louis are going to have the double seater sofa today. Fuck everybody else. Perrie, Leigh, Jade and Jesy will probably have the triple seater this week. Which means everyone else will have to sit on the beanbags and cushions.

He walks into the kitchen and finds Aiden and Nick in there chatting to each other with cups of coffee in their hands.  
"Hey boys," Harry doesn't mean for it to sound condescending, except, he really does. They're younger than him and immature and they were the ones that upset Louis so much so Harry really isn't really feeling being nice to them.  
"Hiya, y'alright?" They both chime at the same time,  
Harry hums, grabbing some bowls out of the cupboard and placing them on a tray, and making his way over to where all of the junk food is kept.  
"Good," Nick says.  
Harry doesn't actually mind Nick much, has had some great conversations with him, but Aiden makes Harry want to punch a wall every time he opens his mouth. They're twins, but clearly Nick got the brains and the common sense.  
"How are you?" He makes sure to look directly at Nick when he says it, directing the question at him.  
"Good thanks, yeah," Nick smiles slightly.  
"Yeah I'm good, thanks," Aiden says bitterly from behind Harry so Harry turns round with an eyebrow raised and stares at him for a second before going back to putting junk on the tray for tonight.  
"Do you know what we're watching tonight?" Nick picks up a bag of crisps that fell out of the cupboard and put it on the tray.  
"Don't have a clue mate, cheers,"  
"Mmkay, we'll see you in a bit, yeah?"  
"Alright, there's only like fifteen minutes though, until the first film goes on, you should probably go and get everyone, if that's okay?"  
"Yeah man, cool, in a bit,"  
Aiden and Nick leave, without another word from Aiden, he can probably tell that Harry is more pissed off with him than usual.  
Harry places the bowls and crisps and chocolate around the living room, on the tables and on the floor next to all of the cushions and beanbags then runs upstairs to the top floor, he passes Aiden and Nick on the girls floor knocking on the doors to get everyone.  
He knocks on Niall's, Liam's and Zayn's doors and then runs into his room and fixes his hair and sprays a little deodorant on himself. It would've been nice to shower but he didn't know how long Louis was in the bath for and he didn't want to scare him by knocking and checking.  
He ends up going into the en suite to pee anyway, it still smells like the bubble bar and it smells so good. After peeing Harry decides to just knock on the door to Louis' this way rather than going all the way around and knocking on the proper entrance. It's sort of more personal this way, Louis will probably know it's Harry immediately.  
"Hello?" Harry smiles at Louis' voice.  
"It's me, you coming down for movie night?"  
"Uhh, yeah, the door is, uh, open by the way,"  
Harry opens the door and sees Louis sat at his desk with his sketchbook out, staring down at it and concentrating on what he's doing. The first thing that he notices though, is the _smell_ , fucking hell, it's just Louis and nothing has ever smelt nicer to him than Louis, but because he's getting more and more used to being at Skylar his scent is settling where his body is most comfortable. Home, basically. It also smells like the bubble bar though, it's like nine parts Louis and one part bubble bar and both smell gorgeous to Harry. Harry grabs the polaroid camera and snaps a quick shot of him because it's so adorable and deserves more than just an iPhone picture of it.  
The flash going off makes Louis look up at Harry through his lashes and Harry is pretty sure he has died and gone to heaven because what he's seeing is an angel.  
"Sorry, I had to, you looked cute," He smirks as he sees Louis' cheeks tinge pink at the comment.  
"Th-Thank you?"  
"No need, you ready to go down to the living room?"  
"Yeah, for movie night, right?"  
"Yup, me and you are gonna sit on the two seater sofa, if that's okay with you, angel?"  
Louis stands up and puts his phone into his pocket, looking back at Harry and nodding.  
"Mmkay, we should get down there now then otherwise someone will steal it,"  
Harry puts the polaroid camera back on the shelf, pocketing the picture he took of Louis (he wants to keep it, okay? Louis looked like an angel) and puts his hand on Louis' lower back, guiding him to the door. It fucks him up that he could go a tiny bit lower and he'd have his hand on Louis' arse, obviously he won't do that, he's not an animal and knows Louis would probably freak out at him. And Harry doesn't want that.  
Harry guides him all the way down to the living room, only Jade, Leigh, Perrie and Jesy are there so far, and as expected, they have taken the big sofa so Harry sits down on the other one, pulling Louis down next to him. They don't speak, Louis just goes on his phone, but it's a comfortable silence, occasionally greeting people that come in and say hello to them. Harry sees Perrie looking at them a little strangely but he puts it off as to how quickly Louis has settled with Harry. (Harry tries not to let his alpha pride swell because of it, it's his main priority at the minute.)  
Once everyone has settled in their places (Zayn, Liam and Niall are on bean bags in front of Louis and Harry, Louis and Harry are essentially at the back of everybody), Gemma puts on the Avengers after some debate from everyone, which is fine by Harry and Louis.

 

\---

 

Louis wants to cuddle up to Harry _so_ badly. The movie must've been on for about 45 minutes now and Louis hasn't stopped thinking about how Harry's arms would feel around him while watching the movie. Niall has slid over to Zayn, essentially covering Zayn like a blanket. Louis sort of wants to do that to Harry. He doesn't know how comfortable he'd be doing it, though, is the thing. He craves it, yes, but his mind is trained not to like it, not to want it.  
It isn't until Harry gives him a can of Coca Cola that he does it. Harry handed him the drink then put his arm around the back of the sofa where Louis is. So Louis takes it as a hint, or encouragement, whichever. So he scoots a little closer to Harry, closing the gap between them a little bit, which causes Harry to look down at him, and for a second, Louis thinks that Harry will yell at him, but he doesn't. Harry smiles down at Louis and wraps the arm that was around the sofa around him, resting on his arm. Louis' heart jumps and races and Louis' body is telling him _alpha kind warm safe_ and his mind is telling him _run alpha broken omega_ but he stays, listens to his body not his mind.  
"Is this okay?" He hears Harry whisper, so Louis looks up at him through his lashes, holds the gaze for a few seconds because even in the dark Harry's eyes are glowing and it makes him forget what he wanted to say for a moment.  
"Yes," He finally nods, the corners of his mouth turning up gently.  
"Good," Harry whispers back, leaning forward and kissing his forehead softly, which makes Louis hide his head on Harry's chest in happiness. Now Louis is essentially laying against Harry, so he lifts his feet up onto the sofa and rests the rest of his weight against Harry.  
His heart is wild, he can hear it and he wonders if Harry can feel it because it's out of control but he can't believe he's actually fucking cuddling Harry. An _alpha_!! This is the closest he's ever been to an alpha before, the longest contact time. He's happy, and he's scared because Harry could turn at any time but for now, right now, he is happy.  
They carry on watching the movie for a while, Harry rubbing his arm gently, soothing. Louis feels his heartbeat calm down eventually, realising that this is completely normal and that it's okay. His head is against Harry's chest like it is when they hug and he can hear his heart beat and his breathing and it's so comforting and Louis could stay like this forever. Against Harry.

\---

Harry is feeling possessive as fuck. His rut is due next week, he's sure. It's worrying him because who will protect Louis while he's in rut? He knows he can control himself around omegas while in rut, but he doesn't want to scare Louis off. He'll think about that later, right now he has an armful of a beautiful omega and he's feeling like the luckiest person _and_ alpha in the world. He's rubbing his hand up and down Louis' arm but it's a little uncomfortable, the strain on his forearm is annoying, so slowly, so, so slowly he starts to slide his hand round Louis' arm, feeling the goosebumps raise on the babysoft skin. It's intimate, but it's not sexual, it's not threatening. Louis is showing no signs of hesitation so he slips his hand off his arm and onto his _tiny_ waist. He's whipped on this boys body, aesthetically, not sexually (although sexually he's sure he'd appreciate just as much).

It's so nice to feel something when near an omega. He's cuddled plenty before, but usually it's with Cara, and he just doesn't feel anything, it's just cuddling. But now, with Louis, it's almost like he can feel his alpha comforting Louis, like he can feel Louis' omega comforting him, and it's just lovely to have some sort of emotional bond with someone. Especially somebody he likes.

They stay like that for the rest of the movie, head on chest and hand stroking hip and waist softly, they stay like that until at least halfway through the third movie, when people start going to bed. That's when Louis turns around in his grip, head still on Harry's chest, back facing the screen now though. Harry can tell he's tired, he uses his free hand to stroke Louis' hair gently, hand still on his waist. Louis' blinks blearily up at him, meeting his eyes and focusing for a moment while Harry smiles down at him, before nuzzling his head back into Harry's chest and gripping his shirt in his fist lightly.

Harry realises Louis has probably never had this before. Never trusted an alpha enough. The grip on his waist tightens so, so slightly, not hurting, just possessive, the way omega's like. This is backed up by the tiny 'purr' sound from Louis' throat, it's a content little sound, lasts less than a second but Harry hears it and is so happy that Louis is content enough to make the sound when it's Harry causing it. Harry keeps the grip possessive on his waist, keeps slowly stroking Louis' fluffy hair but watches the movie now, lulling Louis' to sleep.

\--

By the end of the movie it's just Niall, Gemma and Zayn left in the room, and it's Niall who notices them first, when the DVD menu lights up the room. Harry's smiling down at Louis' sleeping face, he looks like a kitten like this, still gently stroking his hair and hand on his waist when a flash goes off.  
He looks straight up at the source, only to find Niall grinning at him like a mad-man, Gemma with an eyebrow raised and Zayn smirking at him.  
"What the fuck?" He mouths to Niall, who laughs quietly and shrugs it off, obviously not realising Harry is actually slightly annoyed at the Irish lad because he could've woken Louis up.  
"Night," Gemma smiles at Harry, after turning the TV off and turning the light on, walking out the room straight away. She's probably tired.  
"Yeah, I'll send you that picture and you'll understand why I took it," Niall says and begins to walk out, waiting for Zayn, who nods along to what Niall just said and leaves with him.

Harry usually clears up the mess after movie night but he really cannot be bothered, he's got an armful of a sleeping Louis and he just wants to stay where he is. Which he does, for at least another ten minutes. His phone vibrates in his pocket three times, before he decides he should probably get Louis up to bed, although he would happily stay on this sofa with Louis all night.

He shifts a little to get up and Louis whimpers and clenches his fist tighter on Harry's shirt, he hasn't stopped gripping it the whole time he's been asleep, and Harry can't help but think it's grounding him, as if Louis is afraid Harry isn't going to stay.  
"It's okay kitten, just taking you up to bed, you can keep sleeping," Harry says as quietly as he can, it's just a deep rumble, really, but he knows that sort of voice is nice for omegas. Louis scrunches his eyes up when Harry starts to lift him into his arms, he carries him bridal style up two sets of stairs until he's in Louis' room and gently placing Louis onto his bed. He needs to get him into his pyjamas but doesn't want to look like he's taking advantage of Louis(who hasn't let go of his shirt still).  
"Louis, darling, you need to let go and get changed into some pyjamas,"  
Louis tries to snuggle back into Harry's chest, he can make out 'warm' and 'alpha' and 'stay' in Louis' grumbles. This is the hardest thing to do.  
"Louis? Angel? Come on, please? For me?"  
He lets Louis come back from his sleep slowly. The grip on his shirt gets looser until Louis' hand eventually slides down and off Harry's chest.  
"You with me?" Harry smiles.  
Louis' head nods but his eyes are still shut.  
"Sorry for waking you my love but you need to change because I can't do that for you without permission,"  
Louis grumbles something Harry doesn't quite catch so he walks to the dresser and pulls out some pyjamas and new underwear for the smaller boy, walking back over to him and placing them in his lap. He places both hands on the sides of his face and kisses the top of his head gently.  
Harry watches as Louis places the pyjamas aside and stands up, immediately wrapping his arms around his waist and Harry wraps his around Louis' shoulders, hugging him back. They break apart a few minutes later and Harry presses one last kiss to Louis' head then leaves, shutting the door with a 'night kitten, sleep well'. He swears he hears Louis say 'stay' but perhaps it's just wishful thinking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiii! okay, so first im gonna show you some visuals  
> harry 
> 
> (harry has bun-length hair but the first pic is sometimes how i imagine his face)  
> [x](http://media.tumblr.com/ed8f02a31e4ca700bce83a98343ef09c/tumblr_inline_ms2jdlCJez1qm96e9.jpg) [x](https://38.media.tumblr.com/aeba882027f5f8bf110396d8b5129d14/tumblr_neqcusG1Mk1qevo8lo2_r1_250.gif) [x](http://www.welovepopmag.co.uk/uploaded/news/images/238B660F00000578-2851373-image-9_1417078425330.jpg) [x](https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTxkyOeFJ3Uke0s3uCClHK_19YNJxXvyNASl7OE1A3o0kOb_n5D)
> 
> louis  
> [x](https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-ash/t51.2885-15/s320x320/e15/10890885_340782782788683_204221533_n.jpg) [x](http://static.tumblr.com/6aqwpvn/ZY7m6vabc/sidebar-glasses.gif) [x](http://data.whicdn.com/images/49131053/large.jpg) [x](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRhiOXeMzTFlbYtCsen4FNkdKAkAONYUXg0vjsu1uP72WdBoqLTVg)
> 
>  


	8. you're mad thinking you could ever save me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> filler, sort of, a build up to the camp out. xx  
> 

Louis is currently in the garden with Niall and Zayn trying to play tennis. He woke up in a sad mood because he'd remembered the previous night, and how Harry had basically taken him to bed, vaguely recalling falling asleep. He hopes nobody saw him practically laying in Harry's lap, he'd be so embarrassed. He woke up without a text from Harry and Louis thinks he's scared him off. Why else would he not text him? He probably realised how much effort Louis was, Louis was grumpy and tired and didn't want to change into his pyjamas the previous night and he asked the alpha to stay. So rude, _bad omega bad omega_.  
Louis quickly realises he is shit at tennis.  
It's a warm day, warm enough to have just a tshirt on when doing exercise, and maybe just warm enough to have one on without too. The sun is warm and the wind is blowing very gently, like a cold embrace from someone you love. Good and bad in the best ways.  
Harry and Liam have been setting up the tent since after breakfast. Apparently it's a huge tent according to Niall. They keep walking back and forth from the house and down the long garden and through a little gate that leads into the field behind, carrying bags full of sleeping bags and food in their arms each trip. (Louis doesn't get distracted looking at Harrys biceps every time. Nothing sexual. Just, his omega telling him that Harry can protect you, Harry will protect you.)  
Harry keeps smiling at him but still hasn't spoken to him. Or texted him. _He is only smiling out of kindness_.  
He still doesn't know whether he is going to go to the camp out, doesn't know if he'll feel welcome or if he'll just feel like an outsider, especially if Harry doesn't speak to him by the evening. Yes, the house has 'groups' of people, like who they hang around with and whatnot but they all generally get along from what he has seen.  
Take breakfast for example, Perrie threw a grape at Jade and it ended up missing and hitting Max, Max ended up catching it as it fell and throwing it directly at Gemma, who promptly threw it at Harry, (missing horrendously and hitting the cabinet behind him) but it felt like everyone could get along as friends. Maybe even family. Sort of.  
He's distracted from his thoughts after a tennis ball hits him in the leg, actually hurting quite a bit but he laughs it off and hits it back to Zayn who is giggling at him, Niall and Louis were on a team against Zayn so Louis walks off to the side and sits in a chair. He pulls out his phone and takes a picture of Zayn and Niall playing tennis, getting quite a cool shot and uploads it to instagram, tagging them and putting the caption as ' **I suck at tennis** '  
\--  
Louis and Niall end up going up to Louis' room after playing tennis for a while. Louis kept getting distracted and Niall and Zayn kept on laughing at him. Louis ended up laughing at himself a lot too. He's sat on his bed with Niall flopped out next to him, just thinking about how good thing would have been if he'd have been 'rescued' earlier, if he'd had this kind of enjoyment earlier on in his life. He hopes that his younger siblings join him or go somewhere better soon because he only wants them to have the best in life.  
"They're some nice polaroids, mate!" Niall says, almost breaking his neck to look at them behind him while he's still lying down. Louis' cheeks pink up, realising they're all of himself and Harry.  
"We should- we should take one, if you want, I mean?" Louis' looking at his camera, he needs more pictures, so he thinks he'll take it to the camp out if he does go.  
"Yeah! Go get your camera!" Niall seems happy about taking a picture.  
They end up taking three, one where they're both laying down on the bed, one pulling a funny face and one where Niall started tickling Louis as he was about to take it. (That one is both of their favourites.)  
"You and Harry are so good together," Niall says nonchalantly.  
"We aren't... we're not like... together... though?"  
"Oh no! I know. I mean you just look good together, and act good and all that jazz," He's looking through his phone and Louis is just staring at him.  
"What do you mean?"  
"I'm just gonna send you a picture to back myself up here,"  
Louis' phone pings from the bed and once he looks at it he is mortified. It's a picture of him and Harry from last night on the sofa. He's cuddled right up and Harry is looking down at him. Granted he doesn't look annoyed but Louis is so embarrassed that he actually did that and people saw.  
"Okay, so you see the way he looks at you? He ain't never looked at anybody like that, like ever. Never shown anybody s'much interest as he's shown you, I reckon he'd move heaven and earth for you if you asked. It's not even just an alpha and omega thing, I don't think anyway. I think he really likes ya, as Louis 'n' Harry, as well as alpha 'n' omega, ya know?"  
All Louis can reply is a simple yes. He's the second person that's told him that Harry likes him so far, and Louis is beginning to believe it, but he's not sure if that's a good or a bad thing.  
He listens to Niall speak about what he thinks love is and what he thinks relationships are about and he finds it super interesting. His mother never really spoke about 'love' in a romantic sense, and he was pulled out of school too early to have learnt from his friends. Stan sometimes spoke about a girlfriend he had or a girl he had a crush on but Louis never really experienced crushes. He wonders if what he feels for Harry is a crush or whether he's just liking him because he's the only alpha that's cared for him.  
Niall eventually shuts up and Louis is somewhat grateful, it's almost time for lunch so Louis and he just chill for a while longer. Louis let's his thoughts run wild for a while, wondering what Harry thinks of him, of his looks, his personality, heck, even the way he talks. Louis knows he stutters, hates the fact because he can't help it, but he wonders what Harry thinks of it and whether it annoys him. He wonders whether he would ever tell Harry what happened in the past, wonders if Harry genuinely does like him like everybody has been saying. Everybody meaning Zayn and Niall. He wonders what Harry thinks when he freaks out, or when he isn't as submissive as an omega probably should be, or if he is too submissive.  
He wants to know all these things.

\---

It's _too_ fucking hot. Harry is so busy and he's not had any time to go on his phone today. He usually has Cara and Liam's help when putting up the tent but today he only has Liams and he never realised how much harder things are with only _one_ less person but it _is_ and he's fucking stressed. He just wants to cuddle up to Louis and speak to him and kiss him but he _can't_. It's extremely frustrating. He hasn't even had time to text him today, see, Harry has a mindset in which, when he talks to someone, especially someone that he cares a lot about, he thinks that they deserve his _full_ attention. He doesn't like to text someone for a conversation and then have them wait for him to reply. He thinks that it's unfair on the person he is texting.  
So here he is, scoffing down his lunch so that he and Liam can finish setting up the tent, they probably won't get all of the sleeping bags and pillows laid out because Cara does that usually, but they'll probably be able to put them in their respective 'rooms'. You'd expect it to be super noisy when everybody goes to bed, but surprisingly it isn't that loud. You can generally only hear low murmurs, no distinct words unless someone is talking particularly loud. He loves the tent but its an absolute bitch to get up, and down, it hardly seems worth it for just one night but that's all most people are comfortable with. Besides, he usually ends up taking it down a few days after it goes up because sometimes people like to chill in their rooms. Harry sincerely hopes that Louis is going to join them, and that he's going to sleep in the same room as him. He wants to cuddle him, keep him in his sights when he's not in Skylar.  
It takes Liam and him about three more hours to get the tent up and ready, they do end up managing to roll out the sleeping bags for everybody. He needs a shower, _badly_ , even the wind wasn't enough to stop him sweating buckets while putting up the tent, the sun not being much help either. He doesn't want to cuddle up to Louis while smelling like he just ran a marathon, alpha smell is attractive to Louis, not sweat.  
He's up in his room now, getting his clothes ready for after his shower and getting some bits ready to take down to the tent. (He makes sure to put an extra blanket in there for Louis in case he doesn't want Harry to cuddle him and gets cold.)  
Harry knows these next few days he's going to be clingy as fuck to Louis, the days leading up to his rut. He's scared, obviously, because although he has a lot of self control, he doesn't know how he will act around Louis, because of the fact that he's never been affected before. He needs to release some pressure. Being away from Louis during the day was extremely difficult. He shoves all the extra bits in a bag and puts it by his door. He glances out of the window and sees Niall getting the barbecue ready, everyone will start making their way down any time soon, Liam's barbecues last all night. Zayn is setting up some cushions and fetching wood for the small fire they have every year.  
Picking up his phone and a change of clothes, he walks into the bathroom, he decides to text Louis.

_Just having a shower little one, I smell awful. Do you want me to come into your room afterwards? xx_

His phone vibrates three times on the unit not long after he switches the water on to warm up

**Louis.**  
_of course :)_  
_I mean if you want to_  
_if not then that's cool .. :)_

Harry frowns. What would make Louis say that? Perhaps because he was busy all day? And Louis thinks he still is? Or perhaps Harry hasn't been as obvious with his 'crush' as he should be. Either way, the messages confuse him. He decides to ignore it and just go straight into Louis' room after his shower, to show him rather than tell him that of course he wants to see him.  
He strips out of his clothes and throws them into his room locking the door behind him and stepping into the shower. He makes quick work of washing his hair, wondering whether he should get it cut soon. He's curious as to whether Louis likes his hair or if he thinks it's stupid. Has Louis even thought about his hair? He carries on washing himself, lathering up the bubbles over himself. His thoughts don't leave Louis though. He thinks about the younger boys hair, trying (and failing) to not think explicit thoughts about the boy. It's going to become increasingly difficult for his thoughts not to drift to something sexual over the coming days because of his rut. He thinks that it'd probably be best to get off now so he doesn't wake up pressing his dick to Louis' arse through their pyjamas.  
Harry's dick perks up at the thought. Has been somewhat interested since he was trying not to think of Louis bouncing on it with his hair falling over his eyes. He thinks it's probably creepy to jerk off to someone in the shower but he's not an animal, and this is a necessity to not scare Louis off with his dick in the next few days.  
His carries on washing himself, rubbing his hands over his chest, shutting his eyes and imagining it's Louis' tiny hands instead. He leans back against the tiled wall and hisses at the cold contrast on his back from the steamy room. He trails his hands down his chest, over his stomach and takes his dick in his hand, not gripping it just yet, teasing himself. He wonders how different Louis' hands would feel on him, curious strokes and his eyes staring into his. He bites his lip and runs his hand to the head and back down slowly, gripping slightly tighter at the head. Repeating the action he tilts his head back to rest against the wall, imagining Louis in his arms, against the wall, Harry's face pressed into Louis' neck, nuzzling the bond mark. He groans lowly at the thought, the rumble starting in his chest and his hand speeds up, there's electricity pumping through his limbs and he's desperately chasing a well needed release. His hips start rolling into his fist as he grips his bottom lip between his teeth, trying to stifle his groans because Louis is just in the next room. _Fuck._ Louis is _only_ next door. He breathes in deeply, catching Louis' scent and pops his knot, coming all over his fist with a grunt probably too loud.

\---

The room smells like candles and Louis' cursing himself for not lighting any in the previous days that he's been at Skylar. He wonders if his scent has begun to settle in the room yet. His room. He wonders if it's even been long enough yet, or if he's even comfortable enough for it to settle. He's never been comfortable enough for his scent to settle anywhere. He wonders what it smells like to others, other omegas, alphas and betas. (He makes a sidenote to ask Niall and Zayn a little later on, and _maybe_ Harry. Maybe.)

Harry is in the shower, when he'd texted Louis asking if he'd wanted him to go into his room, Louis was confused. Why would Harry not even text him all day but then ask that? Louis had panicked, assuming that Harry was going to tell him he's not going to be as nice as he has been, Louis sleeping on him was probably the last straw for Harry. However, that didn't seem to be the case, judging by the friendly method of texting Harry had used. Louis is nervous either way, Harry is going to be in his room again, just the two of them, and it might be the only time he'll get to see him over the next two days because of the campout, if Louis doesn't go.  
He wonders what it's like, whether the groups are still present when they're in a different situation than what they're used to.  
He gets lost in his thoughts when a persistent knocking on the bathroom door shakes him from his thoughts. He scrambles off of his bed and to his desk mirror, checking his hair and then to open the bathroom door. It's much more personal when Harry and him use the bathroom doors to see each other.  
Swinging the door open, his breathe is almost ripped from his chest because a shirtless and slightly damp Harry is standing in front of him, with the steam from the room flowing into his vision. Harry flashes him a smile and Louis notices his scent then. It's fucking glorious, he wants to wrap himself up in it and live in it forever. His stomach flips and he can't even remember if he remembers his own name because Harry's here, shirtless and smells like everything Louis' ever dreamed of.  
"Is it alright if I don't wear a shirt for a bit?"  
Louis nods, not trusting his voice, because why would it ever not be okay for Harry to be shirtless? Why does he even _wear_ shirts? He's got like, tattoos, two swallows on his chest, a moth... butterfly? On his stomach and Louis knew he had tattoos on his arm but he didn't know that they went all the way up and across his shoulders. It's extremely attractive.  
He moves out the way of the door, finally, letting Harry into the room. Harry walks past him slowly, leans in and kisses his forehead as he shuts the door behind him and places a hand gentle on his shoulder as he does so. Louis still can't think straight. Like this, he can see all his muscles. All he can think is _safesafesafe_ which is the complete opposite to what he's ever thought when he's seen an alpha shirtless. It was ' _look at how much they can hurt you with those muscles_ ' but with Harry it's nothing like that. The thoughts are there but they're not prominent, not making him panic.  
"Thanks, I get a rash on my chest if I put a shirt on immediately, I dunno why, it's annoying,"  
"That-That's okay," Louis finally manages to string at least two words together, looking up into Harry's eyes and turning the corners of his lips up in a cute little smile.  
"How are you, sweets?" Harry guides Louis to sit on the bed with the hand he had on his shoulder. Louis' glad that the window is open because he fears if Harry's scent were any stronger he'd actually just climb onto his lap and koala hug him.  
"I'm er, yeah, good... Thanks," He decides not to mention how he's been scared all day that Harry had gotten bored of him.  
"Good," Harry takes a seat across the bed from him, "Been up to much today?"  
"Um, yeah. I played tennis for a while, I'm pretty sure you saw how bad I am, and I chilled in here with Niall for a bit," Louis swears he hears Harry mumble something like 'I can tell...' or was it _smell_? "And we ate lunch and then I showered and then I decided to study for a while, and like, that's when you texted me..."  
"Sounds like a pretty decent day, kitten,"  
Louis wonders if it would be weird if he took a Polaroid of Harry right now, Niall left the camera on his bedside table... _Fuck it_ he thinks for pretty much the first time in his life and reaches for the camera, smiling cheekily at Harry who raises an eyebrow with a smirk.  
"Smile!"  
Louis grins as the flash goes off, catching Harry mid laugh. He waits for the picture to eject then watches as it develops and the outcome is incredible, he can't even believe he is sat in the same room as this godlike excuse of a human. _notworthy_.

"We should take another one together, let me go get my Polaroid, it's vintage, bigger pictures, be right back, love!" Louis glances up to watch Harry leave through the bathroom and then looks back down at the picture he just took of Harry. It's honesty so gorgeous. Louis wants to keep it in his notebook, wants to write so many things about it, wants to see Harry like that everyday for the rest of his life. He just wants to see Harry everyday for the rest of his life, actually.  
He can't believe he's found an alpha he feels safe near. Can't believe he's found a home. Home.  
(He's not sure if he's talking about Skylar or Harry more.)

He gets up to put the camera back on his shelf and Harry comes back in then, holding an old looking camera. It looks so expensive. Louis stays stood up as Harry settles down on the bed, sitting where Louis was before, against the headboard and all the pillows. He spreads his legs and pats the space between them gesturing for Louis to come sit between them.  
"Is this okay?" He asks once Louis moves closer.  
Louis nods, a little embarrassed.  
"Good, come on then kitten, gonna take some cute pictures. Been looking for a reason to use the last of the film to get a new pack out,"  
Louis is slow as he sits between Harry's legs. Harry grips his hips gently and Louis' heart must go mad. He's pulling him back calmly until Harry's chest is against his back and Louis _melts_ into the contact as Harry wraps both his arms around Louis' waist and hugs him, resting his head on his shoulder.  
Louis fights the urge to move, fights the urge to move Harry's hands from his waist. It's so protective, though, so safe that he settles on placing his hands over Harry's and closes his eyes. 

His step dad always told him he was fat, that it's one of the reasons nobody will ever love him, that omegas shouldn't be fat, shouldn't even be male. It made Louis cry a lot. More than he cares to admit. He realises that being fat isn't a bad thing and that nobody should ever feel guilty about being larger, but after having years of someone telling him he won't be loved because of it really doesn't give you much reason to love it. He's got stubborn tummy fat, no matter how much his step dad would starve him, no matter how much he'd starve himself, it would never go. He's got a huge ass and his thighs are too big. He's always felt he takes up too much room, that he's wasting space and that his mind is smaller than his physical being. He likes to feel invisible. It's how he's comfortable.

Right now, Harry is making him feel like the only boy he's ever laid hands on, doesn't even seem to notice his stomach fat, and if he does, he doesn't mention it, just takes it as it is. He can feel his breath against his neck, slow and soothing, the way it's curling over his skin. He feels like he's worth something. _It's only a hug._  
Harry squeezes him tight, briefly and kisses his shoulder before grabbing the camera next to them. Louis swears he feels it burn through his t-shirt and straight to his skin. He wants Harrys lips on his skin. _Shit._

Harry still has his arms around Louis as he looks over his shoulder to turn the camera on. Louis feels so _small_ like this. Harry can see perfectly over his shoulder as Louis rests in between his legs. He's pretty sure Harry could rest his head on top of his. Louis' heart flutters at the thought.  
"Okay, the camera is ready, are you?" Louis notices Harry lowers his voice the closer he gets to someone. And right now, with his mouth basically next to his ear, Harry's speech is _so_ slow and _so_ deep and _so_ drawled that he may as well just be humming. Louis swears it rumbles through his entire being. He almost forgets to answer. He just nods.

Harry raises the camera with one arm to point at them and counts down from three, pressing the button on the front of the camera and blinding them both with the flash. He's still topless, Louis realises. There's only one item of clothing between Harry's bare chest and his back. He wants to take it off. He doesn't know why. Perhaps it's primal, to crave skin contact. Louis doesn't even know if he's comfortable being topless but he imagines it being Harry would help the situation a lot. Harry's got his arms around his stomach again, as though he can't help but put them there, but that's probably wishful thinking from Louis. It's probably just where it's most comfortable for Harry's arms to rest.  
"Oh wow. Look at that," Harry mumbles. Louis looks away from where his crossed legs are dwarfed between Harry's muscley outstretched legs, to the picture in Harry's hands. It's just started developing, just managing to sharpen their features, the shadows forming faster. It already looks so good, they look like a couple. _No_ , scratch that, they look like _mates_.  
The picture is gorgeous when it fully develops. They both look gorgeous, facial features defined, happy. You can see the arm Harry used to hold the camera, the hand that Louis wrapped around the outside Harry's bicep as he took it. His hand looks tiny. Harry looks _so_ alpha, all muscles and charm and dominant. Louis looks _so_ omega. So small and fluffy and submissive.  
"You look beautiful, little one," Louis leans to the side and looks at Harry, twisting his head towards his face, only meeting his eyes for a second before looking back down at the picture.  
"You're pretty," Louis says as he lifts Harry's arm so the picture is closer to his face. He doesn't know how else to describe him. He is pretty, but he's so alpha in the photo and Louis doesn't know if he can even handle it right now. He's _in_ this alphas arms, right now.  
Harry lowers his head, just barely letting his lips brush across Louis' bare skin where his shirt has slipped off his shoulder. It's so soft, breath fanning his shoulder and Louis' heart rate rockets. He never knew how much he'd like Harrys lips on his skin. And the way that Harry is moving is like he can't help himself, moving his lips slowly back and forth, as though he's addicted to the feeling of Louis' skin against them.  
Louis' still as his lips move closer to his neck, and the distance feels like a million miles rather than just a few inches. Harry is breathing slightly heavier now, not changing the tiny amount of pressure between his lips and Louis' skin.  
"Kitten," Harry breathes out, the word wrapping around Louis' shoulder, curling round his entire being and filling his mind with nothing but hazy thoughts.  
Louis can't help his next action, can't help letting his head fall back to rest against Harrys shoulder, essentially _baring_ his neck to the alpha, an invitation to bond him. Harry lets out a little rumble, so quiet that if Louis were any further away he doesn't think he'd hear it. He can't think of anything but Harry Harry Harry and how his arms are squeezing his body closer and Harry's topless and so so strong and there's a little rumble in his chest and it's so alpha, so possessive.  
But then Harrys lips aren't there anymore, aren't letting out little puffs of air on his neck, breathing in deeply as though he's trying to memorise Louis' scent. Harry's talking, who is he talking to? Why isn't he concentrating on Louis? Louis makes a little disgruntled sound, a frown on his face as he brings his head back up from Harry's shoulder. He sort of wants to cry until Harry pulls his body back against his as Louis moved to get up, he uses his free hand to keep Louis there, rubbing his thigh and stomach and running it through his hair. It makes Louis melt back into Harry again, loving the way Harry seems to not notice all the things Louis hates himself for.  
He carries on with the soothing touches until he finishes on the phone. Louis let's him.

\---

Harry isn't sure if his upcoming rut is getting to him or just Louis. Liam's telling him he's forgotten or lost a pack of burgers which means that six people are going to have to go without.  
"Yeah, no, I'll nip shop, no bother, yeah, that's fine, don't worry," Harry isn't really paying much attention, too focused on the way that Louis is letting him run his free hand all over, not sexually, just comforting. Harry can't believe that Louis has just let him do what he did. He isn't sure if it's a good thing or not. He probably shouldn't have, he knows he won't lose control but the idea behind it is there, Louis all but _bared_ his neck for Harry, intentional or not, Harry is probably the first person Louis has ever bared his neck for.  
He exits the phone call, probably too eagerly but Liam's known for talking ago little too long and Harry wants to give Louis the attention he deserves.  
Throwing his phone back down on the bed he wraps both his arms around Louis again, who makes a pleased noise and wriggles back into the touch.  
"So I have to nip shop, do you want to come? We can take a walk up?" He asks Louis.  
"Um. Do you want me to? Like go with y-"  
"Of course I do, come on, kitten, let's go shop,"  
Harry waits for Louis to stand up before standing up himself and grabbing his phone, a message from Liam popping up saying ' _you sure you know what your getting lol_ '  
He sends back _Burgers. Six._ and pockets his phone, giving Louis his attention again. He looks nervous, why is he nervous? Harry cant smell the nerves so it isn't that bad but he can see him, he's rubbing his palms down his thighs, looking round like he doesn't quite know what to do with himself. He just wants him to be comfortable. Perhaps he went too far.  
Harry slips his shirt on, grabs his camera and puts it round his neck, adjusting the straps so that it hung just above his stomach. He takes the photo they just took into his room and puts it on his bed, and goes back to Louis' room. He ends up guiding Louis to his door with a hand on Louis' lower back. He can't help but want physical contact, some way or another, he knows that's because of his rut but if he's completely honest, he'd probably always find some way to be physically touching Louis, even when he's not due a rut. Maybe it's an alpha thing. Most of this is new to him because of never being affected by an omega before. He isn't sure.

\--

"Are you coming to the camp out, love?"  
They're waking to the shop, it's quite warm, the sun still bright, but it's on its way down. They've been walking close to each other, Harry's hand on Louis' hip, holding him close.  
"I don't know," Harry feels Louis try and pull away a little. He lets him.  
"Come get on my back,"  
"What?" Louis looks confused.  
"I'll give you a piggy back,"  
"I'm too fa- No, I can walk,"  
"Were you about to say you're fat?" Harrys stops, eyes narrowed in anger and confusion. Louis takes a step back, looking down at his feet.  
"No,"  
"Yes you were, come here, it's okay," Harry reaches his hand out slowly, making sure it doesn't look like he will hurt Louis.  
Louis looks up slowly first, barely meeting Harry's eyes before he looks straight back down at Harry's hand.  
"It's okay," Harry says again, giving a comforting smile even though Louis can't see. He watches as Louis takes his hand, then rearranges them so that they're holding hands and starts walking again. He's trying to make this seem as normal as possible.  
"You know you're not fat, little one?" Harry tries to make it seem casual, it's the truth, curvy and fat are different things. Louis just makes a noise like a scoff.  
"Seriously, you're not, you're a little curvy but in the best way possible, I promise," Harry continues. Louis just looks up at him.  
"Even if you were, that would be okay. I'd still like you just as much as I do now,"  
It gets a smile out of Louis, at least. It's a 'I don't believe you, but that was cute,' kind of smile, but at least it's something.  
They talk casually until they get to the shop, as they were before, Harry finds out that Louis doesn't like the concept of eating meat and has always wanted to stop, but he didn't get enough food or substitutes for meat where he was before. Harry tells him that he can stop eating meat whenever he wants at Skylar, and him and his mother and sister would all support him. Eleanor tried it once, only lasted a few weeks but they bought her the substitute meats, quorn and such, with the shopping. He also finds out that Louis is especially terrified of spiders and that his favourite film is Donnie Darko and would watch it whenever he could. Harry adds it to his Amazon basket immediately, realising they didn't buy it when they went shopping for Louis the other day. He doesn't mind spending his money on Louis, he has a lot more because he technically 'works' at Skylar. His dad pays him, and Gemma for working, his mum and dad have a joint bank account, so Harry gets a significant amount more than the occupants.  
Once in the shop they grab the burgers, Harry ends up buying some iced biscuits just for him and Louis in their bit of the tent, if Louis decides to come and stay in Harry's 'room'. He also buys a few drinks for tonight, there is some at the house, fizzy and squash but Harry fancied a Monster Energy and he asked Louis which one he'd like. He chose Irn Bru.

On the way back, Louis accepts a piggy back, letting Harry carry him on his back while they speak and drink their drinks. He was still reluctant at first but Harry keeps hearing him giggle and it's the sweetest sound ever. He wants it to be his alarm, ringtone, text tone, everything.  
"Okay, I'm gonna need you to take a picture, babe, you okay with that?" Harry has both arms wrapped around Louis' thighs to keep him up, and a can of Monster clenched in one of his hands behind him. Louis giggles and accepts, picking the camera up from around Harrys neck and wrapping the strap round his wrist. He opens the lens up and points it at them, thumb on the shutter, ready to press.  
"You should- You count down, when you're ready," Louis says, then Harry feels a piece of hair being tugged a little.  
"Okay, 3, 2, 1-" Grinning on 1, he gets blinded by a flash and then the tugging sensation is gone and Louis is unwrapping the strap and placing it around Harry's neck again.  
Harry's still walking, they're almost home now. Louis giggles from above him again so Harry looks down at the picture that's about halfway developed and can't help but let out a chuckle. Louis had used a piece of hair as a moustache, pouting to keep it in place, it looks horribly domestic and Harry fucking _loves_ it.  
"Will you come to the camp out love? You can stay in my bit of the tent with me, or without me, or with Niall, I don't mind,"  
"I don't know,"  
"Why not?"  
"I'm not like, one of you, and I don't want to like, like, I don't know, intrude,"  
"You're not intruding, you're invited. Plus I just personally invited you. I want you to come,"  
"Really?" Louis sounds unsure, still blissfully unaware how _gone_ Harry is for him.  
"Serious. You can stay with me the whole time if you wanted, or Zayn or whoever,"  
"You,"  
"Me, what?"  
"I'd like to stay with you? If that, if it's okay with you?"  
Harry grins and hitches Louis up from where he was sliding down his back, probably not concentrating on staying up because of nerves.  
"More than fine, kitten. Does that mean you want to stay in the same room? I don't mind if not,"  
Louis stays quiet for a moment, Harry realises he's probably never slept in the same room as an alpha.  
"Yes. Please,"  
Harry is over the moon, one, that Louis is coming, two, that Louis wants to stay with him the whole time, and three, that he wants to sleep in the same room as Harry.  
All three together make Harry's heart sour and his alpha _very_ happy. He can't wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to include the camp out in this chapter, I've got some good stuff coming for y'all ♥  
> P.s, thank you ryanne and annalee for helping me with motivation and ideas for this chapter ily


	9. hold me til the end

"Louis! You decided to come!" Niall grins, looking up from where he's starting a fire as he hears the gate open into the field.  
Louis smiles back, not wanting to shout across to him but knowing he could see his answering smile. Harry's hand is on his lower back, where Louis has found it resting more and more lately. He doesn't feel threatened by it, doesn't feel like it's dominating, particularly, but it's definitely something he isn't used to. It's almost... comforting. Both Harry and Louis' backpacks were on Harry's back, with all of their overnight stuff in. Louis was reluctant to let Harry carry his at first, saying that he'd be perfectly fine holding it himself, ' _it's only a few flights of stairs don't worry_ ' but Harry had insisted ' _I want to do this for you, it's fine, honestly_ '. Louis ignored the butterflies flaring up his insides at the fact Harry _wanted_ to do that for him.  
They walk past Niall and the girls chatting near him, he's nervous, he's not used to social events at all, and it's a little different from being at the dinner table with everyone there. Plus Cara will be here, which he isn't looking forward to. Last time he saw her, she was giving him a death stare because Harry stormed off from the table.  
Their room in the tent is on the end, closest to the 'entrance'. Harry tells him it's Zayn and Niall next to them, and Cara and Lydia across the 'hall' area. Louis steps into their room after Harry does and ends up grinning. There's a mound of blankets and sleeping bags on the floor, some snacks at the side, next to which, Harry ends up putting their bags down. Louis places their pillows on top of the blankets for later. He can't stop smiling to himself. It's actually so cute, and Louis is very excited. He's never been camping before.  
"What are you smiling at, love?"  
Louis looks up at Harry who is grinning back at him.  
"It's just... pretty... it's cute. I'm excited," Louis looks around the room again, he tries to ignore the fact he didn't see any other blankets or fairy lights through the doors of the other rooms. _This is special._  
"Wait until it's dark, even I've not seen the fairy lights on in the dark, Gemma let me have them 'cause she took them down a while ago. Have you been camping before?"  
Louis shakes his head, no. He wonders if Harry planned on having the fairy lights even if Louis didn't come to the camp out. ' _What if he did this for me_ '? ( _Don't be stupid, you're not worth this, he doesn't want you_ ).  
"You ready to go out there? We can stay in here if you want, if you're not comfortable?"  
"Erm, no, it's okay,"  
"Okay, love, come on then," Louis follows Harry out of the tent and into the field. He can already see what they mean about it being a freeing experience, even with the small distance between them and the house. Niall must have gotten the fire started properly while they were in the tent, almost everybody is here now, Louis notices. The only people that Louis doesn't think are there yet are Liam, Sophia and Cara and Lydia.

\--

"Oh, yeah! Remember last year when Niall ran across the field naked?" There's a chorus of laughs, and an embarrassed Niall giggling along, face bright red.  
"I got fifty quid out of it, how could I complain? It's not as bad as when Perrie pissed herself!" He doubles over laughing at the memory, and a few metres away Louis hears Perrie shout ' _Oi!_ ' but it doesn't seem like she's actually offended. Louis' enjoying himself, the sun is low, casting a haze of colours over the camping area. It's technically still summer, even though this is the Autumn campout. Harry explained they do it every time the seasons change, so four times a year, he'd told him they try and avoid the rain, just in case of flooding, and that they like to keep things such as the tent as clean as they can, which Louis can understand.  
He's not entirely sure what he should be doing, is this all camping is? Sitting round and telling memories? And food, later, obviously. The more he dwells on the fact that everybody is just sharing memories, the more he feels like he doesn't belong, even if he is having fun listening to them, even giggling at a lot of them. Everyone is on blankets on the grass, cushions lining the blankets and bottles of water and snacks dotted around. Louis is munching on some smarties, sharing them with Harry, who's laughing along with everybody else. They're on the same blanket and Louis is sure Harry gave him more cushions on purpose but he chooses not to mention it.  
Louis can't help but keep glancing at Cara and Lydia, they're gay, and nobody seems to care, not even that they're cuddling with each other. But then, Louis thinks, Cara is a _female_ omega. Even if they were fine with Cara being gay, they might still have a problem with Louis being gay. He's only come out to Zayn so far, officially. He knows everyone probably assumes he's gay, because he is a male and omega and it’s just more likely that he is. He wonders if Harry thinks he's gay, wonders if Harry _hopes_ he's gay.  
_Of course he doesn't, he can do better than you_.  
Louis decides he wants to try and come out to Harry. He doesn't know when or how but he wants to. 

\---

"Hey love, how you feeling?" Harry leans over and speaks quietly in Louis' ear. They've all eaten, Liam making quality food over the fire. Harry noticed that Louis hadn't eaten much but they had enough food back in their room of the tent for him not to be worried.  
"Good! How about you?" Louis turned his head to face Harry, they're considerably closer together than earlier, probably from when Harry sat back down after getting them both some food.  
"I'm all good, warm enough?"  
Harry watches as Louis frowns for a moment, before answering.  
"I'm... I'm a little chilly?"  
Harry doesn't blame him, the sun was almost completely set, temperature dropping from the summer heat during the day.  
"Here, have my sweater," Harry's already shrugging it off before Louis can even say no. He'd somewhat hoped that this would happen, wore the jumper he's wearing purposely, so that if Louis did get cold then he'd wear it. It's Harry's favourite of all his that he owns. It's a huge, light grey sweater, rather thin material, it gives _him_ sweater paws, and he can't wait to see it on Louis. Granted, when Harry imagined Louis wearing it, he was wearing nothing but underwear and the sweater, but _hey_ Harry can live with a pair of jeans cockblocking his dreams coming to life.  
Louis looks shy as he accepts it from Harry.  
_"It's fine, I'm not that cold, keep it,"_  
_"Take it, I'm not cold at all._  
Harry watches as he shrugs it over his head and can't help the possesive alpha flare up inside him, seeing his omega in his clothes. _His omega._  
Louis pulls the sleeves over his hands and wraps them around his own waist.  
"Better?"  
"Much. Thank you," Louis smiles at up at him and hotches closer to lean his head onto Harry's shoulder and Harry wraps an arm round his side.  
He takes a moment to look around; nobody has noticed them both, like it's just normal, natural for them to be in that position. As if sensing that Harry was looking round, Cara glances up at him and smiles like she just watched Harry hang the moon for Louis. Harry smiles back and watches as she wraps both arms around Lydia, burying her head in her chest.

They stay like that for a long time, still mainly just listening to the conversations, and joining in when they feel like it, Louis considerably less so than Harry. Harry notices that Louis only really joins in when it's Niall, Zayn, Liam or himself who is 'leading' the conversations. Which is... Understandable, he guesses. They're the only people he's really had any time of getting used to. Harry's been looking off at the sky when he notices that not everybody is still in the group. In fact, it's only Louis and himself, Niall, Perrie, Jade and Leigh left outside. He doesn't remember anybody but Cara and Lydia going into the tent but hey, it's quieter now. Niall and Perrie are loud, naturally, always filling up a room whenever they're in it, leading the people in it with such ease. They're loud now, but it's a different kind of noise than everyone speaking over each other like earlier. He looks at Louis, who's still listening to the conversation, looking slightly awed at everything Perrie and Niall can banter about. He seems to be more comfortable now, his body language is much more relaxed, so he thinks he might like the girls, perhaps even be able to get close to them as he gets to know them more. Which is good. Harry wants Louis to feel comfortable around everyone, eventually. But Harry thinks that getting Louis comfortable when it’s just the two of them is his top priority until further notice.

Harry's still looking down at Louis when he tries to hide a yawn in Harry's chest, while he has his face pressed there, Harry decides to lay down against the pillows they have behind them, bringing Louis down with him with the arm still wrapped around his waist.  
"Sorr-" Louis begins, starting to try and pull away. Harry just tightens his arm around his waist, reassuring and keeping him in place.  
"It's okay, back aches is all, you can stay there if you want," Harry hasn't taken his eyes off Louis' face the whole time, still doesn't as Louis smiles and moves to get comfortable against his side. They end up with Louis' chest pressed to Harry's side, half laying on him, with one leg over Harry's and head on his chest. Harry lets his grip loosen, moving his hand from his waist to the dip in Louis' back. _Chill._ Harry thinks to himself. There's still two layers of fabric between his hand and Louis' skin but he could just slide his hand down and he'd have his hands on Louis' arse.  
"You had fun?" He can tell Louis is starting to get tired, his eyes are slightly droopy and he's not really looking at anything. He nods in return, burying his face further into Harry's chest and bringing his arm up to cover it. His hand starts playing with the strands of Harry's hair that had fell out of his bun, twirling them around his finger, Harry starts rubbing his hand on Louis' back, down to where it begins to curve out into his bum, but no further, and back up to the dip.  
"Good, I'm glad, do you want to go in?" As much as he doesn't want to move, he knows that Louis needs to get changed and he doesn’t want to have to wake him up.  
"Yeah," It's muffled but it's definitely a yes.  
"Alright then, little one, let's get to bed," He uses his stomach muscles to pull them both up, Louis taking a moment to gather his bearing as Harry picks up their water bottles and the left overs of their food, which to be honest, is mainly just biscuits.  
Harry is walking with his hand on Louis' waist, guiding him, as usual.  
"Night guys, we're off. Don't forget to put the fire out, whoever comes in last, okay?"  
"Yip, will do, my man! Night, and night Louis," Niall replies. There's a chorus of 'night Louis' after that, and Louis replies with the cutest 'goodnight' plus sweater paw wave Harry has _ever_ seen in his life. 

They make their way into their room of the tent and Harry immediately switches the fairy lights on, and it's _breath taking_ to watch and hear Louis gasp in awe of them. They're all different colours, but soft, so soft, very Louis. Louis who is curling up as much as he can into Harry's side while staring at the lights with all the blankets around. It looks like a scene from a cliché teen movie.  
"It's so beautiful!" Louis exclaims. And Harry feels like such a cliché when he thinks ' _yes you are_ '.  
"Do you need some privacy to change?"  
"Are you not getting changed?" Louis looks confused.  
"I sleep in my boxers. Most of the time. If that's okay with you?" Harry avoids saying that he sometimes sleeps naked.  
"Oh. Okay then. You could just, look the other way? I will only be a moment?"  
"Sure you don't want me to leave, love? I don't mind," Harry rubs his hand up Louis' back for reassurance.  
"No. It's fine, you can stay, if you promise not to look?"  
"I would never unless you wanted me to, little one, go get changed."  
Harry thinks that perhaps he went a little bit far with that comment, until Louis shyly smiles up at him before pulling away to get changed. Harry goes about zipping their 'door' shut and moving the sleeping bags and blankets so that they're not too close together, which is still pretty close. He makes sure that Louis has more blankets, because Harry has always ran warm, especially while sleeping so he's probably going to be warm tonight. They're both sleeping on the left side of the room, which joins onto nobody else. It's probably a little bit more private, nobody can listen through the walls.  
"Done!" Harry hears Louis say from behind him, he finishes up the blanket then turns round to meet an adorable sight.  
"Hi," Louis gives him a timid smile, he's in some shorts and a vest, looking quite cold. Omegas generally run at lower temperatures than alphas, which is one of the reasons they're almost constantly pressing up to their alpha for warmth, as well as protection and love and attention.  
"Hey, you look lovely. Are you cold?"  
Louis nods, embarrassed, "I think I should have packed warmer pyjamas..."  
"Nah, it's okay, I'm sure you'll be fine in the sleeping bag. Do you want to wear my jumper to bed?"  
Louis looks behind him at the jumper he'd been wearing of Harry's, neatly folded on top of Harry's backpack.  
"Would that not be weird?"  
"Not at all, I like you wearing it, knowing that it's keeping you warm,"  
_And that it's mixing my scent with your scent and it looks amazing on you. Mine._  
A few moments later, Louis has the jumper on and is climbing into his side of the blanket mound, finding the sleeping bag. Harry ignores the way the jumper completely covers Louis' bed shorts.  
"Settled?" Louis nods, burrowing further into the sleeping bag.  
Harry climbs into his own, struggling to get his jeans and tshirt off inside of it. He would've just stripped down before he got in but he didn't want to make Louis uncomfortable. A few groans and grunts later, he's down to his boxers and getting into his sleeping position, glancing over to Louis.

\---

Louis' pretty sure Harry has been staring at him for almost a minute now. That isn't long but it's making Louis self-conscious, so he decides to say something.  
"Thank you,"  
It's not really what he was going for, but hey, it gives him a reason to turn and look at Harry.  
"For?"  
Harry's still staring, one arm on top of all the blankets above them, running his thumb along his own fingers. Louis can’t stop staring, all the little things, the way Harry’s hair is splayed out above his head, curls poking out in all directions, the way in this light his eyes still look emerald green, the type of eyes you can’t help but trust.  
"Being so... Being so nice to me,"  
"You don't need to thank me, little one, truly," Harry's voice is calm, hushed, even, Louis can already feel his eyes drooping at the sound. He smiles a little, acknowledging the answer.  
"Are you warm enough now?"  
"Warmer, thanks,"  
Harry doesn’t say anything, just nods.  
Louis suddenly remembers building forts with his sisters, the way he’d sneak about the house and gather all the blankets, all the chairs and cushions. He remembers looking at Lottie and hoping she never gets treated the way he did. He’d never let his siblings get hurt, he feels bad for not being able to protect them now. Louis sighs without realising, wondering if Lottie did turn out to be an alpha, she started showing alpha traits not long before he went. The last memory of her he has is her crying and screaming. _Your fault._  
"What are you thinking about?" Louis startles at Harry’s voice. He hadn’t realised how far he’d retreated into his own head.  
"My sisters," He’s scared to say anything more.  
"Yeah? What are they like?"  
Louis’ brows furrow. He’s never spoken to anybody about his sisters before.  
"Beautiful, all of them,"  
"Is that so? Runs in the family then?" Louis smiles as he looks at Harry’s cheeky raised eyebrow.  
"For the girls, definitely,"  
"Mhmm, were you close?" Harry shuffles a little bit closer, getting comfortable, Louis thinks.  
"Yeah. Yeah, we were, me and Lott’s especially," He doesn’t even realise he’s opening up a little bit.  
"Lott’s?" Harry’s got this warm smile on his face, as though he _wants_ to hear what he’s saying.  
"Lottie. Well, Charlotte, but I only ever really called her Lott’s. She always wanted to bleach her hair, white blonde she wanted it. Had the nicest eyes of all of us, too, although I'd probably never say that in front of the rest of them, but Lottie knew I thought it,"  
"Do you have a lot of sisters?" Louis barely notices Harry's hand moving until it's gently stroking his hair, Louis shuts his eyes and thinks, trying not to focus on Harry's fingers playing with his hair. It's a weird feeling. Intimate.  
"Four. That I... Know of?"  
Harry is silent but his fingers don't stop playing with his hair, Louis takes it as a gesture to go on.  
"There's Lottie, she's the oldest girl, then Fizzy, or Felicite, then the twins; Daisy and Phoebe. I don't know if, um, my... biological dad ever had like, more kids. I don't know what my mum had either. Whether she had a boy or a girl. She was pregnant when... You know,"  
Louis tenses. Harry moves a little closer and scratches his scalp with the pads of his fingers. Louis doesn't know how it makes him feel. Cherished, maybe.  
"Wow, a lot of sisters. Didn't know your mother was pregnant. Did you ever want a brother?"  
"Yeah kind of. I mean, my sisters were enough, obviously, but a brother wouldn't hurt. I just didn't want them to be like-" There's a silence and it's awkward. But Louis has only just realised what he was going to say as he went to say it. He waits a moment, wondering whether he should say it. _Fuck it._ "-Like me," Harry hums for him to go on, all the while Louis is focusing on the reassuring hand in his hair, he continues, "for their own, like, good, safety and all that,"  
Louis knows how dismissive he sounds. He knows if he goes too far into this he'll panic. It's embarrassing anyway. That he couldn't take care of himself, that he let himself be abused all this time. Why would he open up that side to Harry? The _weak_ side.  
"Perfectly reasonable, kitten," Louis feels Harry's voice vibrate through him, it's so deep and home-y.  
"Yeah. Can you... Like... Never mind," Louis' heart is racing but he is literally craving affection. From an alpha. From Harry.  
Harry goes to move his hand away from Louis' hair  
"You want me to stop-"  
"-No!" Louis almost shouts, perhaps too quickly.  
Harry just raises a questioning brow and Louis is quick to look at the ground in embarrassment.  
"What do you want me to do?"  
_You don't deserve it, he'll hurt you._  
"Can I have like, a, um, hug...?"  
"Yes! Of course! You don't even have to as-"  
"No I mean like a, like, from, like, behind, like... cuddling?" Louis is cursing himself at how embarrassing he is. Why did he even ask that? Harry's going to think he's a frea-  
"You want to be little spoon?"  
Louis gives a curt nod, still not meeting Harry's eyes.  
"That's adorable, little one. I'll gladly be your big spoon, how do you wanna do it?"  
"What?" They're both sat up a little bit now.  
"Well I can do it basically like this if you want, through the sleeping bags, or you can come get in here, if you wanted, cause it's a two person sleeping bag?"  
"Um, yeah. That one. If that's okay,"  
"No complaints my end, love. Erm, one thing, I'm only in my boxers so do you want me to put my jeans on? It's up to you,"  
"That's... Um. You don't have to put them on,"  
He's pretty sure if he were up to a heart monitor right now they'd think that something was wrong with how fast his heart is hammering.  
"Right then, come here, little spoon!”  
Louis crawls out of his sleeping bag, watching as Harry moves the blankets and unzips the sleeping bag, shuffling back so that there's room for him. Harry's holding the top open and pats the space in front of him for Louis to lie there.  
_don't look at his chest don't look at his chest fuck_  
He climbs in and lays facing away from Harry, ignoring his smile and body and simply settling down as Harry zips up the sleeping bag again and pulls the blanket over them.  
"Okay?" Harry says as he's beginning to lie down behind him.  
"Yep," Louis manages to squeak out. It feels so familiar to him. It shouldn't, but it does. It feels safe even when he's telling himself that it _isn't_ safe. Harry wraps his arm around Louis' middle and Louis can't help but grab Harry's hand in between both of his. An anchor. He wonders what it would be like if there was an anchor and a rope binding them both there, together. He smiles at the thoughts perhaps a little goofily if he's being honest. He can feel Harry's bare legs pressed against his and skin contact is a little odd for him, but hey- he's not exactly complaining.  
He realises how much he's been craving exactly this, since he met Harry. It's probably weird, seeing as he only moved to Skylar about a week ago. But, he can't help it. Most people bond almost immediately, once they meet someone compatible. He's not sure if Harry would ever even consider him as a possible mate but he's happy where he is. Here in Harry's arms, safely cocooned, sharing a bed, well, sleeping bag, with cute fairy lights still glowing. He can hear Harry's breathing, feel it even, as his chest rises and falls, pressure on his back, gone, and back again, gone and back again. This, _this_ is what he wants. Even if he doesn't feel he deserves it. An overwhelming feeling of content washes over him, the tension leaving his body as he relaxes.  
"'S this what you wanted?" Louis nods.  
"Thank you,"  
They're closer now, don't need to talk as loud, the world between them got smaller.  
Louis is too tired to say anything else, just burrows his head further into the pillow and shuts his eyes as he feels Harry press a kiss to the back of his head.  
"Sleep well, Lou,"

\---

Harry doesn't sleep for a long time. The weight of Louis in his arms is enough distraction, but he can't stop thinking up ideas as to why Louis is here. Why is he so scared if opening up? Of alphas? Of everybody? What happened when he wasn't here? Who made _his_ omega feel the way he does.  
_Wow,_ he thinks. _Maybe I should tone down the possessiveness_.  
He can't ask his dad because he's bound by law not to tell explicit details during ongoing investigations. His only option is to get Louis to open up to him.  
He’s wondering why Louis wanted him to cuddle him, also, he wasn’t expecting to be able to do this for a very, very long time – if ever. It makes it stranger to him that it was Louis that _asked_ for it. He’d always imagined that he would be the one that would initiate it. Thinking back to how the tension visibly left Louis’ body has him worried. Is he that worried all the time? 

 

-

 

\--

 

-

 

Harry is startled awake movement, by a writhing figure beside him. _Louis._  
He leans back a little, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the fairy lights that are still on, he isn’t sure when he fell sleep but he doesn’t feel like he’s slept at all, his eyes are burning and all his muscles ache. A whining noise emits from Louis’ throat, he can tell it’s genuine fear and discomfort immediately, and then the writhing clicks into place. Louis is having a nightmare.  
He tries to shake Louis gently, to wake him up enough to stop the dream but to no avail. Louis’ breathing worsens and he starts thrashing.  
Desperation kicks in as Harry starts repeating Louis’ name, over and over, starting gentle.  
"Louis, come on, wake up," Wiping the bead of sweat from Louis’ temple as slight as he can.  
"Lou, Lou! You’re dreaming, "  
Nothing.  
Nothing but more thrashing and whining. 

Distress courses through his body and he _has_ to.  
"LOU! Wake up!" His alpha voice isn’t something he likes to use, only ever by accident or when the times desperately call for it. Like now.  
Louis screams a little as he scrambles to sit up, chest heaving and tears starting to well in his eyes.  
"I’m sorry, sorry- I didn’t mea-" Louis rushes to get out.  
"Hey, hey! Calm down, it’s okay, it’s okay," Harry shushes him, speaking over his apologies in hushed tones, mustering up as much calm energy as he physically can.  
Louis eventually quietens and a fleeting silence flits between them, before Louis literally bursts into tears.  
Harry is swift in his movement to pull Louis into his chest, rubbing his hand in his hair and on his back, letting him cry on his bare chest. It probably looks stupid, they’re both in uncomfortable positions, still in the same sleeping bag, half upright, arms awkwardly wrapped around each other. Harry breaths out a laugh as he realises how cocooned he has Louis into his chest. He wait until Louis has calmed a little, only sniffling and a few tears dropping, before he attempts to push him back a little bit, but to be met with Louis’ arms tightening around his middle. Smiling, he tightens his own arms back up, continuing to rub soothing motions through his jumper.  
It’s probably around ten minutes later, when Harry speaks. Louis is still sniffling, but his tears have slowed right down, Harry’s chest doesn’t feel as wet as it did before.  
"I had this nightmare once; I was probably about eleven at the time. And I remember I’d been reading about worst ways to die in a newspaper article, I don’t know why I was reading a newspaper at eleven- but anyway," He lays them both down properly, Louis’ face still against his chest, and arms still tight around each other, "This article had most of the things people fear, the obvious, cancer, drowning, being tortured, the lot. And, I remember reading them all, and when I got to number one, it stuck in my head, you know what it was?"  
Louis shakes his head no, effectively smushing his face further into Harry’s chest.  
"Being buried alive," He shudders at the thought, "And this article, like, it goes into so much detail, the way you’re making it worse for yourself if you scream because you’re wasting oxygen, which you’ll run out of eventually anyway, the darkness, loneliness, the whole shebang. And I couldn’t stop thinking about it, days and days I’d spend thinking up different ways I could get buried alive. Probably thought of everything, from being trapped under rubble to caught in a cave, little imaginative eleven year old me. But yeah, this one night, I dreamt that I was in this coma, but at first it was out of body. I was in the hospital room, watching everyone I loved huddle around me, they were saying goodbye to my body on this bed, I mean that in itself was horrifying, but it got worse, you wanna know how?"  
A muffled ‘ _yeah_ ’ comes from Louis, who’s stopped crying now, but sniffling inconsistently.  
"Alright, kitten. Anyways, I watch from this out of body experience as they turn off this life support machine, and literally watch and listen as the beeps stop on the machine, as my friends at the time and my parents are crying, my mum’s stroking my face as she says goodbye to me, and the worst was probably my sister. We didn’t get along all the time then, cause, well we were kids, you know? But she was sobbing, like, proper blubbering and she was alone. Nobody was comforting her, the way my friends were with each other and my mum and dad were with each other kind of thing. And everything in me wanted to hug her in that moment, but I couldn’t, I couldn’t move from where I was. And it’s weird cause I’m watching, like, I’m still _there_ right? I had to stay there watching as everyone left, one by one, saying goodbye to this body – me! And then it was literally just me watching my lifeless body. Weirdest thing ever, but hey, not too long after that, everything went black, which was relieving at first but then I could move, and I shit you not, Louis, it felt so real. I’m in this padded bed thing, I think at first, and it’s completely dark, I’m talking like, you can’t see anything, pitch black. My hands start feeling around where they are, and it’s like, this padding comes right up to my body, so I move my hands up to my face, and just check it’s me, and sure enough, it is,"  
He takes a deep breath.  
"You okay?" He tightens his arms again around Louis.  
"Yes. Are you?"  
Harry nods, "You want me to carry on?" Double checking.  
"If you’re okay with that?"  
"Right, so as I go to put my hand out I hit more padding, but it’s less padded here, so I hit it, wondering what it is, and beneath it I can hear wood. So at this point I’m realising, oh my god, you know? This is a coffin. I’ve been buried. _Buried alive_. I’m bricking it at this point, I can’t move more than about 4 inch in any direction, and I start panicking, proper screaming kicking and hitting the lid of this coffin but nobody’s coming, and I start crying as I’m pure kicking up a fit in this coffin, screaming louder than I thought was even possible, but nobody comes, nobody can hear me, and it’s getting baking in this box, I’m struggling to breathe and I can’t stop screaming, panicking, the only thought I’m having it like, _They’ve buried me alive, I’m going to die, I’m going to die,_ "  
Harry takes a moment to calm his breathing.  
"But yeah, thing is, it was so vivid, and I don’t know how or why, but I wake up, and it’s not until I realise I can move my arms further than four inches that I stop screaming, and Gemma’s in the room, and my mum, and I can see some of the other kids from the house standing at the door, they’d tried to wake me up but couldn’t, and I’m coughing and wheezing, trying to catch my breath, and as soon as I can think straight I run straight to Gemma and jump into her arms, she was taller than me at the time. And she must’ve known at the time how much the dream had fucked me up cause she carried me to her room and let me sleep in her bed the rest of that night, didn’t make me tell her what had happened or anything. I had to go to the doctors later that week because I’d screamed so much that I could barely speak, even woke up the whole house doing it. Turns out everything I was trying to do in the dream, like the screaming and the moving, in real life, I’ve never told anybody what happened in that dream. Well, nightmare, really, it still terrifies me to this day,"  
"That sounds so… Scary. I don’t know what to say," Louis sounds speechless.  
"You don’t need to say anything, it’s not my biggest fear anymore, I guess, just isn’t a very pleasant thought," _I just wanted to take your mind off of yours._ goes unspoken.  
"What is?"  
"Hmm?"  
"What is your biggest fear? If that’s okay to ask?" Louis’ speaking so quietly.  
"I guess, just losing who I love. Like, my family, mainly, which means like, everyone in this house too, but also I’m scared of losing a bondmate, once I _have_ one, that is,"  
_You, if you’d let me bond you._  
"I’m not sure what mine is,"  
"Maybe you’ll realise at some point, you gonna tell me what it is when you figure it out?" Harry asks a little cheekily.  
"Maybe," Louis looks up at Harry from his chest. There’s a little teasing smirk on his face.  
His eyes always look so blue, especially after he’s cried, there are little crystals of tears making his eyelashes stick together as they dry, and tear tracks down his face, but all Harry can think is _Wow, I want to spend the rest of my life with you._  
He smiles at the thought, probably a little creepy, but he honestly doesn’t want to spend a single day without him.  
"You ready to go back sleep?" Harry asks after Louis yawns.  
"Yeah, can I like-"  
"Do whatever you want sweets, I’m not bothered,"  
Louis looks considering then, before getting up slightly, and climbing on top of Harry fully, both legs thrown over one side, and lowering himself so his head is now back on Harrys chest now. It shouldn’t work, but it does because of the size difference, and how much Louis curls up on top of him.  
"Comfy, love?"  
Louis nods, "Thank you,"  
Harry just leans up and presses a kiss to the top of his head, wraps his arms back around Louis, who retaliates by basically hugging Harry’s bicep. About twenty seconds pass, and Louis places a gentle, barely-there kiss to Harry’s chest.  
Harry’s bites his lip as he tries to suppress a smile.


	10. always a riddle inside my head

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the end may shock u :O  
> did i just clickbait you? who knows,  
> anyhoooo, i hope you enjoy this long awaited chapter  
> love u

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> p.s this is mainly Harry's point of view for this chapter cause it's gonna be mainly/all Louis next chapter i think

Louis realises as soon as he wakes that he's still on top of Harry, one leg on top of Harry's and the other splayed off to the side, one arm free from the sleeping bag and the other bent above his head on Harry's chest. The way Harry's chest is rising and falling rhythmically indicates he's still asleep and Louis doesn't want to wake him. As embarrassed as he feels about asking Harry to cuddle him, especially having to ask on two separate occasions, Louis can't find it in himself to regret it. Despite the nightmare - probably brought on by talking about his sisters, more of a memory than a nightmare, he thinks that sleeping with Harry was his comfiest and most content night sleep ever - even if it was in a sleeping bag and some blankets.

 _Last night was weird._  
He stretches a little to reach his phone on what was supposed to be his pillow, smiling to himself when even subconsciously, Harry tightens his one-arm hold of him. Louis starts by clicking on Instagram after seeing he's got a bunch of notifications. The first thing that he sees is that he's gained a few followers and they all seem to be from Skylar. When he gets near the bottom he sees that Niall and Harry have both tagged him in photo's. The one Niall has tagged him in is a photo of outside when everyone has gone bed, he's assuming. He can't help but roll his eyes because he's tagged with Harry on the blanket they were sitting on. Then he checks the photo that Harry tagged him in and it's... Well, it makes him smile, brings about a feeling he can't quite explain. It's a photo of their legs tangled up yesterday when they were laying down on the blanket: when Louis' leg was thrown over the top of Harry's and his chest pressed into Harry's side. There's such a size difference between them, Louis is tiny compared to him. It's exceedingly obvious with how he's laying on top of Harry right now, as well as in the picture. Come to think of it, it's obvious in every situation so far that Louis has been in with the other boy.  
He double taps the picture and checks the caption.  
' **Comfort.** '  
And, well, that's cute. He googles how to screenshot on iPhones and promptly does so, then notices the comments.  
' **niallhoran** _cute as fuck mate Love you both_ '  
' **louteasdale** _ooooh Gemma told me about new boy, when can I cut his hair?_ '  
There's a little haircut emoji at the end and Louis smiles.

He recognises her as one of the people who followed him so he clicks on her page and follows her back.  
_Do I need a haircut?_

He messes about on his phone for a little while longer, looking up hairstyles (he's found a really choppy one he wants) and Polaroid photography tips before Harry stretches his legs out and groans slightly. Louis locks his phone and looks up at him. A few seconds pass and Harry moves the arm that was draped over his eyes and tries adjusts to the light in the room. Squinting and blinking, for a few moments, then just staring. It's probably after minute that Harry actually starts acting awake instead of just staring at the ceiling.  
"Mornin'. Did you sleep well?" Harry's eyes flick down at Louis for a second, then stretches both his arms above his head.  
_Sleepy voice Harry's chest rumbles._  
Louis nods, essentially just digging his chin further into Harry's chest.  
"After the, um, nightmare yes. Thank you for being there, do you want me to get off you now?"  
"I'd be there every night if I could. And nah, no worries, kinda like you there, if I'm honest,"  
"Why?" _Why would anybody like somebody like me laying on them and invading their personal space?_  
"I usually sleep on my back and fold my arms over my chest, so it's nice to have something to wrap them around instead of looking like a sarcophagus," Harry manages to keep a straight face for all of five seconds before he breaks into a giggle.  
"Nah, as true as that is, it's not the _actual_ reason. I guess I'm just a cuddly person, always have been. Plus you're great to cuddle, you're so small and like, so omega. It's just-" Harry cuts himself off with a groan and before Louis can dwell on the thought that _oh my god he just acknowledged my omega status out loud to me for the first time and it wasn't a bad thing_ , Harry's continuing, "Sorry, I've only just woke up. No brain to mouth filter yet. Ignore me, were you comfortable?"  
Louis finds himself smiling at the fact Harry said that without thinking.  
"Yes, thank you. Much more comfortable than I've ever been I think,"  
"Cute, I think though, that I need to pee, and probably have a wash and clean my teeth. You coming up with me?"  
"Yeah, okay," Louis replies but neither of them make any move to get up for a good few more minutes, and even then, when Louis tries to get up, Harry pulls him back to his chest, squeezing tightly for a few seconds and leans up to kiss his head again. Louis swears he feels a heat course through his body, pulsing from where Harry's lips had met his skin, stalling in his stomach, sending the butterflies into a frenzy. The butterflies that are always bashing their wings against his insides while Harry is around. It's a strange feeling, Louis thinks; like every time their bodies touch, the butterflies charge up, and each time they smash into parts of Louis' insides, they're sending little jolts and sparks of energy through him.  
"Come on then, kitten, let's get cleaned and washed up, I don't think anyone else is awake yet,"  
They both get up, Louis not even noticing when Harry puts his jeans on from the night before, as he's too busy stretching, arms held up to the sky and squeaking out a little dinosaur noise as he does it. Doesn't even notice as the taller of the two comes up behind him and wraps his arms round his middle, growling playfully and walking them forward together towards the zipped door of their room in the tent.  
They exit the tent quietly, so not to wake any of the others and Louis waits as Harry pulls the back door key out of his back pocket and unlocks the it, using Louis inside before shutting the door back up.

The house is quiet, most of the occupants relishing in a lie in out in the tent, the rest not needing to wake up for breakfast and not needing to get out of bed meant everyone was staying as they were. Louis feels a comfort at the house being silent, almost like he can run around and be himself. He wouldn't, obviously, but the idea makes him smile. _Would Harry run around with me? Catch me?_  
"It's nice like this," A simple statement, but Harry understands what he means.  
"Yeah. It's not often it is like this, usually there's at least one person in every room, hard to get some peace in a place like this, it's why I chose my room, but I love this place all the same,"  
Louis just smiles and refocuses back on the stairs, Harry's just behind him, one step but to the left a little, right hand resting on its usual resting spot by now, in the dip of Louis' back, above his arse.  
Soon after they've brushed their teeth together in a horribly domestic manner, laughing at each other in the mirror as the white froth dribbled down both of their chins, and Harry leaves the shared bathroom into his own room to let Louis pee and Louis does the same but into his room instead of Harry's.  
"So I was thinking," Harrys says after knocking and walking into Louis' room with permission, "Considering nobody is making breakfast, do you want to go out for a brunch type thing? Or would you prefer cereal or something?"  
"I don't, like, I don't know if I have any money..." Louis trails off, feeling awkward mentioning money, "But cereal would be fi-"  
"Nonsense. I'll pay. My treat,"  
"You do that an awful lot thought, it makes me feel bad," Louis can't meet Harry's eyes, he's glancing everywhere but his eyes actually.  
"Listen, sweets, I _want_ to, if I didn't want to, I wouldn't offer okay? I don't mean to sound like a knob but this'll probably make you feel better: s'my dad that runs this place, yeah? Well, founded and owns it. That means because me, mum and Gems actually run the place, organise everything, look after everyone when they need it and all that, we get more money. Louis, I'm not very materialistic, I don't _want_ much but when I do want something I can buy it. Believe me, brunch for both of us won't even be a blip in my account. God, sorry, sound like a right dickhead,"  
Louis' trying not to giggle, he isn't sure the last sentence about it not even being a blip is completely true but hey, Harry seems pretty adamant he doesn't mind.  
"Okay. I'll come," He still can't meet Harry's eyes but he can tell he's got a grin on his face when he says ' _great, come on then sweets_ '.

\---

They're walking through the streets after finding somewhere decent to park. Harry decides Wetherspoons is the best bet, he loves a good full English breakfast there, it's where he comes with Cara a lot, when she's not with Lydia. Hopefully he can bring Louis with him more often. He'd let his mum know they were going out for brunch, and ignored her eyebrow raise in favour of asking if she needed anything. ' _No, just be careful. Please._ '. He knew she wasn't talking about the trip out.

"So, I'm getting a full English, do you want to try the vegetarian full English? Louis raises both his eyebrows, perhaps in surprise.  
"You don't have to, obviously, just thought it would be nice before you properly go vegetarian - if you still want to that is - to try some of the options. If you don't like it we can swap plates and you can have mine, I've had it before, so I know I like it,"  
"It's good then?" Louis still looks a little unsure.  
"Brilliant, as good as a meat one, you want one? Promise you don't have to pretend you like it," Harry guides Louis in front of him towards the bar after he nods, Harry pays, asking Louis directly what the bartender asks him, ' _how many hash browns?_ ' ' _beans or tomatoes?_ ' and he loves how responsive he is to him and him only. _Mine._

They sit in a back corner, so they're out the way and Harry sits with his back to everyone so Louis can feel safe by seeing where everybody else is. A small detail Harry's noticed from the times he's been in public with Louis is that whenever he looks up from his feet, if he's not looking at Harry his eyes dart from person to person, checking them, making sure. Louis probably doesn't even realise Harry sat there on purpose.  
Harry watches as Louis sips on his coke through a straw idly, glancing around at the people in the pub, there isn't many, it's not too busy but it's enough. There's noise and there's people.  
"Do you like working at Skylar? If-If that's like, okay to ask?" Louis surprises Harry by talking first. He's pushed his drink a little away from him, obviously checked everyone in the pub for potential danger, Harry does it as soon as he walks in. Is always checking.  
"Erm, do you want the long answer or the short one?"  
"You can choose, if you want,"  
"Well, in short, I love it. Sure there are ups and downs but there are with any job, I wouldn't even consider this a job, really. It's more like, I get to help people who I truly grow to love and care for, which is great. I love seeing people like, grow and fit their own personalities. So often people have arrived and they've been nothing but a broken ship, abandoned and wrecked from years of wear and tear, and that's putting It nicely, you know?"  
Louis nods.  
"It's nice because you can help them build that back up, mend the broken parts and hand them pieces and watch and help as they do it. And when they're all done, it's amazing to watch them go, to set sail, knowing you had a part of it all and that you and this person don't just have a work relationship with you but that they're like family to you. And you are to them. I dunno, it's just one of them things,"  
Harry refocuses on Louis who's got a smile on his face, staring at Harry as he spoke. Harry makes sure to burn the image into his brain because heck, what a beautiful sight.

Brunch goes smoothly, Louis informs Harry that he loves the vegetarian sausages, perhaps more than the normal sausages, that hash browns are one of his favourite things and that he loved the analogy of Harry's when he compared people to ships. Harry realises he's never really thought properly about it but once he does he realises how wonderful it sounds.  
Harry can't believe how protective he feels of Louis already. They're not even _together_ and Harry can't imagine going back to how it was before Louis arrived. They've spent so much time together that it almost feels as though they're meant to be near each other all the time - as though Harry was meant to look after Louis. When the thought crosses his mind, he realises it's not even a burden. TV shows that he grew up on made out that having an omega hanging off your arm all the time was a bad thing, a setback, something that will hold you down and alphas aren't meant to be held down. _Apparently._  
His mind wanders when they're walking back to his car, full and satisfied.  
How could anybody ever see this as a burden? And yet, he supposes Louis should be more so, given his past and experience. But Harry... Harry loves it. He's never minded taking care of people and making sure they're okay, he grew up doing it. But with Louis, it feels like it's not even a job. Its second nature and he _loves_ it. Like Louis' feelings and comfort are the only things that matter, that Louis is the only thing that matters. Harry's not stupid though. He knows what this means. And this bullshit about alphas not meant for being held down, Harry almost scoffs aloud.

My Louis. My little anchor.

\--

Gemma is awake when they get home, only slightly raising an eyebrow when she notices that it’s just Louis and Harry and none of the others. Harry tells Louis to go up to his room or outside and that he’ll bring him a bottle of water, watching as he walks up the stairs before turning round and making his way to the fridge. Gemma follows him with her eyes from where she’s sat on the counter, not saying anything as he grabs two bottles of water.

“Want one?” He asks, ignoring her stare on purpose, focusing on the food piled high in the fridge and wondering what to make for dinner.

“Nope, got tea, thanks,” He glances at her just long enough to see her raise her cup then immediately looks back into the fridge, pointlessly rummaging through a few items, ham, fresh pasta…

“Right. I’m gonna…”

He shuts the fridge door, hoping to get out of the room before she speaks, expect life isn’t on his side and he winces as she says ‘ _just a minute_ ’.

He’s grimacing slightly as he turns round, not quite managing to supress it enough into a normal face before he’s facing her, two water bottles in hand.

“Listen, Haz, I know you’re always careful but we already spoke about what you and Louis could be, well, probably are. You realise what that means, right? Harry we’re a safe house and I can tell Louis feels safest with you, but what if one day you don’t have as much self control as you do now? Hm? Just… Just think about Louis, okay? I don’t want you doing something that could not only be destructive to the way we’ve done things around here but also to Louis,”

“I wouldn’t hurt hi-,”

“Shut up Harry, I know you wouldn’t. I’m saying _don’t_ rush things. Don’t get too deep then not be able to get out if needs be, okay?”

Harry just nods.

“Good. Sorry for being an ass but I need to make sure everything is under control,”

“It’s okay. I’m, er,” He flicks his eyes towards the door.

Gemma nods, lips pursed.

 

Harry basically sprints up the stairs, happy to get out of an awkward situation, he knows she’s right but Harry has never been anything but careful. But then, he guesses her point is that it may not be possible with Louis.

“Is it alright to come in?” Harry asks when he reaches Louis’ door, it was left ajar but he doesn’t particularly want to intrude upon him.

 

“Yes, I left it open for you,”

 

Harry pushes open the door with his shoulder, grinning at Louis as he enters then shutting it with his hip.

“I know, I was just making sure,”

Louis smiles, he’s on his bed, sitting cross legged by his pillows, though Harry can tell he’s moved some to the end of the bed for Harry to sit against.

“You took a while, if that’s not, like, rude to say,”

“Nah, not rude and I know, I er,” He stops himself before saying Gemma spoke to him, just in case Louis asked what about. That’s not particularly something he wants to have a conversation with Louis about right now, “I was just double checking what was in the fridge, I think it’s my turn to make dinner tonight I think,”

“Oh. Find anything interesting?” Louis takes the water bottles out of his hand as Harry gets himself comfortable at the end of the bed, stretching his legs out and being just short of touching Louis’ knees with his toes.  
“Not really, what do you fancy?”  
“I don’t think I can even think about food right now, I think I gained like 8 stone from that breakfast,” Louis has sort of a grimace on his face when he says it, as though he’s not completely comfortable talking about his weight.  
Harry laughed, the sound loud in the otherwise quiet room.  
"I guess we'll just have to see what I make later then, eh? You mind if I put some music on?"  
"Um, sure," Louis says. Pulling out his own phone and checking it when Harry fiddles with his to find a decent playlist.  
"Niall asked where we are. He and Zayn are both awake,"  
Harry clicks the playlist ' _chill jams_ ' and presses shuffle, throwing his phone onto the bed to play freely between them.  
"If you tell them that we're in here they'll come up and in. If you're not comfortable with that, tell them we're still out for breakfast,"  
"I-I like it when it's like, me and you-but I don't want to, I don't want to lie to him..."  
Harry smiles at what Louis just said, smile spreading as he watches Louis realise he said it, face flushing red and looking down at his phone so fast Harry is surprised he didn't break his neck.  
"You like spending time with just me, kitten?" He can feel his alpha surge with pride inside of him, feeling too big for his chest, pushing at the skin to get out. He's smirking at the smaller boy, who's not even able to meet his eyes, but god; he looks pretty with his fringe cascading over his face, eyelashes visible through the thin strands and a pink sheen dusting the visible parts of his cheeks.  
"I-I told them we're in here," He's still not looking up for his phone though, avoiding Harry's face as well as the question.  
"Hey, Lou?" A soft voice is what Harry goes for; it sort of matches the feel of the room. Everything about Louis is soft. His clothes, his room, his curves, his face. _Everything._  
A little hum sounds from the boy, chest slightly rising as he forces the sound out.  
"I like spending time with you too, little one. You can be honest with me," The words are quiet, the sound of the song playing almost drowning them out.  
Harry watches for a few seconds as Louis locks his phone, as his cheeks move in what is undoubtedly a small smile and as he raises his head slowly to meet Harry's eyes. It's always as breathtaking sight to him, he doesn't think he could ever get bored of looking at Louis.  
"I like... I like spending time with you, Harry," His face is still slightly red, but he's smiling, mouth closed and lips soft. Harry's been noticing that Louis doesn't stutter as much when he's around him lately, he knows it's a nervous thing, has helped many other people overcome it in his lifetime due to his job, but with Louis it feels almost monumental. He can't wait for the day that Louis feels comfortable enough to tell him anything without having to hesitate or stutter and be nervous about it, it's just one of the many things that Harry wants to help Louis with. He thinks though, that if that day never comes, he'd still love Louis just as much as he is now, he just wants to help Louis be as happy and as comfortable as he can possibly be. As him, with Harry.

The moment between the two is cut short, though, as always. There's a small knock on Louis' bedroom door, muffled voices behind it. Louis glances round the room once, probably making sure that everything is in place and that he is safe before his eyes land on Harry.  
"Do you want me to let them in?" Harry's moving to stand up before Louis' even answered, ready to tell them to go away or let them in depending on his answer, which comes in the form of a nod.  
"Sure?"  
"Yep,"

A few moments later and Niall and Zayn have piled into the room, it suddenly feels slightly crowded to Harry, he's not been in here with anybody but Louis yet. It's not terrible, though, Louis stayed in his place at the pillows of the bed, Zayn pulling the chair out from underneath Louis' desk and bringing it closer, feet up on the bed. Harry had taken his place at the end of the bed at first, but moved up to next to Louis at the pillows when he noticed slight discomfort from Louis when Niall went to sit near him.  
"Never seen this room look so good," Zayn comments, "Used to want this room myself but _someone_ didn't want to share his bathroom,"  
Harry _almost_ blushes at the pointed comment but then remembered the reason he didn't want to share with Zayn. One of the reasons anyway.  
"With _you_ , Zee. I didn't want to share with you. If you don't remember, it was when you'd first had to start shaving-"  
"-don't you dare!"  
"-and not only did you leave your little shavings all over the main bathroom, but you also left the little bits of tissue with blood on you stuck where you'd nicked the skin. It was a mess mate. Not having that in my bathroom,"  
Niall cuts in then, his jarring laugh stopping abruptly, "'e still leaves his fuckin' bristles everywhere, it's even worse now he's so meticulous about it, fuckin' bathroom hog!"  
Zayn's laughing along, Harry knows Niall isn't really annoyed, but it's funny nonetheless. All the boys except Louis and Harry have to share the same bathroom, directly in front of the stairs between Harry's room and Niall's. Next to Niall's room is Liam's, then Zayn's above/behind the stairs. Between Zayn's and Louis' rooms is a storage closet, mainly used to store bits they don't need in their bedrooms and it's also got the entrance into a small attic, which is also used for storage. Technically Louis and Harry's rooms are completely separated from the rest of the boys, Harry likes it that way. It's much more private.  
"I'm glad I didn't move in that room now though, quite like my room now your mum got the wallpaper for me to paint on,"  
"True, mate, you should do some spray paintin' in my room one day," Niall has always admired Zayn's art, which, in all honesty is incredible. It took so much to convince his mum to get Zayn some white wallpaper they can rip down if they ever have to leave so he could spray paint over that. Harry never told Zayn it was him that convinced her to get the wallpaper. Granted, it was because he didn't want to share his bathroom but hey, he's happy, Zayn's happy. What else is there to it?  
"I'm also so glad, wouldn't have met Louis here the same way if you had," Harry wraps one of his arms around Louis and pulls him closer momentarily, loosening his hold but keeping his arm round the smaller boy.  
Louis, who had been quiet but smiling the whole time, looked directly into Harry's eyes as Zayn pressed, "How did you meet?"  
And Harry doesn't want to look away from Louis' gaze, so instead of answering Zayn, he tells Louis,  
"I met you in the toilet,"  
Louis' closed mouth smile quirked up into a small grin, lips stretching over slightly visible white teeth, he blinked, looking away at the other two as he opened his eyes.  
"Oh?" Zayn clearly wanted more information but it seemed neither of them wanted to elaborate. Louis nodded, while Harry just said _yeah_.  
Niall, noticing that neither of them were going to say any more, changed the subject slightly, commenting on the polaroid’s Louis has up on the wall behind his bed. Harry's tired, didn't get much sleep after Louis had the nightmare, too busy thinking about him, what the future could hold and how much things have changed in just the past few days. A few days prior, Harry wouldn't have been able to imagine spending as much time with someone as he and Louis currently do; yet now he can't imagine being away from Louis for more than a few days. It's so odd to think about.

He doesn't really pay attention to the conversation from there on but someone Louis ends up leaning against him while he's in a half sitting position against the headboard of Louis' bed. He's almost certain he was the one that pulled Louis into that position but Louis without a doubt came willingly because Harry wouldn't have forced it. Neither Niall nor Zayn have mentioned anything. It's surprising how natural it is for them to be that close. He wonders of they’ve even realised that they are sitting that close or if it’s so natural that it doesn’t even register as unusual. 

Niall and Zayn end up leaving after about an hour, Louis had stopped joining in so much and Harry wasn't participating much in the first place so essentially it was just Niall and Zayn chatting with each other. Niall had received a text from Liam saying that Sophia had gone home and he was up for playing some football. 

"How are you settling in then? Like as though you were telling me as a professional - though I do wish to know on a personal level too, I just still need to do my job," Harry decides to ask now, while it's just the two of them on the upper floor and in the room alone, the privacy may help Louis be truthful.  
"Erm, I think, well, good. It's still really scary because like, there's a lot of people but, you're making it easier... Can I say that?" Louis is fiddling with the sides of the case of his phone, glancing up at Harry every couple of words, probably to gauge his reaction.  
"Yep, of course. You can say whatever but I'll have to tell Des and Anne, as well as write out a little form of what you say between now and when I've finished. You are still okay answering, yeah?"  
Louis nods. Harry sometimes hates having to act professional, he'd much rather do it casually but it has to be done, and he feels he'd get the more honest answers out of Louis than Gemma, his mum or his dad would. He's got his notes folder open on his phone and clicks on Louis, quickly typing what he said.  
"Sorry, gotta make sure I get it all," he mumbles, not looking up until he's finished. Louis has a nervous smile on his face as he watches.  
"Okay, are the meals okay?"  
"Yep,"  
"Has anybody else bothered you?"  
"Not like... Much. It's things that shouldn't bother me. I think,"  
"Oh?"  
"Mmhmm,"  
Harry makes a mental note to maybe ask about that later.  
"Do you have everything you need?"  
Louis nods.  
"How is your room?"  
"I can't, I can't complain. I love it. It's so amazing compared t-to, yeah," He trails off, his eyes going distant.  
Harry nods, a reassuring smile crossing his features before he notes it down.  
"Do you think we could make any improvements?"  
Louis shakes his head. He looks slightly nervous. Maybe from all the questions. His eyes are still distant, though, as though he's lost in thought.  
"Alright. This was just a quick one until Anne gives you your first psychiatric appointment next week, is that alright?"

Louis doesn't move. Doesn't even blink, eyes glazed over. He doesn't even acknowledge Harry when he moves slightly closer.  
"Louis?" 

_Nothing._

"Lou?" Harry reaches out towards Louis as the younger boys eyes snap back into focus, fleeting glance at the hand before he screams and scrambles up off the bed and away from Harry. Momentarily shocked, Harry doesn't react, and seconds later Louis is gone, the lock to the bathroom sounding as he disappears from sight. 

" _Fuck_ " He whisper shouts, heart and mind racing. He hears Louis sniffle faintly through the door, heightened senses from the panic, and then the shower turning on. 

He's almost panicking. Usually in a situation like this he'd go and get his Mum because she's the psychiatrist. Although he's trained, he still feels more comfortable if the professional cuts in. He daren't do that now, he knows his mum will try and keep him away from Louis for at least a week, which he doesn't think would be good for neither Louis nor himself. 

He stands up, looking around the room as if it would throw a solution at him. It doesn't, but worth a try, right?  
He wonders if Louis thought to lock the other door. The way his heart is racing isn't pleasant and he wishes he could tell his alpha to calm down but it _won't_. The longer Louis is away from sight in the state he is in, the more Harry's alpha will be screaming at him to make sure the younger boy is safe. 

He takes his time walking round to the other door, not wanting to make any noise or panic Louis further by rushing. In a few seconds he's outside, can still hear the shower running and Louis' little sniffles. Louis is definitely crying, but he doesn't dare just walk in in case Louis is actually in the shower, though it doesn't sound like he is.  
"Lou? Lou, babe. I'm gonna try and come in, can you say if you're not decent?"  
He chooses to word it like this so Louis doesn't have to actually answer unless necessary. He know Louis won't want to talk right now. 

_Silence._

"Okay, say if it's not okay to come in," again with the wording. He knows Louis will more than likely let him as long as he's not naked. After silence from Louis again, he opens the door as slowly as he can, still making sure to make enough noise to let Louis know whereabouts he is. 

His heart _breaks_ when he sees Louis. He's got his back to him, sat underneath the shower, with his knees to his chest and head on his knees. His arms are wrapped around his own legs and he's obviously crying from the way his body is shaking. His clothes are soaked from the shower and Harry cringes. That can't be comfortable. 

He thinks for a moment, of what his next move should be, and by the time he's decided, he's already second guessing the choice. He won't change the decision though.  
He reaches behind and locks the door. He then looks into Louis' part of their shared cupboard and grabs the Lush bag with one of the bubble bars he bought for him on his first days at Skylar, as well as some of Louis' shampoo, conditioner and showergel.  
He puts one hand on Louis' upper back, comforting and letting him know he's still there. He doesn't want to speak yet. After plugging the bathtub and turning on the hot and cold to a warm temperature, absolutely making sure it won't be too hot for Louis. He crumbles the bubble bar into to rising water, watching as the bubbles begin growing in size. His hand is still on Louis, who's still not looked up but has stopped crying as hard as he was.  
"Hey, little one. I'm going to turn the shower off okay?" He's speaking in a calm tone, thumb rubbing through the wet fabric of Louis' shirt.  
After a slight nod (from what he can make out) of Louis' head, he stands and presses the off button. The rushing stream of water slows to a stop and he hears Louis let out a deep sigh. He's stopped crying now but still hasn't lifted his head.  
"Okay, sweets. I'm gonna get in behind you, but I'm not big on wet clothes so I'm gonna, I'll take everything but my boxers off. Like I'll leave them on, yeah?" A small hum of approval from Louis and Harry begins stripping down to his underwear. He knows how forward this is, and how potentially dangerous it is for his job, he knows if Louis told his mum about this he'd be in _huge_ trouble. But at the same time, Harry knows Louis better than anybody here and Louis isn't objecting, he knows it's exactly what Louis' omega wants right now.  
After stripping and placing his folded clothes on the counter, he turns back towards the bath and switches the taps off. He can't handle how Louis looks right now, it's devastating, knowing that he unintentionally put him in this state. But then. It's only been a short while since Louis arrived, and Harry knows from experience that things don't just get better overnight. Especially in cases like Louis' where it's been ingrained into him as all alphas. However, Harry has hope that Louis will trust him, alpha and all, even if he doesn't end up trusting alphas in general. Hopefully Harry, at least, will be the only exception, and he plans to prove his worth as a friend, alpha, carer and possibly boyfriend. 

The water is warm when he puts his foot in, submerged in bubbles before water. Everything has a pink tint to it from the bubble bar, which makes everything about the situation seem so much more delicate than it is. And it's pretty damn delicate to begin with.  
By the time he's sat down, he's cringing at the wet feeling of his boxers but he's pushing his legs either side of Louis' body. Enclosing him. He reaches his arms around the smaller boy too, and pulls him to his chest, whispering _I'm not gonna hurt you, little one, I promise. I never could_. He feels Louis tense up at the touch before relaxing. The room is quiet now, the only noise the crackles of the popping bubbles and the water rippling against the sides of the tub. Louis still has his t-shirt and trousers on, which feels horrible against the bare skin of Harry's chest but for now he's content. Happy holding Louis in his arms, letting him and his omega get used to him and his alpha, safety after a potential threat. Harry won't let Louis go until he's sure Louis thinks he's safe again. 

They stay like that, unmoving for about five minutes, Harry's cheek rested on Louis' back and arms linked around the smaller boy. He's been breathing in Louis' scent the whole time, along with the smell of the bubble bar. It's so peaceful, he can feel Louis getting less tense, less nervous and more used to Harry showing him this comfort.  
"Can I take your shirt off? You can leave it on if you want," Harry makes sure to give him the option to say no, he knows this moment is critical and he knows that he really shouldn't have him topless, even though his intentions are not sexual.  
Louis raises his head and nods, manoeuvring his hands so that they're on top of his knees instead of around them, creating a little rest for his chin.  
Harry hums, acknowledging the answer before reaching down under the water to grab the bottom of Louis' shirt. He's just about to pull it up when Louis yanks it down. Harry retracts his hands quick, giving Louis complete control of the situation.  
"You don't want it off? That's oka-"  
"-I do. I do, it, it's just..." His voice cracks at the start, scratchy throat from crying evident as Louis trails off.  
"Hmm?" Harry hums quietly, letting the smaller boy have the opportunity to explain. He places a hand on Louis shoulder, although their legs are touching, he still wants to show the boy as much comfort as he can.  
"My, my tummy... Erm, it's-"  
"It's okay, kitten, your stomach is perfect,"  
"It's not, I'm fa- I don't it,"  
"Hey, listen, it's up to you, okay? Your choice. Even if I did mind whatever you think is wrong with your stomach, which I don't, I can't even see it, babe. I promise you, nothing about you bothers me,"  
Louis is fiddling with the bottom of the t-shirt underneath the water. He seems to be considering what Harry just said in his mind.  
"Okay," he finally mumbled.  
"Okay, what? I can take it off?" Louis nods. Harry drags his hand from Louis' shoulder down to the bottom of his back, not wanting to go for it immediately. He knows that he’s pretty much already overstepping the line with what he’s already doing so he’s trying his best to keep it to minimal events that could make Louis panic again.  
The shirt is a bit awkward to get off, with it being wet, it’s heavier and it’s sticking to Louis’ skin, in a way that Harry would probably like, if only for the aesthetics of it, but in that moment, it means it’s got a horrible upwards drag and it makes everything just slightly irritating.  
“Sorry,” He mumbles as he pulls the neckline over Louis’ face, knowing it’s going to tug on at least some part of Louis, no matter how hard he tries to stop it.  
“It’s okay,”  
Once the shirt is finally off, Harry wraps one arm around Louis’ torso, and drops the t-shirt on the floor, landing with a wet _thunk!_. He wraps his other arm around Louis then, revelling in the quiet and calm of the room for a moment. The air is heavy; something Harry usually hates. But right now, it’s almost like a blanket of comfort, wrapping around them, instead of in between them. He does the only thing he can think of and kisses Louis’ shoulder. It’s fleeting, barely there, a soft press of his lips against the tender skin, and then he’s pulling Louis back against his chest. He knows Louis must feel _extremely_ small right now, but that’s what he’s trying to do. He’s trying to get Louis to connect on an omega level, _then_ he can work at Louis. Harry can feel the tension leaving Louis’ body as he holds him, getting used to the alpha presence that _isn’t_ going to hurt him.  
“I won’t ever hurt you, Louis, I want you to know that, even if you don’t believe it yet,”  
“I want to believe you,” Louis says back.  
“You’ve got time; I’m going nowhere until the moment you say you want me gone,”  
“Okay,”  
And for now it feels like it’s settled. Harry thinks there’s hope, as long as Louis _wants_ to believe him, he’s got a chance. And he also thinks, well, now’s as good a time as any.  
“Louis, I gotta tell you something to make sure you’re okay with this,”  
Louis hums in response.  
“Are you listening?”  
Another more attentive hum.  
“Okay, I’m like, I’m gay, and I just need to know you’re okay with this, now you know that,”  
Harry knows it’s a sugar coated way of saying _this may be the start of something in the future, not right now, but I need to know now if you’re not okay with the potential this has_.  
“Louis?” Harry’s heart about falls through his ass when Louis doesn’t reply immediately. He’s never been able to imagine a life with anybody but the boy in his arms, so he goes to pull his arms from around him.  
“No-,” Louis grabs Harry’s arms, and if Harry’s heart fell out his ass before, in that moment it probably fell through the bathtub and into the room below it, “-I mean yes,”  
“What?” Harry’s confused.  
“I- I’m okay with it,”  
“Are you sure?”  
“Yes,”  
“Then why did you say no?” He has to make sure they’re on the right page.  
“ilikeyourarmsaroundme,” Louis rushes the words so Harry genuinely doesn’t understand.  
“Come again?”  
“You were moving your arms, and, like, I didn’t- I like your arms around me,”  
Oh. _Oh_.  
He tightens his arms around Louis, he can see how much he’s blushing, the tips of his ears a deep red.  
“I like my arms being around you too, kitten, now one last time to make sure, you’re okay with me being gay and doing this, yeah?”  
“I am too,” It’s so quiet, Harry barely catches it over the hiss of the bubbles that are still popping.  
“You’re gay too?” Louis nods.  
“That’s er, that’s good to hear,” Harry mentally slaps himself, what a way to sound uninterested, so he carries on, “-seriously, that’s great, does anybody know?”  
“Lottie, my mum, and I think Fizzy thought it. And my step-dad assumed I was. And Zayn,” _Wait, Zayn knows?_  
“Zayn knows?” He can’t help himself.  
Louis nods again, “Yep, we were, um, talking the other day. He told me that he’s ase- He told me his sexuality so I told him,”  
“Yeah?” Harry pulls his arms from around Louis. “Is it okay to wash your hair?” He asks before Louis can panic about his arms retracting.  
Louis seems to consider for a moment, before nodding.  
“Yeah… He’s the only one outside my family that knows. Oh, and Stan, I think,”  
“Stan?” A big dollop of shampoo lands on Harrys hand and he rubs them together before gently carding his fingers through Louis’ hair. Louis visibly relaxes into the touch.  
“Yeah. He was my best friend. Um, a long time ago. He always would speak about who he was crushing on, and they were always girls. I- I never really liked girls, and I guess I just realised that I liked boys more. Well, looking at them. I didn’t have any, er, crushes, though,”  
Harry’s massaging Louis’ scalp now, Louis’ head has leant back into the touch slightly as he was speaking and as Harry worked the shampoo in thoroughly. Lou probably does need to trim it soon, or at least cut it into a style.  
“I get you; I think I’ve always known I was gay. There was never any, like, revelation, you know? I think I just always preferred how guys look,”  
Louis nods in answer and Harry fills a jug up with water to rinse Louis’ hair, tilting his head back and covering his forehead to shield his eyes.  
“Does anybody know?” Louis asks once Harry’s done and grabbing the conditioner.  
“Yeah. I never explicitly came out though. Like there was never a moment where I was like, _I’m gay_. It just sort of happened, ever since I was little my parents didn’t make a big deal if I thought a guy on TV was attractive, I was always open about it with my family. And Zayn, Niall and Liam, basically those closest to me, the rest of the house, I dunno if they know. I don’t care if they do or not,” Harry rubs the conditioner through Louis’ hair and lets it soak, then absentmindedly squirts some showergel onto his hands and starts rubbing Louis’ neck and shoulders and upper back.  
“But then,” He continues, not sure whether he should bring it up or not, “-Alphas being gay is a lot more accepted than Omegas, I guess, which is… Fucking dumb to me, to be honest,”  
Louis nods a little bit, and its then that Harry realises he’s been cleaning Louis. It’s scary how quickly he fell into being intimate with him. It’s not even sexual, just literally intimate.  
“Shit- Is this okay?” He retracts his hands from the smaller boy’s upper body, feeling like he’s accidentally crossed a line and that Louis was just too scared to speak up.  
“What?”  
“Me, er, cleaning you?”  
“Oh. Yeah, it’s fine, it’s good, yeah,” Louis shuffles back a little bit.  
Harry breaths out a short laugh and goes back to massaging Louis’ skin.  
There’s silence for a moment before Louis speaks.  
“People don’t really like gay omegas. Male ones, anyway,” There’s a sad tone in his voice and it breaks Harry’s heart so much that all he can do is pull Louis’ back against his chest and hug him for a moment.  
“I do. More than most, would you believe it. And my family, and Zayn and Liam and Niall. They’ll all love you for who you are. You’re free to be whatever you want to be here, okay? Just… Fuck what people think. You’ll always have us,” Harry squeezes him tighter as he finishes the sentence.  
There’s a short sniffle from Louis and then a tiny _thank you_.  
Harry makes quick work of rinsing his skin and standing up, pulling Louis with him and helping him out, pulling the plug and hugging Louis properly for a second. He’s still got his trousers on and they’re dripping and Harry’s boxers are feeling gross against his skin, but it’s nice for the moment.  
He wraps Louis in a towel and grabs one for himself.  
“I don’t want to be alone,” Louis speaks quietly, and the sound of the water rushing down the plug almost drowns it out completely.  
Harry thinks for a moment.  
“Okay. Do you want to take a nap?”  
Louis nods.  
“Go get some boxers or pyjamas on then, I don’t mind which, I’ll do the same and just come through when you’re ready,”  
“Into here?”  
“No. Into my room,”  
Louis’ eyebrows furrow a little but he goes into his room anyway.  
Harry watches him go before running into his own room, leaving the door unlocked but shut, and makes quick work of drying himself and shoving on some boxers and spraying himself with some deodorant to mask the alpha scent that is inevitably going to be radiating off him, being so close to his rut and so close to an omega at the same time. He doesn’t want to freak Louis out with his scent.  
It’s not long before he hears a tentative knock on the bathroom door.  
“Come in!” He calls.  
He watches as the door pushes open. Louis is in his boxers, tan skin glowing in the natural light of Harry’s room. His arms are crossed over his stomach, obviously self-conscious.  
“You look good, do you wanna get in the bed? Are you comfortable enough in here?” Louis nods and walks over to the bed.  
“Which, um, side do you sleep on?”  
“Usually the one on the far side, I’ll be there in a moment,”  
Harry finds it strange how much he wants Louis to be in here with him, usually he hates people being in his room, probably from growing up in a place which had so many people in, he’s always loved being around people but he does need some space for himself, time to recharge, room to do it in. Niall, Zayn, Liam and Cara are the only ones he lets in here aside from his family. Now adding Louis in. He looks at Louis for a moment, smiling gently at the smaller boy as he climbs into his bed. Harry grabs a bobble and shoves his hair up in a bun before walking over to the other side of the bed and grinning at Louis, who’s dwarfed by the huge bed.  
“Cute, am I alright to get in?”  
Louis nods and Harry climbs in next to the boy.  
“You wanna cuddle?”  
“Please,”  
Before Harry can turn on his side to spoon him, Louis shuffles closer and rests his head on Harry’s chest, arm and leg thrown over his body. There’s a surge of adoration for the smaller boy in Harry’s chest and he feels like it’ll burst at any minute, but he settles for a grin instead, wrapping the arm Louis is lying on around him and the other hand rests on Louis’ shoulder. He could stay like this forever, he thinks.  
Neither stay awake long after that, too tired and both content in each other’s arms, listening to the others breathing. 

\---

“ _Fuck_!”  
Louis jolts awake when he hears Harry swear. He feels woozy, and Harry smells _really_ good.  
“Louis. Lou, babe are you awake?” He feels Harry practically fall out of bed.  
“Louis?!” Louis wakes up properly at the sense of urgency in Harry’s voice, opening his eyes and sitting up to look at him. His cheeks are flushed and he looks out of breath.  
“Louis, you’ve, _fuck_ , you’ve got to go,”  
Louis can’t quite comprehend what’s happening, why is Harry kicking him out? What did he do wrong? He climbs out of bed quickly, still staring at Harry, eyebrows furrowed and tears beginning to swell in his eyes.  
“What did I do?” He tries to keep his voice from cracking and giving away his emotions, but the world hates him, and it’s obvious he’s about to cry.  
“Shit, Lou, I promise it’s not you, just, please go find Zayn, please,”  
He feels frozen to the spot by the bed, blood running cold through his body as he watches Harry.  
“Louis please!”  
Harry moves closer to him, round the bed, and it scares Louis into motion, he walks towards the door quickly, scared that Harry’s going to hurt him if he doesn’t. He risks a look back at Harry once he gets to the closed door and immediately spins round to face him because the boy is closer than he thought.  
_Fuck, why does he smell so good_?  
Before he knows it he’s being gently pushed against the door, trapped in by Harry’s arms by his sides and that’s something he didn’t realise he ever wanted. His breathing speeds up and he stares up at the alpha.  
“ _Fuck,_ ” He hears Harry whisper, and something about Harry’s smell makes him even dizzier up close, makes him want to stay with the alpha. He can’t help it, can’t resist when his head falls back against the door, essentially baring his neck to the alpha without even realising.  
Harry _moans_ and Louis gasps in shock when he feels Harry scenting his neck, nose pressed against the skin there, breath heavy. Louis’ sure he’s growling a little bit too.  
“Smell so good, Lou,”  
He feels Harry’s hands on his hips then and lets his eyes close, enjoying whatever the hell is happening for all of two seconds before Harry’s pulling away, not even looking at him.  
“Louis, please go and find Zayn, it’s not you, fuck, I promise it’s not you,”  
Louis, hurt by Harry pulling away quietly opens the door and shuts it behind him as he leaves, not saying another word to the alpha.  
“Fuck sake, Louis, wait!” He hears, then a few moments later the door opens and he catches a black object in his arms, before the door slams shut again. He hears the door lock violently then, and he’s stood alone in the hallway in just his boxers. 

The fact that Harry just kicked him out sinks in fully, and he bursts into tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HIIIIIII! hope you're well, thanks for reading and waiting, lemme know what you wanna see and whether you enjoyed please !  
> comments and kudos always appreciated xxxx


	11. your tunnel vision haunts you (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is split into two. There's no Harry POV in this one but there will be later in the next chapter (part two)!

Louis is currently in his and Harry's room in the tent, burrowed in the sleeping bag that they slept in together the previous night. He's still sniffling, keeps wanting to burst into tears again at Harry's outburst.   
   
_He hates me, he's finally had enough of me._  
   
It was Perrie who found him in the sleeping bag while waking everyone up shouting that Liam and Harry had to put the tent away. He'd ran down to the tent instead of finding Zayn like Harry had told him to.   
   
_Broken omega, can't do anything right._  
   
Zayn's by his side, rubbing his arm over the sleeping bag. He'd asked if he should get Harry, which Louis had scrambled to say 'no' to. Zayn's been taking what seems like curious sniffs of the air every now and then since he came in.   
   
_You took too much from him, you're too much work._    
   
He hates the fact that it's Harry's scent calming him down, hates that he let himself get so close to Harry and begin to trust him.   
   
_You knew this was coming._  
   
It's around half an hour after Harry had sent him out his room, Louis is sufficiently cried out. His eyes are hurting, he probably looks like a tomato with how red he probably is. He glances up at Zayn, who's still rubbing his arm, albeit a lot slower and softer than when he was crying. A yawn escapes the young boys mouth, worn out from all the crying. He doesn't get to sleep though, Zayn notices he's looking.   
   
"Hey," There's a comforting smile on Zayn's face but Louis can tell Zayn doesn't know what to say, misses Harry already, if only for the way that he calms him down.   
"You okay?" Louis doesn't trust his voice, so he just shrugs, because no, he's definitely not okay, but admitting that will make it worse.   
Zayn hums in consideration then winces.   
"You're not gonna like this, but you gotta tell someone what happened,"   
"No,"   
"Louis, it's either one of us or Gemma or Anne. It's for your own health and safety... they need to know,"   
   
Louis sighs. He knows Zayn's not just being an asshole, and he probably should listen to him, but it's a bit embarrassing just admitting that Harry now hates him, made him get out and left him in the hallway. He does just that, summarising it in as few words as he can.  
"Okay, I sincerely doubt he'd just get fed up of you and throw you out his room, mate,"   
"Well-" Louis starts.   
"-wait, you were in his room?"  
Louis nods.   
"Okay. Do you mind telling me what happened from when me and Ni' left?"   
Louis flushes red.   
"Please," Zayn adds.   
Louis sits up a little, wanting to curl in on himself. He's picking his fingernails and refusing eye contact as he explains.   
"Um, w-when you and Niall left, Harry... He um, he started asking me questions about like, here. Skylar I mean. And I got kind of lost in my own head. And I sort of like, zoned out. But Harry, he waved his hand in front of me, and it scared me. Because I thought-" He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, "I thought he was going to hit me."   
"Harry would never hit anybody. Especially you,"   
Louis furrows his eyebrows, what is _especially you_ supposed to mean? He’s only able to think for a second before Zayn nods to carry on.   
"I ran off because like, I was scared, and I ran into the bathroom and locked the door. I didn't know what to do because, um, I was embarrassed so I turned the shower on because I was crying and I didn't want to feel the tears. Harry, sort of, like, came round the other side of the door and came in to me,"   
"Were you naked?!" Zayn asks.   
"No! No. I was just sat in the shower and he like, he filled up the bath with a bubble bar and warm water, and then got in behind me. He was in his boxers but it was nice, like, he took my shirt off too but just hugged me. He- he told me he was gay and I told him too,"   
Louis notices Zayn's quirk of his lip into a small smile.   
"He washed my hair and like, my shoulders and back and stuff, and then we got out, and I told him I didn't want to be alone. I think that he was bored of me by then. I didn't um, I didn't mean to be so needy. But he got changed and so did I and I went into his room because he said to, and we, we got into his bed and he cuddled me, from behind, and then when I woke up he was mad at me,"   
Louis is holding back tears at this point; Zayn's hand is on his arm, comforting.   
"You gotta tell me what happened, Lou,"   
"He woke me up and he looked really mad, like, he was on the other side of the bed but he was telling me to get out and to find you, and when he started moving I got so scared so I had to go, but on the way to the door I looked behind me and he was there, and he pressed me against the door and he told me I, he told me that I smell good? And he started sniffing my neck but he got really mad then and made me get out the door. He threw the jumper out a moment later then shut the door again, and that’s when I came here,"   
Zayn nods for a second, looking deep in thought.  
"I didn't mean to be a bad omega, I swear, I didn't mean for him to get mad at me," Louis feels his heart rate rocket.  
“Hey, calm down Louis, it's okay. You weren't bad," Zayn strokes his hand up Louis' arm, "How come you didn’t come and find me straight away?”  
Louis is a bit confused that out of all of that, he only asked about not going to find him. He sniffs loudly, shame filling his thoughts as he blatantly ignored Harry’s one request, he doesn’t reply.  
“He asked you to come find me for a reason, Lou. How come you didn’t?”  
“I’m sorry,” He blinks a few times and decides to be honest, he can tell Zayn isn’t mad. “I was embarrassed, I really like Harry and now he’s sick of me,”  
He meets Zayns eyes for less than a second but he can see the emotions in them.  
“There’s no need to be embarrassed Louis, Harry’s-,” He pauses, blowing air out his nose. “Harry’s gone into rut I think, Louis. Wasn’t really my place to say, but I don’t want you to think he hates you, he kicked you out for your own good, he’s a good lad. I’m surprised he even managed to,”  
   
Oh. _Oh._  
   
Louis gets lost in his thoughts while his mind pieces it all together.  
   
_No wonder Harry smelt so good._  
   
He thinks back, realising that’s why Harry’s cheeks were flushed, why he pressed him against the door and scented his neck.  
   
_Why would he kick me out then? Does he really not want me that much?_  
   
“Listen, I know you’ll be thinking a lot right now, but that’s all you really can do, it’s not fair on either of you for you to sleep in your room tonight. Would you rather stay with me or Niall?”  
   
Louis glances around the tent, almost smiling at the fairy lights and the amount of effort Harry put into the room. He’s sad because Harry kicked him out at the time an alpha would need an omega most. The only alpha that’s ever shown him any interest doesn’t even want him.  
   
Regardless, it’s still _Harry’s_ scent calming him down now, making him calm enough to talk to Zayn. He doesn’t want to leave the bed.  
   
“Can I stay in here?” He asks. He knows it’s probably super cheeky, but seeing as he isn’t able to sleep in his bed, surely they won’t mind him sleeping in the bed intended _for_ him.  
“I’ll ask, babes, but no guarantees. I gotta go tell Gemma and Anne Harry’s in rut. I’ll be back soon, yeah? What do you want from your room?”  
“My phone and some trousers please, thank you Zayn,”  
Zayn nods in affirmation and stands up, patting Louis on the shoulder and walking over to the door.  
“By the way, I know this is all a bit confusing, but believe me, Harry was doing what’s best, I’m glad he managed to get you out first,”  
Louis nods, not really sure what to do with the information Zayn just gave him, but decides not to question it.  
   
   
\---  
   
   
Anne allows Louis to stay in the tent for one more night but after that it needs to be taken down because of the weather forecast for the rest of the week, Louis is thankful. Niall and Zayn sleep in the room with him, Zayn taking what should have been Louis’ sleeping bag from the night before, and Niall bringing his own in from his room, a few other people scatter around the other rooms in the tent, enjoying the extra night. They don’t really speak much, Louis ends up drifting off super early, probably from all the upset of the day. The other two don’t seem to mind. He’s nervous for the next day anyway. He’s meeting Lou the hairdresser.   
   
\---  
   
   
"Louis, Lou's coming round soon, she's the hairdresser, she wants to know if you want your hair doing?"  
"Um, I don't have any cash to pay her?"   
Zayn and Louis are sat on the sofa in the living room, Perrie and Max are on another sofa, lazing about to daytime TV. Louis had avoided breakfast, not particularly wanting to eat and trying to spend as long as he can in the tent. He got a disapproving look from Zayn but promised him he'd eat some of the snacks he and Harry had left in the tent, staying in there until after lunch. Zayn brought him a sandwich out and Louis ate it reluctantly, but smiled at him to hide his discomfort regardless.  
   
Liam had come not long after and asked him to leave so he could put the tent away, Louis had packed his backpack up, grabbing his and Harry's shared pillow. Liam told him to leave Harry's stuff as he'd take care of it. Zayn had ran Louis' stuff upstairs to his room, and that's how they'd ended up on the sofa.   
   
"Don't be dumb, she gets paid fortnightly from the main account depending on who gets their hair done. You don't have to pay,"   
   
"Oh, um, okay then,"   
   
They go back to watching Jeremy Kyle and leave it at that. Louis’ sort of glad that Zayn isn’t very chatty.  
   
   
\--  
   
   
Lou arrives in a hurricane of apologies; he's tense, nervous to meet the woman now entering the house.  The first thing he notices is her thick northern accent, he can't help but feel a small connection, and it’s an accent that reminds him of home.  
"So sorry I'm late. Lux wouldn't let me go when I dropped her off at her friends, then Sam rang and she couldn't get anybody to look after Sid while she was in a last minute meeting so I had to run and get him. Sorry,"   
He can hear Anne chuckling from the hallway,   
"Lou, darling, it’s fine. No rush, ever, Louis' in the living room with Zayn, you can go through when you're ready. I think Eleanor said she wants a trim too today, tea?"  
He hears a kids squeal in happiness and his heart clenches. It’s been ages since he’s been around kids. He loves them, always has, ever since Lottie came along. He remembers his mum chuckling to herself, mumbling something about omega’s maternal instinct.  
"That’d be great, thanks. Hopefully this little monster doesn't play up too much," She laughs.  
"Hiya Lou, how are you?" Zayn asks, turning the TV down. Perrie and Max say hello then get up and leave.   
Louis is a little bewildered for a moment. Lottie would love Lou, even from first glance. Her silver hair looks just as good in person as it did on Instagram, he almost laughs because it looks like she has a filter on in real life, and how is that fair?  
“I’m great thanks, stressful morning but better now, you must be Louis! Nice to meet you love,”  
Louis stands up to shake her hand, glancing at the child in her arms, he’s young, Louis can tell he’s no older than two. He grins back as as the kid pulls a face at him.   
"This is Sid, my nephew, I'd have my daughter with me usually but she's at a friends overnight, you gonna say hello Sid?"  
Louis bites back his smile as Sid babbles out 'ello' and wriggles to be put down.   
"He's adorable," He says, because if there's one thing he can talk about, it's kids.   
"He's a nightmare," She pulls a bunch of toys out her case for him, which immediately grabs his attention.   
Anne comes in the room with Lou's tea, putting it on the coffee table and handing Sid a bottle of juice.   
"I hope you don't mind but I'm a bit bogged down with work at the moment-" She begins but Lou interrupts, ensuring her that it's fine.

"So, Louis, are you free right now? I can get Eleanor down first but she usually takes quite a while,"   
"I'm free, yeah," He replies.  
"Great, we'll do yours now then shall we?'' Louis nods, her smile is genuine, it makes Louis feel at ease. She's got such a lovely personality already, and something about having a child in the room makes Louis feel more comfortable around this woman than he would usually.

She runs and grabs a chair out of the kitchen, telling him to sit before pulling out her equipment.   
"Do you have a particular style you want it in? I can leave you to have a look for one if you need time?"    
"I do, um. One second. I saw your comment on Har- I saw your comment and thought I'd get some like, ready?"   
He cringes at the thought of Harry, still feeling rejected. He focuses though on finding the pictures he saved in his camera role of the choppy fringe hairstyles while she puts a plastic cape round his shoulders.  
She's supportive when he shows him, happy in fact, then goes on to grumble about every guy having the same fade hair cut nowadays. Louis can't help but giggle.   
Zayn likes it too, after asking to see the reference. Louis is glad Zayn hasn't left him alone with Lou, just put on a cartoon in case Sid wants to watch. He doesn't think he'd mind if Zayn left though.   
"No Harry? With how much you've been on his Instagram I'd've thought he'd be with you?" She starts it offhandedly as she's wetting and combing Louis hair, but it catches him off guard and he's not quite sure how to answer.   
"Um-"   
Zayn finishes for him, thankfully   
"H is er, he's in his room. Um. Probably not best for him to be around Louis right now... or any omega for that matter..."  
Louis feels a blush rise at the snarl that threatens to leave his throat at the mention of another omega being near Harry while he's in rut. Which is... Ridiculous. Harry showed that he didn't want Louis while in rut, if kicking him out in the time he _should_ need Louis most is any indication.   
" _Ohhh..._ Well I hope he's enjoying himself," She laughs as she starts her first cuts into Louis' hair.  
It’s super weird having his hair cut into a style by a professional. Lottie was had just started a course on Hair and Makeup so she’d had plans to do his hair once she learnt how, but other than that, his mum would just trim it into the same bowl-like cut he’s had since he was young, simply because it was easy to maintain.  
   
Louis watches Sid on the floor while he has his hair done, Lou’s got his phone with the reference on it, so he can’t really do much else. Sid eventually gets bored, looking up at Zayn and then across to Louis, recognising that Louis is paying attention to him. He grabs a toy, stumbles to stand up and plods along to where Louis is sat with a grin on his face.  
“Hey there! What’s that you’ve got there?”  
“Iyachuck!” The kid shrieks in happiness bending his knees and Louis can’t help but giggle.  
“Ooh, a firetruck! Very nice, what noise does that make?”  
He laughs as Sid makes what resembles a firetruck noise, running the toys wheels along Louis’ legs, it tickles.  
“That’s right, aren’t you clever!” He’s missed being around kids; couldn’t wait for his mother to give birth and see whether he had another younger sister or his first brother.  
Sid nods enthusiastically, then lifts his arms up to him, firetruck still in hand,  
“Up,”  
Louis’ eyebrows raise in surprise. He glances round at Lou, noticing she’s not cutting at the moment. Her eyebrows are raised too; he ignores it in favour of asking if it’s okay to lift him up. She nods.  
“Hey there, Sid, I’m Louis,” Sid settles in Louis’ lap quickly, Louis’ arms wrapped around the kid.  
“Ooee,” Sid repeats.  
“That’s right!” Louis encourages, bopping his little nose in a playful manner.  
Sid giggles, his tiny teeth making Louis smile. He settles into playing calmly in Louis’ lap, running the firetruck up his arms and shoulders gently. Lou starts cutting his hair again slowly.  
“He’s never done that with a stranger before,” She says. It makes Louis nervous, so he shifts a bit, loosening his hold on the kid enough for it to be visible, but also keeping his arms secure enough that he’s safe should he decide to move suddenly.  
“Is-Is it okay? I can put him down…?”  
“Don’t be daft, he wanted to be near you, just let me know if he gets too much, okay?”  
“Okay,”  
   
Sid isn’t a handful, he ended up whispering ‘ _Ooee warm_ ' and putting his head on Louis’ chest, falling sleep to Louis gently stroking the tufts of hair on the back of his head. Zayn turns back to daytime television; he’s been on his phone the whole time as far as Louis could see out the corner of his eyes.  
 

He's almost drifting off himself, but it seems Lou has finished cutting his hair and is now styling it. He's super excited to see it, it'll be the biggest change he's ever made to his appearance, ever, where he's been able to choose the outcome of it.  
She finishes up, twisting some of the ends with gel and then spraying it with short bursts of hairspray.  
"Right then! All done, I think? Now remember you can say if there's anything you don't like about it and I'll fix it now, I can't get everything right first try so don't worry about offending me, I'd rather you tell me the truth okay?"   
She steps in front of him, holding out a mirror for him to see. He has to shift Sid so that he's lying in just one arm, head on his shoulder but when his reflection comes into view he nearly gasps. She's nailed it, it feels like he's staring at a different person. It's not drastically different, but it's something he chose, something he wanted and something he likes, not just a 'maintainable bowl cut'. He bites his lip in a smile, reaching up to press at his fringe, a choppy, fluffy fringe which falls over his forehead how he's always wanted to have it. It's messy, but a good looking, controlled mess and he thinks it compliments his face really well.   
"Wow... I love it..." He smiles up at Lou, not really knowing how to react. Her face lights up.   
"Really? Everything is all good? Length? Styling? Layers? The fringe?"   
"I love it all, thank you... So much, wow!" He's still fiddling with it, it's so choppy.   
"Amazing. Well, I've got some products here for you of you want them, I get them free because I'm sponsored. Here's some wax, hairspray and mousse. Use the wax first and run it through your hair after brushing, pull bits up to make the layers stand out. Hairspray obviously use when you're done but you can lift bits out and spray them quickly with that too, mousse use if you're drying your hair, it'll make it easier to style and less flat once it's dry. Got that?"   
"Yep. Thank you," He takes the three products from Lou and places them on the coffee table which is in arms distance.   
"Do you mind if I take a quick picture for Instagram? It's basically my portfolio. I don't mind if not? I'll blur out your face if you want me to, pet,"  
“That's fine. You er, you don't need to blur out my face, but what about..?" He trails off, nodding his head down at the sleeping boy in his arm.  
“Pretty much all Sam ever uploads is pictures of Sid, she’s fine with it, promise.  
Louis moves quickly into a more comfortable position, shuffling Sid in his arms slightly. He wakes up a little and his tiny hand clenches around Louis’ shirt and Louis finds himself smiling down at the kid, before catching what he’s doing and looking back up at Lou and the camera.  
   
\--  
   
He moves to the sofa, after trying to lift Sid out of his arms, only to have the kid clench his fists even tighter, Lou looks at him apologetically but he reassures her.  
“It’s okay, I love kids. I’ve got nowhere else to er, go anyway,”  
“How come?”  
He stutters as he sits, not really expecting her to ask.  
“Um- Well, er, Harry’s room is like…”  
“Oh! Shit, my bad, sorry I didn’t think! Just let me know if he gets too much though, yeah?”  
“Will do, he won’t though,”  
“You’d be surprised, he’s such a little shit sometimes, can’t bring meself to be mad at him most of the time ‘cause he’s too cute. I think he’s figured that out already though, the bugger,”  
Louis breathes a laugh out his nose, stroking Sid’s hair, “They always do,”  
“True that, thankfully Lux was never too much of a hassle,”  
   
“I’m gonna go see Liam, you wanna come with?” Zayn asks, interrupting the conversation.  
“I’m okay, I’m fine here,”  
Zayn nods, heading out the room. Lou finishes brushing up the bits of Louis’ hair from the floor, flopping onto the opposite side of the sofa when she’s done.  
“Deffo need a break before I do Eleanor’s, I love doing hair but hell, that girl is so particular it’s like you can never please her,”  
He catches Lou roll her eyes out the corner of his eyes and almost laughs aloud. He decides then in that instant that he definitely likes Lou. It’s not even that he dislikes Eleanor; it’s just that she’s yet to be nice to him, and he doesn’t trust people by default. Plus she was rude to him when everyone was asking him questions at the dinner table.   
"What's Lux like?" He asks, genuinely curious, and she sees Lou's face light up.   
"She's wonderful, so funny and she's just an absolute star. She's so clever, won star of the week last week at school actually! She loves Harry more than me I reckon, Uncle Knobhead,"  
"She sounds great,"   
"She so is. I feel bad 'cause I sort of put her through some shit, like I broke up with her dad a while ago but I realise I'm not quite the person I want to be without him. I think having a break from him made me realise that but I don't know if it's fair for me to get back with him,"   
"I mean, yo-you could always speak to her about it, if she's old enough to be in school I'm sure you'd be able to ask her if she'd want you and her father back together?" Louis says it like more of a question. He's not been in a proper social conversation where the problem at hand wasn't his own in a long time, it's refreshing, even if he is scared he'll say the wrong thing. "-and if, like, if she says yes you can build him back into both of your lives gradually, so that she has, has time to figure it out or like, tell you she's not okay with it?"   
Lou frowns, clearly thinking it through. Louis just looks away from her and out the window. It's such lovely weather outside, the sun's bright and there's a few clouds, but Louis knows it's due to rain later in the night so he has to sleep in Zayn's room until Harry is finished with his rut. Louis looks back at Lou, not particularly wanting to think about Harry right now. He's still hurt that Harry kicked him out.   
Lou's looking at him when he spins his head back round, a small smile on her face.   
"You know what, you're right. Every single one of my friends have all either said get back with him or don't, without even considering Lux's feelings,"   
Louis blushes.   
"I-i mean she was your main con-concern,"  
"Yeh, that's what I mean. You actually gave me an answer involving Lux, thank you,"   
"That's okay, I hope everything, um, works out. With you. And Lux's dad, I mean,"   
"Mm, thanks. Relationships are sometimes shit, I've never been great at 'em. What about you? You looking?"   
For a moment Louis almost blurts out that he likes Harry, catching himself and shaking his head. He knows Lou and Harry are probably quite close, and it's embarrassing enough that Harry kicked him out. He still can't get over it, has been trying to ignore how hurt he is that Harry doesn't want him at all like that. But at the end of the day, it's devastating to him, the one alpha that has ever shown any possible interest in him, and he still doesn't want him. Louis thinks that's more proof than any that Harry is only kind to him like he is because of his job.   
"No, um. Not really," He feels himself sink a little into the couch, recoiling in on himself because of his thoughts, he chooses to focus on Sid instead, the tiny breaths he can feel through the drool on his shirt.   
"Ah, I'm sure there are plenty of Alphas that'd want you though, male omegas a well rare, other than you I think I've only met two, you're special,"   
Louis doesn't answer, his eyes almost well up at how sincere she sounds. He looks across at her with a hopeful expression and she reaches across and taps his nose playfully.   
"Promise. But I think that little monster is gonna be an omega," She nods down at Sid in Louis arms and Louis gives her a confused expression.   
"He's basically latched onto you, like, that's super weird. He's never taken to anyone so quickly. We've been thinking it for a while, he's already got omega traits, and Sam told me the other day he was sick when Tomo shouted on the phone to someone, he'd cried that his tummy was hurting earlier in the day though. It's never happened before so she's waiting to see if it was just a one off,"   
"Will they still, um, love him? If he is?" Louis doesn't mean to say it, doesn't mean for his hold on the boy to get a little more protective. He knows immediately after he says it that it could be taken in the wrong way, and that he could get hit for even thinking it, but he can't help it. He doesn't want this little bundle of cute in his arms to go through the same thing he did for something he can't even control. He can't even meet Lou's eyes, can't look up for fear that she's going to smack him for even suggesting it.   
"...I-Yes! Of course! It wouldn't... It won't change a thing. They'll love and support him no matter what. So will I, and the rest of his family,"   
Louis finally plucks up the courage to look at her, almost regretting suggesting that they might not love him. He also almost regrets looking up at Lou. She's got an apologetic look on her face. Louis reads it as pity.   
_You don't deserve pity. Selfish omega. You deserve everything bad thing you got._  
"You're going to be a great mother one day, Louis,"  
Sid wakes up before Louis can ask what she means.

\--

Louis takes Sid into the garden, savouring the last few hours of sun, before the clouds roll in with the rain. Eleanor had paid no attention to Sid as he walked over to her with his toy, merely glancing up from her phone at the kid, then to Louis then back to her phone. He'd asked immediately if he could take Sid outside then, not wanting the kid to try and communicate with Eleanor anymore.

He finds a soft sponge ball and kicks it towards Sid, who promptly picks it up and throws it. (It lands less than a metre away from the little boy but Louis still cheers as though it was the best throw he'd even seen.) Sid ends up near the fence, furthest away from the pond because Louis doesn't want there to be any risk of the kid falling in, it means that Louis has his back to the house.

Louis plays with Sid for ages, giggling with him as he tried to mimic everything that Louis does with the ball. He falls over a few times and Louis almost shits himself even though he's falling on soft grass. He's a little champ though and gets up with a giggle every time.

They're in the middle of a game which consists of Sid rolling the ball between Louis' legs then crawling through after it, trying to get through before Louis can reach down and tickle the boy’s sides, when Louis hears Zayn cough. It scares him at first, making him jump just enough that he picks Sid up quickly and holding him in his arms protectively as he turns around.   
He realises two things then. One; that it's only Zayn and that it was only a cough, and Two; that Zayn has his phone pointed at them as though he was taking a picture. Sid is smiling toothily at him, oblivious to Louis' panic and obviously thinking it’s part of the game.   
"Hey, just me, sorry for scaring you, I'm back," Zayn looks down at his phone for a second and then back up, with a smirk on his face.  
“It’s okay, um, how long were you there?” He sets Sid down who runs and grabs the ball.  
“Not too long, a few minutes at most,”  
“Oh. Okay,”  
Just then Lou appears at the back door behind Zayn.  
“Time for me and Sid to jet off, c’mon Sid, shall we go see mummy?”  
Sid looks between Lou and Louis for a few seconds, surprising Louis when he walks over to him, arms in the air to be lifted up.  
“’Ug!” Louis grins brightly, following his wishes and lifting him up and into a hug. Sid’s arms are clamped around his neck as he walks him over to Lou.  
   
“Thanks for keeping him occupied, Louis. It was so great meeting you, I’ll see you soon?”  
Louis just nods, biting his lip to keep how happy he is inside. Lou is so easy to get along with. He says one last goodbye to Sid and fist bumps with him, giggling as Zayn does the same.  
   
\--  
   
Louis and Zayn had been sitting in the chairs by the pond, the rain that's scheduled still hasn't broke through yet so they’re enjoying the fresh air. Niall had swung by and chilled with them for about half an hour, offering to play Fifa with ether of them. Zayn had laughed, mocking him because he knew that he was only offering because _he_ wanted somebody to play with. Louis wasn’t in the mood, and Zayn isn’t big on Fifa anyway, so they both politely declined.  
   
Zayn had ran in to get them dinner once it was ready, seeming to know that Louis doesn’t want to eat in front of anybody at the moment, but insisting that because Harry wasn’t able to check that he was eating, he was going to have to, explaining that even though Harry, Gemma and Anne run the place, everybody else helps whenever they can, even with each other.  
   
Louis eats as much as he can, which isn’t too much, his nerves have always affected how much he eats, that, plus he was feeling terrible about himself. He’s so thankful that Zayn isn’t chatty. He’s exhausted from looking after Sid and meeting Lou. They ate in silence, Zayn changing the song playing on his phone every once in a while, looking up at Louis for approval.  
   
He wishes he had a jumper because it’s freezing, but Zayn took the jumper Harry threw at him up to his room when Liam had put the tent away. He’s a little worried about staying in Zayn’s room, he feels like he’s being intrusive already, even though he’s not even in there yet.  
When Zayn takes their plates in, Louis finally checks his phone. He’s got a bunch of notifications and he cringes a little.  
He scrolls through them, freezing when he sees Harry’s name on a text. He ignores it for now, cursing himself at how much he just wants to check the message and reply as soon as he sees it.  
Instagram is what he checks first, seeing that it’s what he has the most notifications on, he’s had it on silent in his back pocket all day, so his first notification is Lou tagging him in a photo. He clicks it with a smile on his face.  
It’s a picture from just before he looked up at the camera, he thinks. From when he smiled down at Sid because his hand clenched around his shirt, you can see it in the picture, and the adoration on Louis’ face. Two other people are tagged in the photo, samanfacam and tomocampbell.  
   
**louteasdale** : _Hair by me. Lovely lad , Sid <3's his new bestie _  
   
He likes the picture and sees that Niall and Zayn have liked it too. He clicks on the comments next.  
   
**samanfacam** : _ah der dribbly sid_  
Louis snorts; he still has dry dribble patches on his shirt.  
**niallhoran** : _@harrystyles_  
Louis’ eyes widen. Why would Niall tag Harry in the comments on this picture? He winces, deciding to ignore it, putting it off as a mistake.  
**louteasdale** : _@niallhoran @harrystyles ;)_  
   
Louis frowns. _Are they mocking me?_ He doesn’t think he could’ve done anything to annoy Lou while she was here, and she seemed open enough to male omegas. He didn’t tell anybody other than Zayn that he likes Harry, and Zayn doesn’t seem to be the type to gossip, unless his character judgement is off, Louis’ baffled, and a little upset.  
   
He goes back to his instagram notifications and sees he’s got a few likes on the things that he’s uploaded and five new follows. Three of them are from Skylar, which he ignores for now, then sees that Sid’s mum and dad have followed him. He follows both back, seeing that at least Harry and Niall follow them.  
He’s about to close out of the app when Harry’s name pops up in his notifications, a comment on Lou’s picture of him and Sid.  
It’s a simple comment, three broken heart emojis, and Louis doesn’t quite understand what it means, but he ignores it, the same as he did with Niall’s comment. Ignoring it seems like the safest option for a lot of things at the moment.  
   
He clicks on the search button, debating whether he should do what he’s thinking. He probably shouldn’t, but he misses his sisters so much. Seeing how into hair Lou was, and looking after Sid has had him thinking about his family all afternoon. He knows Lottie spoke about Instagram before, or at least brought it up to Fizzy. He never had a phone so they never spoke about anything tech based. He decides to go for it, and searches ‘ _Lottie Tomlinson_ ’. The search results are immediate and his breath catches because _shit, that’s Lottie, my baby sister_.  
He takes a deep breath, finger hovering over the result, staring at the tiny picture of his sister. Clicks it.  
   
**lottietomlinson**  
   
He feels his eyes well up immediately at all the pictures of her and his sisters. She’s so gorgeous, he misses her like crazy. He’s not spoken to her since the day his step-dad left him and took his family. That was around three months ago now, he spent time in a hospital, then Des, who he’d briefly met before having to go to the hospital, had come for him, told him about what they do and that he promised to find his family, and that he knew that Louis’ stepdad was a bad person who sold bad things, and that he roped an unwilling Louis into it. He took him to a hotel like room, one of three, where he worked. There was 24 hour surveillance, and he’s sure Des slept on the same floor as him somewhere. They gave him a lot of books to read, he had a lot of appointments and meetings with various people, he had to give as much information as he could, they said the more information he gave, the quicker that Des would be able to find them. It was the most stressful few months of his life, but already a million times better than where he was before.  
   
He clicks on the first picture of Lottie, the most recent one, and sees that it was posted the day before he fucked everything up. The day before he last saw her. He starts crying, realising she hasn’t been active since and that a lot of the comments are from her friends, asking where she is and if she’s okay. He screenshots the picture and scrolls through them all, screenshotting his favourites. He’s almost at the bottom of her posts when he sees himself. He’s never seen the picture; somebody must have taken it of him and Lottie when they weren’t looking.  
   
He and Lottie sitting cross-legged on her bed. He would rarely go in hers and Fizzy’s room, especially when his stepdad was home, he’d yell if he went in there, calling him a pervert and that he was sick. He never understood, but it made him feel awful when he did go into their room.  
He remembers this day though; they were sitting on the bed, Lottie and Fizzy were speaking to him about their days at school. It’d turned into a giggle fit, which ended in Fizzy betting whoever laughed next would lose, so Louis and Lottie had turned to face each other, cross legged, staring each other down with happiness in their eyes and held in laughter.  
   
He can see it now; they both look like they’re going to burst into laughter any second. He also sees though, how ill he looks. His face looks sickly, cheeks concave, eyes sunken in despite the enjoyment in them. He looks deathly pale, body swarmed by the old, ratty hoodie which he loved so much because it hid his stomach. His hair looks limp, dry and dull. He looks awful.  
   
The first tears fall when he reads her caption though.  
   
_I love you forever. You’re my favourite human. I promise you the world will treat you better one day. You deserve the best._  
   
He looks up at the sky, trying to will the tears back in. He just wants to hug her, tell her that he loves her too. He’d always insisted he was fine, that nothing was ever wrong. When the girls were young they wouldn’t even question it. They’d just go about their lives, minds too tiny to even comprehend that anything was wrong. But as they got older, Lottie especially would know. She’d slip Louis some chocolate or sweets here and there, offer her things to him, and buy him a t-shirt here, some socks there etc. Louis never really realised just how much she’d noticed.  
   
He screenshots the picture, regardless of how ill he looks, because right now, it’s the only picture he has with her. He doesn’t follow her though, doesn’t like any of her pictures, just leaves it.  
   
\--  
   
He manages to dry his eyes before Zayn gets back, calling him inside and taking him up to his room where there’s a bed set out for him on the floor. He can smell Harry’s rut faintly on the landing. Wants to go into his room and let Harry do whatever to him, which is a ridiculous thought, for many reasons, the main two being that he's not even emotionally ready for an alpha/omega friendship, let alone more, and that Harry already made it quite clear that he has no intention of wanting Louis like that at all.

He and Zayn have an early night, only chatting for about half an hour before Louis declares he's tired. He's in Harry's jumper again, he refrained from wearing it during the day for fear that somebody other than Zayn, Liam or Niall would notice. Zayn doesn't know that he'd been crying, if he did realise he's not brought it up, nor does Louis bring it up, or the reason why he was crying in the first place. It's his own fault, really. He had the choice of looking up his sisters instagram. 

_Shouldn't be such a crybaby._

Louis checks his phone before he sleeps and sees Harry's name in the notifications. A deep sigh escapes his lips as he clicks on the name, cringing because he just wants to ignore Harry and stop getting any more attached to him; to rid Harry of the burden that is Louis. 

**Harry**

_Hey. I'm so sorry about yesterday... I hope I can make it up to you. I hope Zayn told you what was, um .. going on? Anyways. Can't believe that I missed you playing with Sid :(_

 

 _I'm guessing you're asleep early or something ... sleep well, Lou. Xx_

Louis feels bad but he decides to ignore the messages. He doesn't know how to respond without coming across as clingy, Harry probably doesn't want him to respond anyway. 

He still goes to sleep wishing the alphas arms were around him though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back to you is a BOP ! What are your opinions !? And did anybody else get tickets to see Harry!? HMU IF YOU'RE GOING TO THE LONDON DATES !!
> 
> Comments and kudos are so so appreciated. Thanks to everyone who comments and everybody who is patient with my terrible updates. Part two won't be long - it's almost completely written but I'll wait a week or two before I upload so keep ya comments coming in !!


	12. my pride watched you leave (part 2)

Harry is almost certain that Louis is ignoring him. He’s _trying_ not to be a creep about it but he’s failing, miserably. He slept after texting Louis, desperate to get a full night’s sleep after spending the last few days waking every few hours to grind into the bed sheets until his knot pops. He woke up and Louis hadn’t replied, which, hey, it was okay he could still just have been asleep. But Louis hadn’t replied through cleaning his room, taking the longest bath he’s taken all year, _and_ the whole time he’s been sat on his balcony.  
He didn’t _mean_ to notice that Louis had been active on Instagram in that time, it’s just that when he was checking his own, he’d noticed that Niall had put a picture of two X-Box controllers up, tagging Louis, an hour ago. And Louis had commented. So Louis had been on his phone, and ignored him.

Harry shakes his head as he locks his phone _it’s probably nothing, he probably just missed the text notification_ , he thinks, _notifications_ …  
The suns’ warmth feels like bliss on his now clean skin. He hates being holed up inside for too long, loves the fresh air, even if it’s just nipping out to the shop for his mother or chilling on his balcony sofa for ten minutes. He can see that Liam put the tent away, probably the first night his rut came early.

He grimaces at the fact that his rut came early. He _knows_ now that he and Louis have a soulbond. He knows full well that an omega can’t trigger an early rut unless it’s a soulbond. He’s been thinking about it every time he’s come into a decent frame of mind, where he isn’t fucking the sheets and imagining it being Louis underneath him instead.

He thinks back to the when Cara first mentioned it, and when Gemma confronted him about liking Louis and mentioning that she thought there was something more to it, and when she’d told him not to rush things. He understands what she means now about maybe not having enough self-control one day; it took everything he had not to keep Louis with him for his rut, even if it were to keep Louis safe from everyone else while he wasn’t able to look after him. He knows he’d never hurt Louis, but if he went into heat properly, Louis’ omega would be telling Harry to mate him, and if Harry went into rut when that happened, there’s almost no way he’d be able to not mate the smaller boy. The consent of Louis’ human side is what he needs. Without it, he’d never forgive himself. He’d also lose his job, and everything his parents have worked for.

He’s in deep, basically.

He sends a text to Cara, a quick _Hey, can I come over?_

\--

Half an hour later, he’s at Cara’s house. He’d got funny looks in the shop because of the lingering scent of his rut, but he’d not eaten properly for a few days, despite Liam bringing him food at regular intervals.

“So, I know that your rut wasn’t due until next week, is that what this is about?” Cara raises an eyebrow at him as she pats the space next to her on the sofa, shoving her university papers onto the table in front of them.  
“Yep,” He takes a huge bite of his sandwich.  
“Well? Definitely a soulbond then?”  
Harry hates that she’s so casual about it when it’s driving him insane. He nods anyway.  
She doesn’t answer, just stares at him. Harry takes it as a cue to continue.  
“He had a little freak out, and locked himself in the bathroom, so I went round my side, cause, well you know how it’s set out,” She’s used his bathroom enough times to know, “And I let myself in, I made sure it was alright to first, obviously,” He rushes to get out before she smacks him round the back of the head, “And he was just sat in the bath, like, fully clothed, with the shower on, but he was crying, and I felt like shit for making him cry, Cara, even though I didn’t mean to,”  
He furrows his eyebrows at the memory, trying to forget the distressing image in his head. Cara pulls Harry’s head into her lap, gently stroking her hand through his hair to calm him down. Not many people know how much he loves having his hair stroked. He brings his gangly legs up onto the sofa as he continues.  
“I knew that like, he’d feel a bit better and like, safer it was little bit more… Primal? So like, my alpha, his omega, connecting a bit more, and I know I shouldn’t have even thought about it, and you can’t tell mum, but I stripped us both down t- I know, I know I shouldn’t have,” Cara is giving him a disapproving look from above him, “I was in my boxers and he was still in his trousers, and I made sure he was okay with it, obviously, I’d never just assume and do something. I ran us a bath with one of the bubble bars I got him and got in behind him,”  
Harry shuts his eyes, surprised that Cara isn’t pulling his hair out. Instead, she urges him on.  
“I just hugged him for a while, reassured him like. Then I er, I told him I’m gay,”  
“He didn’t know?”  
He shakes his head as he continues, “He told me he is too, and we spoke about that and I asked if I could wash his hair, and he let me,”  
“That’s very… Alpha of you…”  
“I know, I ended up cleaning his upper body too without realising but he didn’t mind, and said it was okay when I realised. When we were done, I asked if he wanted to nap, ‘cause I’ve noticed he gets really tired after he cries, I was knackered too. We both put dry boxers on in our own rooms, and then he came through to mine. And then we slept,”

Cara reaches over Harry and grabs the bag of crisps he hasn’t eaten yet and starts munching, shoving one in his mouth when he complains. They eat in silence for a moment, then Cara is laughing.  
“I know it doesn’t end there, dumbass,”  
Harry narrows his eyes at her.  
“Well, I was behind him, spooning him,”  
“Naturally,” Harry smiles, remembering how much he and Cara used to cuddle like that.  
“And well... I think his body tried to uh… go into heat,”  
He mumbles the last part but judging by the way Cara chokes on a crisp and yells, “You WHAT?!” She heard loud and clear.  
He should’ve expected her reaction. She’s the only person he’s told, he’s certain that Louis doesn’t even know his own body tried to go into heat.  
“Er, yeah,” He runs a hand through his own hair, regretting telling her, “I think that’s what triggered my rut,”  
“What the fuck?” Cara is still staring at him and he tries to smile awkwardly.  
“I’m serious, when I first woke up, his body was really hot, against me, and at first I thought it was me but then he, like, whimpered almost, and he smelt like, well, an omega in heat…”  
He rubs his eyes with the heels of his hand.  
“I thought I was imagining it, cause, you know, I was in rut, but I swear I wasn’t. I woke him up, and told him to get out and go get Zayn, I was so fucking _scared_ Cara. I felt like I couldn’t stop myself. I ended up crowding him against the door, I couldn’t help but scent him properly, that’s when I realised it was Louis. Not my imagination. And I think the only reason I was able to send him out was because his body _wasn’t_ able to go into a full heat, like as though my body knew Louis wasn’t ready for it,”

He can’t even look at her right now, but he’s assuming she’s still staring at him.  
“So you think Louis’ body tried to go into heat and that’s what made your rut start then? Are you sure?”  
He nods curtly, pressing his lips together in shame.  
“You think his omega is ready and he actually isn’t?”  
“Pretty sure of it, yeah,”  
“So, this is a lot to take in, let me get this straight: You and Louis took a bath together because you wanted your primal sides to be closer, then you slept in the same bed? _Your_ bed, no less. It wouldn’t surprise me if his omega tried to go into heat, you _bathed_ him, then took him to _your_ bed, and he slept in _your_ arms, yeah?”

When Cara puts it like that, he feels like a right twat.  
“You’re a right twat sometimes Harry,”  
“I know,”  
“I’m glad you had enough self control to get him out though, H. Fucking hell,”  
He finally looks up at her.  
“Me too,” He agrees.  
“What about now?” She asks.  
“Huh?”  
“Don’t be a twat, are you gonna tell ‘im?”  
“Tell him what?”  
“Fuck sake Harry, what else? Are you going to tell him that his body is ready to have a heat, and that you’re a fucking _soulbond couple?_ ” She throws a crisp at his head and he grimaces at the gritty flavouring it leaves in his curls.  
“I don’t know, I don’t know if I should to be honest, what do you think?”  
“I don’t know either, do you think he’d-”  
“I just,” He interrupts, “I don’t want him to feel pressured into feeling comfortable around me, or like, feeling obligated to submit to me, I think I’d rather everything happen naturally, I don’t think he knows when my rut was supposed to be, so I’m pretty sure he won’t make the connection that he triggered it early, if he even knows that triggering it early means soulbond…”  
Cara is nodding along to what he’s saying.  
“…And Zayn hasn’t mentioned anything about Louis’ body trying to go into heat, so I don’t think Louis even knows it tried to,”  
“I get you, and what if he goes into heat soon? Like, proper heat?”  
“I don’t know. I mean, I’ll spend it with him if he wants, if we’re together, but I mean, I’m safe for the next two, three months, right? I can’t get triggered early again until after that time?” The Biology teacher at his school skimmed over the Soulbond section of the textbook, probably assuming nobody in the class would be lucky enough to get a Soulbond partner.

“Hold up,” Cara pulls out her laptop and Googles soulbond.

_**Soulbond** _  
_Statistically around one in every ten million couples are a Soulbond couple. This occurs when two individuals belong together in all ways. Everything about these couples should complement the other, be it personality, build, fertility etc._  
_Generally, as Alphas present before Omegas, the arrival of the Omegas heat should trigger the Alphas rut, usually resulting in a synced Mating Cycle, for increased fertility and conception rates. Should the Mating cycle not be spent together, the Alpha will not be able to be triggered early again for 3 months post triggered rut. After this time they are liable to be triggered again by the next arrival of the Soulbond Omega heat._  
_Soulbond partners often feel an inexplicable pull to be with their other as much as they can; they often work better together than apart. Some cases document Soulbond couples at a young age, often dismissed as just close friends until the Alpha and Omega of the couple present._  
_Noticable differences in Soulbond and the more common Bonded, is not limited to the complementary partners. Alphas tend to be more possessive, protective and caring of the Omega, and the Omega tends to be more needy and reliant on the alpha of the Soulbond._

“Well,” Cara begins, “I’m pretty sure that just described you and Louis to a T, and I’ve not even been around as much as usual lately,”  
Harry’s eyes are stuck reading the webpage. He can’t believe how accurate it is, if there were any doubt before, there definitely isn’t now. He and Louis are soulbonded. 

He tells Cara that he’s doesn’t plan on telling Louis about it, nor that his body tried to go into heat. His main priority is making sure that Louis is happy and comfortable with him, and when both Louis and his omega side are ready to have his heat, Harry will be ready to guide him through it, should Louis want him to. He breathes a sigh of relief that he won’t be triggered again for the next three months. The last thing he wants is to lose control and scare Louis if his body tries to go into heat again, which is likely.

\--

“I’m pretty sure he’s ignoring me,” Harry kicks his foot out a little when Cara pokes him in the bottom of his foot. They’re lying on opposite sides of the sofa with their feet up. Harry had helped Cara study for a while, but they’d ended up watching Storage Wars at some point.  
“Who?”  
“Louis,” Harry had sent the blue eyes boy another text about an hour ago, telling him he planned on coming home soon and asking if he wanted to do anything. The lack of responses from Louis were starting to worry him though.  
“Lemme see?” Cara takes the phone from where he’d dropped it on his chest.  
“Hm, weird,” She says, “Well, you did kick him out,”  
“Don’t say that,” He groans back, his alpha already hates him for doing it, and he tried to make sure by giving him his hoodie that his alpha scent would ward off any other alphas – not that there was any showing particular interest at Skylar aside from him.  
“Well you did, so I wouldn’t put it past him to be a bit miffed to be honest, he kind of has the right to be,”  
“Yeah but I can’t help going into rut, like, it shouldn’t have been for another few days…”  
“He doesn’t know that, he just knows you did all that shit for him, the bath and everything, then you kick him out, then Zayn’ll have told him you’re in rut, and I’m telling you, omega logic isn’t the most logical, even though he may not have wanted to, his omega and him will probably come to the conclusion that you kicked him out at the time you _should_ have needed him most,”  
“Are you serious?”  
“Deadly, I’m almost certain that’s how I’d feel, it’s not at all logical but sometimes it can’t be helped,”  
“Fuck’s sake,”  
“Hey, don’t be like that, you did the best thing for him, omega logic just isn’t logical,” Harry knows she’s stressing that for a point but he can’t help but feel bad for how he’s probably made Louis feel.

\---

**Harry :)**  
_Hii. I’ll be back in about an hour or two if you wanted to do something? Xx_

 

Louis frowns down at the text from Harry.  
_Did Harry kick me out to go spend his rut with someone else?_

He had thought that Harry was in his room for his rut and that’s why he wasn’t allowed in his own room. He hates how confused he’s been over the past few days. He hates the fact that he misses Harry and the fact that he _wants_ to talk to Harry, wants things to go back to how they were before Harry’s rut started. 

“Where is Harry?” He wonders out loud to the group. He, Zayn and Niall are in Niall’s room. Niall is playing Grand Theft Auto.  
“Cara’s I think,” Zayn replies.  
_What the fuck? Cara has a girlfriend, and Harry told him he’s gay? Unless it’s normal to share a rut with an omega friend here? Plus Zayn had said he was in his room yesterday?_  
“Oh,” And before he can stop himself he finds himself asking, “And Cara’s girlfriend is okay with that?”  
“Um, yeah, she’s at work, probably,” Liam says.  
Louis really doesn’t get how her being at work is relevant. Are Harry and Cara really that close? He nods at Liam, open mouthed and confused.  
“I’m going to go and study… Am I allowed back in my room?”  
“Yeah, I’ll help you take your stuff back in,” Zayn smiles as Louis helps him up.

\--

He showers first, after not being able to for a few days, Zayn had said he could use the shower but he wasn’t comfortable using the boys main shared bathroom. He knows it was a little gross to go without a shower for that amount of time but he can’t help how he feels.  
The scent of Harry’s rut is lingering still. ‘ _How long to the smells linger? It’s been like two days_ ’.  
He sits down in the shower, thinking back to Harry sat in the bath with him. He’d felt so safe and protected. He’d felt worshipped almost, with Harry washing him and washing his hair and cuddling him.  
_Was that all only because his rut was coming?_  
_Nobody would love you like that, there was an ulterior motive._

He does actually end up studying for a few hours. It takes his mind off of things. He loves to learn and finally having the recourses to do so means he’s over the moon and determined to do well on the exams when he is ready to take them. 

Niall texted him a few hours later, asking if he wanted to come back into his room and watch a movie with him and the rest of the boys. Harry was due home a few hours ago, so Louis politely declined, trying to avoid Harry as much as he could. Niall had then texted saying _Harry’s here ?_  
Louis just ignored it.

Things go without disturbance until he answers a knock at his door. 

It’s Harry. 

The smell radiating from him, the lasting scent of his rut, no doubt, makes Louis’ knees almost buckle under his weight, _almost_ makes him forget that he’s trying to ignore the taller boy. Harry looks hesitant. 

“Hey,” Harry says when Louis doesn’t say anything.  
“Hi,” Louis wants to shut the door because the more Harry looks at him the way he is, the more of Harry’s scent hits his nostrils, the more he wants to cover the distance between them and have Harry’s arms wrap around him.  
He’s stronger than that though.  
“Nice haircut, it looks really good,” Harry’s hand lifts a little, as though coming up to feel his hair, but then retracts quickly.  
“Thank you,” Louis says, looking down at Harry’s hand.  
“Dinner’s ready,” The green eyed boy offers him a small smile, close mouthed and direct.  
“I- I’m not very hungry,”  
He’d completely forgot about dinner, Anne had asked him to be at the table for every meal today, just to make sure he does actually eat something, and according to Zayn, they try and avoid people becoming recluses in their rooms.  
“Sorry, sweets, my mum specifically told me to come get you,” Louis tries not to melt at the use of the nickname, but at the same time he hates how Harry is almost acting like he didn’t just spend his rut with Cara after being such an Alpha to him.  
Louis frowns as he nods. He steps forward, a little closer to Harry, expecting him to step back simultaneously, but Harry stays where he is, still staring at him.  
Louis stares back, lips pressed together in fierce determination not to fall into the alphas arms. As insulted as his omega is about Harry spending his rut elsewhere, it’s pulling him to the scent, begging to be claimed.  
The stare off only lasts a short while longer, before Gemma’s voice can be heard shouting them from downstairs.  
Harry’s expression morphs into an uncertain half smile, not reaching his eyes.  
“Come on then, love, after you,”

Dinner is _awkward_ to say the least. He has to sit next to Harry, Zayn on his right side. He feels like everyone is watching him, and the atmosphere between he and Harry is so noticeable. Breakfast and lunch weren’t so bad, he still felt stared at, but he managed to eat something, staying out of conversation and keeping himself as unnoticeable to everyone as possible. He’s used to that. But now that Harry is back, he knows people are going to be glancing at Harry, and because he’s next to him, he feels stared at by extension. 

“Gonna eat something?” Harry nudges him softly in the arm with his elbow, prompting an answer.  
Instead of answering Louis picks up his knife and scoops up some mashed potato, nibbling slightly on it.  
He sees Harry’s eyebrows rise a little out of the corner of his eyes. He knows he’s pushing his limits but he can’t help it. He knows he’s being unfair on Harry, knows it’s his fault for expecting Harry to be different to all the other alphas he’s ever met, but he can’t bring himself to act like nothing is wrong. Anne smiles at him from across the table when he glances up. Dinner continues much the same, Harry doesn’t try and speak to him again, Niall tries to involve him in conversation a little, but to no avail. 

When after a few people have finished and left the table, Louis decides to excuse himself to avoid any more awkward conversation with Harry. He nips into the kitchen to get himself a few bottles of water, then runs up to his room. 

\---

“Well, what the fuck?” Zayn says when it’s just he and Harry left at the table.  
Harry laughs sarcastically, shaking his head.  
“Yeah, now tell me he’s not ignoring me,”  
“Mm, you’ve got a point,” Zayn nods, fingers pulling at his bottom lip in thought. 

Harry had called Zayn just on his way home, asking where everyone was, so he could make a beeline for them and avoid Gemma’s inevitable _I told you so_ about the soulbond. Zayn had told him Louis left to study not long before he called but that they were all in Niall’s room otherwise. When he’d got there, the first thing Zayn said was ‘ _triggered your rut early then?_ ’ which prompted Harry telling them everything, similar to how he had told Cara. Niall even paused his game to listen. They already knew Harry’s rut schedule, so knew it was triggered by Louis. He told them that Louis’ body tried to go into heat, and not to tell the younger boy but to keep an eye out for him if he does fully succumb to his cycle and Harry isn’t around. Harry had narrowed his eyes at Liam, who laughed and promised he’d get one of the other three boys if he noticed.  
‘ _I knew I could smell something different on him._ ’ Zayn said, ‘ _You know he didn’t know that you’d gone into rut at first. Bit of an awkward conversation for me._ ’  
He’d explained the logic Cara said that Louis was probably following and that he was ignoring him because of it. 

After that, Niall had invited Louis in for a movie on Harry’s request, knowing he’d probably decline or ignore if he asked him, but Louis had said no anyway. Niall had then texted him telling him that Harry was there, much to Harry’s protest, he tries not to be even more insulted when Louis even ignores Niall’s text mentioning Harry.  
(He throws a bottle of water at Niall for revenge.)

After helping his mum with dinner, avoiding conversation with her as much as possible, she tells him to go and get Louis, assuming everything was okay between the two, prompting the most awkward conversation he and Louis have had since Louis arrived. It felt wrong to not be able to make Louis smile; to not be able to hug him like he’d gotten used to since Louis arrived.

\--

Harry crawls into bed that night, thankful for his fresh sheets and relieved that he knows Louis is his own room again. He’d felt terrible at the fact Louis had to vacate the room for the time he was in rut. Everyone knew that Harry wouldn’t do anything, but it couldn’t be risked, the same with the fact that Harry’s scent could have clouded Louis’ mind without intending to. That could have caused a huge problem. 

He’s still a bit uneasy about his and Louis’ current situation. He knows Louis can’t help the way he’s feeling, and it’s reasonable enough to be pissed off for being kicked out with no explanation after that person had been such an alpha to them during the day. He just wishes he could talk to him about it, straighten things out. He just doesn’t want to push his luck and try and talk to him too early, it’s the first time he’s ever seen Louis act like this with anyone, and god knows how long he can be off with someone. Harry doesn’t really want to find out.

_I’ll talk to him tomorrow, let him sleep on it._

He still texts Louis, and simple ‘ _sleep well. x_ ’ Just for good measure. 

\--

Fear. _Again._

This is the third time he’s woken up to this scent. He knows what it is by now.

Louis is having a nightmare. 

He basically jumps out of his bed, his foot getting tangled in the blanket. He trips as he tries to kick it off, but he barely notices, slamming through the door to the bathroom and trying to get into Louis’ room through that door. 

No luck. 

“Fuck!” Harry yells, pushing off the door and running back out of the bathroom and round to Louis’ actual door. He doesn’t think twice before throwing it open, shutting it behind him to give Louis some semblance of privacy when he wakes up and bounding over to the bed.

“Louis, c’mon, wake up, it’s just a bad dream,” He says over and over, shaking the whimpering boys arms gently. He’s got tears streaming down his face, but Harry can’t help but still see beauty on the worry filled face.  
“Lou, babe, wake up, it’s Harry,”  
Louis stops whimpering so much, so Harry carries on talking.  
“Come back to me, yeah? Whatever you’re experiencing isn’t real. Come back to me,”  
Louis startles awake suddenly, eyes adjusting to the dark and looking up at Harry.  
“Hey there, little one,” Harry says before Louis can apologise like he’s done before. He cups Louis’ jaw with his hand, thumbs brushing over the tears on his face, only to be replaced seconds later with fresh tears running down the same tracks. Harry frowns down at Louis, hating how sad he looks.  
“We gotta stop meeting like this, eh, sweets?” Harry lets out a dry laugh.  
“I d-don’t mean to be a hassle, you can g-”  
“Hey, hey now, it’s okay, you’re no hassle, I don’t mind,”  
Louis just sniffles, closing his eyes and rubbing his face into Harry’s hand which is still on his cheek. Harry hates that his hand is wet with Louis’ tears. 

Harry kneels down at the side of the bed, not wanting to overstep any boundaries. He keeps his hand still, so Louis’ cheek is still pressed against it. It feels good to comfort the distressed omega. He’s whispering soothing words, rubbing his thumb along the soft skin of the younger’s cheek.

“You’re safe, I’m here, it’s okay little one,”

Harry watches the shadows in the dark as Louis’ hand comes up to hold onto Harry’s arm. He doesn’t move the hand on his face, just wraps his hand around his wrist.  
“I hate- I hate the fact I feel safe around you,”  
Harry casts a dejected look at Louis, even though his eyes are closed. He doesn’t really want to know why, is just happy knowing that Louis does feel somewhat safe around him is good enough. He doesn’t ask for Louis to elaborate.  
“Harry?” Louis opens his eyes, piercing, even in the dark, “Will- Will you cuddle me? L-like you did after the bath?”  
He sounds so uncertain, Harry almost laughs because, heck, if he isn’t dying to have Louis in his arms all the time. If it were up to him, Louis would never leave his arms; Harry would be able to protect him from everything, anyone bad in his past, anything that could harm him in the outside world.  
Instead of answering, Harry stands slowly, watching as Louis flicks his fairy lights on and scoots over in the bed, turning over and waiting for the older boy to spoon him. Harry bites his lip at how adorable it is. 

As soon as Harry settles in he grabs Louis by the hips and pulls him back into his chest, keeping one arm around his stomach. He brings the other up to stroke Louis’ silky hair, smoothing out the knots from thrashing about in his dream.  
“Thank you,”  
Harry doesn’t reply, just lets Louis take the comfort of him being there. He’s breathing in deep, taking note as the fear gradually diminishes from Louis’ scent. Louis moves one of his hands to rest on top of Harry’s on his tummy. 

Eventually it becomes obvious that neither of the two is going to sleep. Harry speaks first. 

“I missed you these past few days, I’m sorry if that’s weird to say. I know we’re not exactly on, um, good terms,” He almost regrets saying it, but he realises if he’s not being honest about Louis’ heat, and the soulbond, he can at least be honest about his own emotions.  
Louis turns in his hold, Harry holds his breath. His hand is now resting on Louis’ hip, other elbow on the bed, propping his head up as he stares back at the younger boy. Louis is clearly looking to see if Harry is lying. Harry can tell he’s got a lot of emotions running through his head right now. 

“You left?” Louis questions and Harry doesn’t quite know what to make of the question. Left? When?  
“No… I had to make you leave? Remember?” He’s confused; he was in his bedroom for his whole rut – the same as always.  
Louis looks wounded for a second, then just as confused.  
“But… You said when you get back? T- this morning?”  
Harry closes his eyes a second, thinking back to Louis, he doesn’t recall speaking to Louis at all until he got home from-  
“ _-Cara’s?_ ” He almost laughs. Louis just nods slightly.  
“That’s, er, that’s where Zayn said you were when I asked…”  
“I went Cara’s this morning, babe. She’s mated, you met her mate? Lydia? I was in my room for my, um, my rut… then this morning I went to Cara’s to speak with her about yo- something,”  
“Oh, but…” Louis trails off.  
“You can tell me whatever is on your mind, what’s wrong?” Harry rubs Louis’ hip quickly.  
“Y-you kicked me out?”  
“Yeah… I, um, I sort of had to, you’re… even if I _did_ want to spend my rut with you, you’re not… ready?” He can’t exactly tell Louis that it took everything in him to throw him out.  
“Oh,” Louis looks like he’s thinking back on all his irrational logic. Harry is glad.  
They’re silent for a few minutes; Louis is tracing the parts of Harry’s chest tattoos he can see above the duvet.  
“Are you okay?” Harry asks.  
Louis just shrugs as best he can. Harry loves this perfect little bubble that they’re in, just the two of them.  
“I don’t- I don’t know,” It’s comfortable between the two of them, Harry’s happy that Louis feels like he can be honest with him.  
“Care to explain, sweets?”  
It’s clear that Louis is weighing up the pros and cons of telling Harry what’s on his mind; Harry’s learnt to be patient over the years.  
“This is all so, um, new… Everything is so new. And I’m not quite sure what’s what,”  
“Yeah?” Is all Harry replies, fingertips brushing his curvy hips.  
“Yeah. It’s like, everyone is treating me so well, and I don’t know how to handle it, especially you,”  
Harry is impressed at how well Louis is conveying his thoughts.  
“Why me?”  
“Because you treat me better than anybody ever has, and you’re the first alpha that’s ever, like, treated me like that,”  
“Really?” Louis is struggling to keep eye contact.  
“Yeah. My dad, he um, he left when I was young, because I was an o-omega. And my step-dad… He wasn’t like, he wasn’t nice to me because of it, and when he used to make me go with the packages… The other alphas were horrible to me, because I was an omega. A boy one,”  
Harry doesn’t quite understand what Louis means by ‘packages’ but he’s sure his dad will eventually be able to tell him, he doesn’t want to ask Louis because he doesn’t want Louis to have a panic attack over his past when he’s just got him to calm down. What he’s hearing infuriates him. He hates that the small omega in his arms has been treated badly by every alpha he’s come across in his life.  
“Can I tell you a secret?” Harry asks. Louis nods his head.  
“I love that you’re an omega. Even better that you’re a boy,” He offers a cheeky smile to the omega, “You’re everything I’ve been waiting for, on a biological scale, and based on my personal preference,”  
“Wha-What are you saying?” Louis is blushing _hard_. Harry fights a smirk.  
“I’m saying I really like you, kitten,” Harry leans a little closer. The fact that Louis hasn’t freaked out is a good sign.  
“Like, kissing-wise… or?” Louis asks, and Harry smiles. He looks into Louis’ eyes, looking for any hint of negative reaction. His hand rubs up Louis’ side and his fingertips trace the underneath of Louis’ chin as his eyes fall shut. Harry can’t help himself; he kisses both of Louis’ eyes gently, smiling when he feels Louis relax a little. Then he kisses his cheeks, softly, one by one. Then he kisses the tip of his cute nose, his own scrunching in adoration when Louis’ nose twitches under his lips as he giggles. Then, he whispers just before he shuts his eyes, just to make sure, voice low and hooded eyes.  
“Can I kiss you?”  
“Please,” Comes Louis’ answer, breathe fanning over Harry’s lips.  
Harry closes his eyes and licks his lips, hand pressing against Louis’ jawline to lift the boy’s face up to his.

And then he kisses him. A timid peck, feeling the soft skin of Louis’ lips. His lips are tingling where they met Louis’. He pulls back a few centimetres, opening his eyes just enough to see the smile the omega’s face. He smiles himself, and he can’t just leave it at that. He dives back in; keeping the kisses soft and innocent, but each one sends a shock of excitement through his veins. He’s kissed people before, sure, but this is something special. He runs his hand back down to Louis’ hip and pulls the boy closer to him, wanting the boy close, safe, always.  
“Definitely kissing-wise, we can talk more about this in the morning,” Harry smirks as he pulls away, “For now, I think we both need some sleep, yeah?”  
Louis, only opening his eyes when Harry has finished speaking, has the most captivating flush on his cheeks, and his lips are a little pinker than normal, but he looks _happy_ as he nods in agreement. Harry can’t imagine how he looks after more than just kissing. 

He lets the omega settle onto his chest then turns out the fairy lights, smiling to himself in contentment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read this, I truly appreciate it ♥  
> p.s. i think the story will progress a bit faster now x

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on  
> [instagram](https://instagram.com/cryybabykit)  
> [tumblr](http://fondlinsonstyles.tumblr.com/)  
> ^It's all 1d stuff, my personal is [here](http://keepxitxtogether.tumblr.com)  
> Snapchat is - kitlangdon xx


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